To think that £150 is a lot to spend on a handbag?

[NooNooHead]

I’m really wanting to treat myself to a Michael Kors bag on ebay or in the sale, but I’m currently 28 weeks pregnant with DC2 but am out of work and being very kindly funded by my DP (despite trying to look for work for about 5 months unsuccessfully...)

My DP are usually very kind and generous and offer to buy me something v nice, up to the value of £100. Not wanting to be frivolous, I’ve seen a Michael Kors handbag that I really like on Brandalley.co.uk that I’d like which is £185 - it is a lot more than the birthday budget, but I would try and fund the rest from selling things on ebay and having some money from other family members towards it too.

My DP didn’t think much of my idea about the handbag, and would rather I didn’t spend my birthday money on something that they don’t think is a worthwhile present. I’m very grateful for everything they do and give me, and I don’t want to look a gift horse in the mouth if they are offering money towards a different present, but AMA bit disappointed that I can’t buy what I really want for my birthday.

I’m probably going to come across as ungrateful or spoilt saying all this, and this is the last thing I want to be. Please tell me to get a grip on and be more grateful for being offered such a generous present, and think rationally about what would be a useful gift for my birthday. AIBU in feeling a bit unsure about how I should react and what I should buy now?

Your parents can obviously afford to get you a gift up to £100, so let them. A lot of people get birthday presents, so don't feel guilty about it. It's their money, their choice and probably their pleasure. Again though, I wouldn't ask for more than what they have offered, they are already being generous. Also, they will probably be helping to buy for the baby too, so asking for more does smack of entitlement. Some people on here are telling you to get the bag, others are telling you to put it towards things for the baby, I'm advocating for something in the middle. Get yourself something within the budget, then get saving for the baby.

Oh my, in my richer days, I spent £500 on a Pre loved Christian Dior Granville bag. It was fab, I wore it every day. I do have a parchant for designer handbags, I do wear them a lot. They look good. I woukd put a little money aside each month towards the rest of it, and go treat yiurself.

Don't get the bag. You can't afford it. Bluntness has said some wise things. Plus MK bags are so so chavvy. Everytime I see them they are carried by certain types, turns me off completely. Save the money for the baby, he/she will bring you more joy than any bag would.

I am well aware of it coming across as entitled - although I think my DB, despite all his illnesses and misfortune, was the most entitled person I know and not that grateful either, but I’m now speaking ill of the dead so I will stop there. Having supported myself ok for the past 10 years, and been in employment steadily for most of that time, I can say that I’ve not always been asking people to bail me out for everything. It’s just the circumstances that I am in now that have meant a bit of help from others. I’m more than capable of standing on my own two feet, but health problems and circumstances haven’t helped in recent years that much.

Hopefully things will improve and I will be on work again by the end of the year.

Aeroflot,op is unemployed,living with parents.how is she going to pop some money aside?
When you saved were you unemployed ,pg and getting financial support from parents?

CertainlyChoco - very wise words from you too. yes, the baby will bring my more joy than any material possessions ever could. I’m forever grateful for having the chance to have another child and something I have wanted for the past 7 years.

£150!

Last summer I brought 10 assorted Radley bags at a huge discount from Debenhams. They added up to the cost of 3 as a surprise for DW (no occasion but it had been a long summer and she deserved a treat). (A mixture of handbacks and rucksacks.)

Now, I expected her to keep 1 to 3 of them and then I could return the rest. What I hadn't figured out (silly bloke really) that DD was at home from uni!

Got home from work to them both sitting around the coffee table almost swimming in them!

DS was also at home and looked at me like I was mad cause he had had to put up with them swapping them between each other for most of the afternoon.

Not one went back! All in all they cost about £300 which isn't too bad!

Yes I did, at the moment I am a STAHM, on disability benefits for my two DC with SN, CB, just got DH income, I do put a little money aside for something I like. I can afford to, but op might not be in that position. But that aside, that money is for her gift from her parents, so she can get something within that value.

LipstickHandbagCoffee no, I’m not living with my parents - my DH and I have our own home.

NooNoo when things are better and you’re back at work and have the money spare then buy the bag, now isn’t the time but when it is, you buy it and you enjoy it. I hope things improve for you x

Not commenting on your financial situation and whether it’s a wise purchase at the moment but to give you another perspective, with a baby the only bag I get use these days is a nappy bag. It’s too much hassle to carry two bags around everywhere so my purse, phone, keys etc. get chucked in the changing bag too. The only time I get to use my nice bags are the 2 or so times a month I meet a friend for a drink or if DH and I get a babysitter and go out for dinner. So whilst I was considering asking for a splurge bag for my upcoming 30th I’ve shelved it for now and am requesting earrings instead!

I don’t think that much is too much to spend on a bag at all.

Op sorry I misunderstood
Aeroflot I don’t think go for it is good advice when you’re unemployed,skint and pg
There needs to be a reality check,not a I want it,I’ll go for it response

I work,and if I want a handbag that I can’t afford I save up. I don’t go for it at all
I delay gratification until I can afford the bag or I chose an alternative I can afford

noonoo, is this your first baby? I’m guessing it is because I don’t think many people with experience of a baby and toddler would get an £185 bag for use in their first years.

Whatever bag you have for the next few years is going to get BATTERED. It’s going to get caught in the pram, chewed on, dribbled on, pulled about by sticky hands, have half sucked sweets and leaky bottles and cups shoved in it, have half eaten bits of fruit shoved in it, smelly nappies in bags shoved in, it will be emptied out and refilled, used as a toy and once, in my case, used as a sledge on the stairs. Bags are like catnip to little kids, they love them.

It also might well not be practical as you often find bags you loved before are a pain when you have a baby as they’re not big enough for everything you need or are difficult to hold easily when pushing a pram or holding a baby.

A bag really is something I’d hold off on until the baby was here and then get a cheap, practical one. There’s no point spending all that money on something which will either get ruined quickly or hardly ever used.

I’d say clothes, shoes, hair whatever. But an expensive bag with a tiny kid is a bad idea.

I don’t honestly think you will be using a handbag for quite some time, with a new baby, so I would get something you can enjoy now.

Bags are like catnip to little kids, they love them. Hilarious and v v true
I’ve had sweaty,dribbly,pukey,tomatoey hands rummage through my bags
I was in a meeting,looked in bag for pen and in the search pulled out a scabby half eaten mouldy apple
Said scabby half eaten apple rolled across table,fell onto floor with a damp squelch
My kids constantly are/were rooting about in my handbags.couldn’t keep out

That's a lot for a MK bag isn't it? I thought they were usually well under £100?

My Michael Kors bag isn't my most expensive bag, but it was around $300.

I don't think £150 is a lot for a bag, no, if you're in the position to afford it.

Buy the fucking handbag!

I don’t think it’s much to spend on a handbag. I regularly spend 10 times that. However I can easily afford my purchases. You can’t.

If you’d need to scrimp and save and sell stuff just to afford part of the cost of this bag, you really can’t afford it. In your position you really don’t want to be doing that kind of thing for luxury purchases. There’ll be plenty of little unexpected costs hitting you when you have your baby. Save your sellable items for when you really need them.

Please buy it. It's not chavvy or selfish, people are very bitter.

It's all relative isn't it. I have many bags, they are my investments, ranging from 5k for a full sizenchanel to a few MK for work trips (they are remarkably robust and cope with being battered around very well) I had a fanta explosion in mine and it was good as new after a wash. Please get it for yourself, its the last chance you will have for a while.

£1.85 is too much to spend on a handbag if you only have £1

It's not chavvy or selfish, people are very bitter.

Yeah, we’re all bitter because none of us can have a Michael Kors bag. You’ve got it. 🙄

YABU to buy a handbag on eBay. Chances are it will be a fake! I own designer handbags, please don't buy them from anywhere other than the official website or places like Debenhams. You will end up being scammed.

It’s not a lot to spend on a bag, and upgrading the value of your birthday gift would be fine normally. However, it sounds like you’re financially dependent on your parents, so I can see their point. If you add £85 to their birthday present fund, then it’s ultimately an extra £85 that they’re going to have to give you for practical things and living expenses.

Ok then then about snooty and rude? Also describes you. I thought chavvy was a banned word on MN. Let people have what they like. Sneering just makes you look sad.