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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Colleague left me stranded in the snow

469 replies

pissedoffnurse101 · 02/03/2018 16:42

Work alongside a colleague, I currently have no car and have been one of the only few people to get into work with all this bad snow. Today, we got the go ahead to go home and she has dropped me off to the closest train station. There is one train showing up as running in the opposite direction, no staff here at the station and no one available to collect me.

AIBU to think she could have driven the 20 minutes to drop me home (she has a 4x4)???

OP posts:
Nicknacky · 02/03/2018 16:44

Did you ask her to? It adds on 40 mins to her journey so she maybe didn’t have time to run you home?

And did you check the trains were running before she dropped you at the train station?

falsepriest · 02/03/2018 16:44

Where did you ask/suggest/usually get (to be) dropped off?

ScreamingValenta · 02/03/2018 16:45

Oh, dear OP! What are you going to do? Awful situation for you.

WRT your AIBU, did you ask her if she could do this, or did you just ask for a lift to the station? I assume she wasn't to know the trains weren't running. It's hard for me to agree she WBU from what you have said so far.

lostmyfeckingkeysagain · 02/03/2018 16:49

Presumably she dropped you off outside the station rather than coming in with you so how was she to know your train had been cancelled?

NaiceBiscuits · 02/03/2018 16:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PhelanThePain · 02/03/2018 16:52

Who decided you would go to the trains station? Who checked the trains were running before leaving?

Jamboree05 · 02/03/2018 16:52

So she didn't leave you stranded at all.....?!

She could have just abandoned you at work, you know. At least she took you to the station.

AdoraBell · 02/03/2018 16:54

Not sure if YABU, depends on the conversation. What are you going to do now, can you phone someone, or is there a nearby hotel? I know people may not have extra money for a hotel but if it’s your only option it’s better than being out if you cannot get home

FunkyCatsFiestyStats · 02/03/2018 16:55

To be honest, YABU... a bit. Your colleague has helped you out by getting you to the station. It isn't her fault there are no trains (or that she dropped you despite this). You getting home isn't your colleague's responsibility.

ChickensGoBoak · 02/03/2018 16:56

Yabu. How was she to know the trains were cancelled (...and did you not take some personal responsibility and check before going to the station?). And depending on how bad the weather is, why should she take potentially hours out of her day and risk her personal safety for someone who seems to be fairly ungrateful?

NoSquirrels · 02/03/2018 16:56

How did you get to work - via train? I assume you accepted the lift on the basis it was to the nearest station? If you’d wanted a lift all the way home you could have asked nicely- with reasons e.g. I’m concerned the trains won’t be running.

Did you ask to wait outside while you checked?

I think it’s not unreasonable to want a lift home, but it would be unreasonable to stew about it if you didn’t ask.

Totostee · 02/03/2018 16:59

Do you usual go by train into work? If so did you check before leaving work online or ask her to wait until you could check in the station?

Haffdonga · 02/03/2018 17:00

Why didn't you check the trains were running? It's really not your colleague's responsibility to do that. Confused

SmashedMug · 02/03/2018 17:00

Did you do that thing where you act like you're fine getting the train and reassure her that you were fine when really she's meant to read your mind and give you a lift anyway?

hairycoo · 02/03/2018 17:00

I think YA(both)BU. You should have checked the trains were running, but I often give colleagues a lift, and would have realised myself that trains may have been cancelled and would have said to colleague to go check whilst I waited in the car and to just phone my mobile to let me know. Id never just drop a colleague off in those circumstances without making sure.

Namechangetempissue · 02/03/2018 17:01

Was she aware that the train station wasn't running? I presume not seeing as you got out there! Could you not have asked and offered petrol money?

Letseatgrandma · 02/03/2018 17:01

I would have left you at work with that attitude! Why is her responsibility to get you home just because she has a 4x4?!

Presumably she has bought, insured, taxed and maintained said car for her own convenience, not to act as a taxi driver to you!

20 minutes to drop you home (probably double that in this shocking weather) and then the same again for her to get home! Why should she-she’s a colleague, not your mum. Apologies though, if it’s written into her contract that she must deliver you to your doorstep each day. If that’s the case, I take it all back.

How did you get in to work?

Get a bus or a taxi home?

Shoxfordian · 02/03/2018 17:01

Yeah you really could have checked the trains

ApplesTheHare · 02/03/2018 17:02

You're not her responsibility so I'm not really sure what your issue is? You could have checked the trains and/or asked her to drive you home.

PlateOfBiscuits · 02/03/2018 17:03

Get a taxi.

What would you do if she didn’t drive?

SlothMama · 02/03/2018 17:04

Did you actually ask her or check that the trains were running first before she gave you a lift?

You have made yourself stranded not her, you should have planned your journey better in this weather.

TheDailyMailLovesTheEUReally · 02/03/2018 17:04

How did you get to work this morning? To be fair an additional 20 minutes is an extra 40 minutes for her because she has to do it round-trip. Plus it depends on what the roads are like in your area. Where I am journeys are taking far longer because the roads are treacherous - a journey that would normally take me 10 minutes took over half an hour this morning.

So without knowing more information I don't know if YABU or not.

BerylStreep · 02/03/2018 17:05

I've got a 4 wheel drive car. It's still very difficult to drive in snow and I wouldn't drive an additional 20 minutes each direction (which in this weather could be more likely 1 hour each direction) unnecessarily.

Mummyoflittledragon · 02/03/2018 17:05

It sounds rubbish. But you need to look after yourself. So what are you going to do now?

DarklyDreamingDexter · 02/03/2018 17:05

A 20 min journey in snowy conditions could be 40+ minute journey (one way) in the current conditions, so a long detour for her. She was doing you a favour getting you to the station. It's not her responsibility to get you home or check times.

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