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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

That a 40 year old man child is pathetic not endearing?

206 replies

RoryAndLogan · 19/03/2018 08:53

My cousins husband has posted online about meal prep she has done for him. She's going away with work for 3 days, and has filled the fridge with Tupperware labelled 'breakfast', 'lunch' and 'dinner' for each day.

His post was 'wife goals! No going hungry for me!'

He's 39 years old.

She's mentioned in the past how if she's ever away he will just eat pizza if she doesn't prepare his meals as he can't do anything else and talks about it like it's endearing and sweet Hmm

AIBU that this isn't at all endearing, but pathetic?

OP posts:
anneoneill · 19/03/2018 08:54

I can see how this must be a harrowing time for you OP, my sympathies.

IanRushesInadequateFlushes · 19/03/2018 08:57

It sounds as if she likes it, ie likes thinking that she’s indispensable.

It wouldn’t do it for me, but they sound happy, so YaBU to judge!

MissPiggysKarateChop · 19/03/2018 08:57

Crappy morning Anne? I feel like that too before my coffee.Smile

Personally I wouldn't do it (although I might do some for the kids) but if it works for them, some people like to feel needed, maybe she does too.

anneoneill · 19/03/2018 08:59

@misspiggyskaratechop, dreadful morning. So bad in fact that I might complain online about my cousin's perfectly safe and loving marriage that's got fuck all to do with me.

80sMum · 19/03/2018 08:59

That's unusual for nowadays and does seem a bit odd in this day and age. But was the norm in my dad's generation. Roles were very much more defined then - women did childcare, cooking, shopping and cleaning; men worked and earned the money, managed the finances, did DIY etc.

missyB1 · 19/03/2018 09:00

Bit weird and embarrassing to boast about it on social media, personally I'd be keeping quiet about that!

CapnHaddock · 19/03/2018 09:00

It's pathetic.

CurbsideProphet · 19/03/2018 09:01

YANBU. I couldn't be in a relationship with a man who was so lazy.

Trills · 19/03/2018 09:02

YANBU that's pathetic.

But if they both like this then they can behave like this together and at least they won't "ruin a pair".

ItMustBeBedtimeSurely · 19/03/2018 09:02

Yeah, I would judge them both too op. I'd
It is utterly pathetic on his part.

redcarbluecar · 19/03/2018 09:03

Lol. I’d love someone to do this for me. I live alone so it would be a bit weird if it did happen though.

ALittleAubergine · 19/03/2018 09:03

It's not for me but if they're happy with it then let them get on with it. It's not hurting anyone.

MissPiggysKarateChop · 19/03/2018 09:04

@misspiggyskaratechop, dreadful morning. So bad in fact that I might complain online about my cousin's perfectly safe and loving marriage that's got fuck all to do with me.

@anneoneill FTR I do agree with you and I hope you haven't really had a bad morning. Grin and if you have I hope it gets better.

elQuintoConyo · 19/03/2018 09:06

Woman shows husband love. Gets slated for it.

Years ago i was away from DH at Christmas. Before i left i made 2L of tomato soup that he loved because it tasted 'just like' his mum's (RIP). He was spending Christmas with the rest of his family (Fil, several Bils and Sils plus their partners plus their dc, about 15 people in total) and i knew he was going to be very bloody well fed, but i wanted him to feel that although i couldn't be with him, i could be in his stomach Grin He got some rude comments from his brothers and a couple of raised eyebrows from sisters/Sils, but i didn't make the soup for them.

Live and let live.*

  • i'm aware if we all did this, there'd be no MN Grin
GwenStaceyRocks · 19/03/2018 09:07

Meh - she likes cooking for him. He appreciates it. It's not what I would do but it's their relationship dynamic.

livefornaps · 19/03/2018 09:07

Lol, everyone here is spitting bile

She's just watched one too many "meal prep" videos on Facebook.

It's not pandering, it's "meal prep" dahlings and it's aaaaaallll the raaaaage

HuskyMcClusky · 19/03/2018 09:09

Posting ‘wife goals’ on social media is what makes me 🤮

anneoneill · 19/03/2018 09:09

Honestly, how dare OP's cousin act in defiance of OP's wishes? What's the point in feminism if we can't dictate how other women behave?

Shedmicehugh1 · 19/03/2018 09:09

She finds it endearing and sweet. Each to their own.

livefornaps · 19/03/2018 09:10

I'll have what he's having

AtrociousCircumstance · 19/03/2018 09:10

Yeah it’s a bit pathetic and so reinforcing of oppressive gender role bollocks that it would make me roll my eyes too.

Their business of course Grin

CherryCi · 19/03/2018 09:10

I might do this for my DH if I was away for a few days because he works ridiculously long shifts, and wouldn’t have the time to cook proper meals.

I’d be a bit Hmm if he posted that on social media though.

altiara · 19/03/2018 09:11

@redcarbluecar - spat my tea out at that!

kubex · 19/03/2018 09:11

Maybe he likes eating pizza!

TERFragetteCity · 19/03/2018 09:12

I am away for 3 days. There is nothing prepared in our fridge for my OH. It is because he is a grown man and I reminded him of this yesterday.

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