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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To tell them to mind their own business (maybe triggering? Eating stuff)

218 replies

TheParisofPeople · 02/04/2018 11:41

Hi,

I’ve been a lurker for a while but finally took the plunge I need some advice because I don’t know which way is up anymore after Easter.

Some friends of mine are convinced i have an eating disorder, I tend to restrict my food so I don’t pig out and I do a reasonable amount of exercise. Not manically though, I’m not a gym fanatic or anything I just walk a lot. I’m a size ten so not anorexic by any means, obviously. My mum is a big fan of diets and weight loss but in a healthy way and is supportive when I want to lose. I recently broke up with someone and it knocked me a bit and I piled on some weight. Like I went up to a 12/14 really quickly and she helped me with a new diet.

So I did the blood sugar diet for a month and it was amazing I melted back to a 10, but I was cold all the time and kept feeling like I was going to pass out. Decided to eat ‘normally’ for a bit but I fast regularly too. This helps me maintain.

Haven’t shifted any more weight but because I refused to binge on chocolate at Easter and I lost quite a bit quite quickly my friends are saying they’re worried I have an ED. All because I don’t want to pig on thousands of sugary calories for no reason and I fast sometimes. Fasting is more traditional at Easter than letting yourself turn into a gross chocolate monster anyway btw. It’s a religious event ffs.

I’m getting fed up of being told to ‘just eat a burger’ by them, or watched when I eat. But I know that when people get sick or obsessed they sometimes can’t see there’s something wrong. Do I sound ok?

Thanks everyone.

OP posts:
sourpatchkid · 02/04/2018 11:46

It sounded fine until you said "gross chocolate monster" and then I saw you had very negative beliefs about certain foods?

expatinscotland · 02/04/2018 11:47

You sound over-invested in all this. It's just food! You can eat chocolate and not be 'pigging out', it's possible to just enjoy that foodstuff for what it is, not think of it only as 'sugary calories'. So many people have orthorexia, particularly on this site. Life is far, far too short to spend it monitoring everything you put in your mouth. Sounds miserable as hell to live like that.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 02/04/2018 11:48

Sorry you lost me at "gross" chocolate monster.
You're being critical of those that do over indulge. Why are your set of rules better.

HollowTalk · 02/04/2018 11:50

I think the talk of fasting, along with other things you've said, make an eating disorder sound very likely, OP. You shouldn't feel like you're about to pass out if you're on the blood sugar diet - you shouldn't feel like that on any diet.

It might be worth keeping a record of what you're eating and going to see a doctor for a check up.

IntelligentYetIndecisive · 02/04/2018 11:53

This 'up and down', yo-yo dieting isn't healthy.

You seem to swing between 'dieting' (restricting calories until you feel faint) and 'eating normally' which seems to involve bingeing until you go up a size and then 'diet' again.

Your friends may have a point, you need to talk to someone.

www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk

Shednik · 02/04/2018 11:53

Impossible for us to say.
Most people with an Eating Disorder are not underweight and you do sound very rigid and excessively concerned.

But you're not going to get an informed opinion here...why don't you try Beat (the Eating Disorders charity) website.

I guess it depends how much your fixation with weight impacts your life.

Original poster
TheParisofPeople · 02/04/2018 12:02

‘You're being critical of those that do over indulge’

Um yes? And why not? You think people stuffing their faces with empty sugar is a better set of rules? Our society has completely forgotten what moderation and self restraint even mean.

OP posts:
puppower · 02/04/2018 12:03

The way you talk about food would concern me if I was a friend/relative.

GeorgeTheHippo · 02/04/2018 12:06

I think a lot depends on what you mean by "I fast sometimes".

Original poster
TheParisofPeople · 02/04/2018 12:06

‘It's just food! You can eat chocolate and not be 'pigging out', it's possible to just enjoy that foodstuff for what it is’

But it’s not a foodstuff, it’s literally just sugar. No nutritional value, fucks up your insulin so you pile on even more weight. It’s poison for the body, how can people enjoy putting dirty food in themselves?!

OP posts:
Awwlookatmybabyspider · 02/04/2018 12:07

I am a hungry Horace. I'll hold my hands up. Anything that doesn't move in eat.
It's my body. I won't have anyone dictate to me what I can or can't eat.

sourpatchkid · 02/04/2018 12:07

And now you sound angry in defence of a simple statement

It's not your behaviour that's suggesting a possible problem - it's your thoughts and feelings about it.

PotteringAlong · 02/04/2018 12:08

You sound like you’ve got an eating disorder to me...

sourpatchkid · 02/04/2018 12:10

Oh my ... "it's poison for the body"?

Now can you see why people are concerned? That's not a normal attitude.

(Eat chocolate, don't eat it .. whatever but it's not poison)

expatinscotland · 02/04/2018 12:10

'But it’s not a foodstuff, it’s literally just sugar. No nutritional value, fucks up your insulin so you pile on even more weight. It’s poison for the body, how can people enjoy putting dirty food in themselves?!'

Hmm It's food. It's not 'just sugar'. You were doing so well till you got to 'dirty food'.

RoadToRivendell · 02/04/2018 12:10

I'd never get involved with a friend's eating habits. Neither would I be alarmed at someone not overindulging as proscribed over a holiday. Pretty ridiculous.

Butterfly1066 · 02/04/2018 12:10

You sound absolutely judgemental to be honest and not very kind

puppower · 02/04/2018 12:11

dirty food?

Original poster
TheParisofPeople · 02/04/2018 12:11

I get why people don’t want to be dictated to I really do, I just think if you defending gorging on junk there’s something wrong with that? That’s how we’ve ended up in an obesity crisis.

OP posts:
WazFlimFlam · 02/04/2018 12:11

You sound obsessed with sugar. To the point of defensiveness. That is very different to just trying to eat healthily.

Birdsgottafly · 02/04/2018 12:11

"Um yes? And why not? You think people stuffing their faces with empty sugar is a better set of rules? Our society has completely forgotten what moderation and self restraint even mean."

There's always been overindulgence at Easter, granted it was after not eating certain foods, but that didn't mean fasting. I was watching Marry Berry "around the World at Easter" and some Cultures have the feast, including alcohol, in the Church at Midnight. Children also drink alcohol.

Your opinion sounds as though there may be an issue. It's easy to latch on to a rise in Obesity and use it to see everyone else as having the issue.

expatinscotland · 02/04/2018 12:12

Erm, I don't 'gorge on junk food', I enjoy a range of food in moderation and am not obese.

Birdsgottafly · 02/04/2018 12:12

"I just think if you defending gorging on junk there’s something wrong with that? That’s how we’ve ended up in an obesity crisis."

It isn't.

puppower · 02/04/2018 12:13

Are you looking for advice re your friends opinions or a debate on the obesity crisis?

Original poster
TheParisofPeople · 02/04/2018 12:14

And I totally hold my hands up to being judgemental about certain food, or like having a negative attitude towards it. It’s what I know and grew up with. Just watching people eat makes me freak out, that doesn’t mean I think they’re bad people.

OP posts: