Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Facebook related to warn you all! Would you be offended?

223 replies

BlueNeighbourhood1 · 13/01/2018 21:50

So I'm a member of several local groups - Because of where I live it's all villages and I'm part of each of their Facebook groups.

Tonight in one of them a post appears. Basically a young lad (about 20-23) had taken a picture of a girl he didn't know and the back of her in a shop. She was wearing an equestrian centre hoody. His caption to the post was "Feel sorry for the horse she rides" or something similar to that. The girl had seen the post and she had screenshot and posted to the local group saying how hurt she was.

I'm in two minds about it - I certainly think it's fat-shaming and not to be condoned at all. But people jumped on it saying they were going to tell his employers, and get him fired. He wasn't even a member of the group to go and apologise and instead had friends defending him the whole time. I'm sure he thought he was just being clever and doing it for likes and banter but he doesn't realise the impact he could've had on the girls life either.

Do you guys think everyone overreacted or he deserves whatever comes his way?

OP posts:
Grimbles · 14/01/2018 16:24

I've been horse riding a couple of times. It's bloody hard work - it's not just a nice sit down whilst the horse trots around. I felt like I'd done a full on work-out after a 30 min ride.

My clumsy point being that this girl was probably far fitter than the scrote trying to shame her.

Louiselouie0890 · 14/01/2018 16:29

What an absolute nasty twat. He's a grown man. Deserves everything he gets. Disgusting

Smeaton · 14/01/2018 16:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tiptopteepe · 14/01/2018 16:38

Im glad he is worried he will lose his job but sadly i doubt he will. Hopefully this will teach him a lesson tho. Bullying is never okay and that was bullying. People arent overreacting about it, good for them for supporting that girl!

Hygge · 14/01/2018 16:43

He's a grown man at 20-23yo.

He's old enough to have a job, a fiancee, and a baby.

He's old enough to know that he has responsibilities and that acting like this has consequences.

He's too old to be having a nasty dig at a woman because of her weight. He thought he could get away with it because she's a stranger but he's found out that nobody really stays anonymous on Facebook.

If he's scared for his job and worried about how he can take care of his fiancee and baby as a result of his own actions, perhaps he'll think twice before he body-shames a stranger on the internet in future.

Halie · 14/01/2018 16:59

He completely deserves it. It's time people realized that it's not okay to take pictures of strangers just so that they can post them online and laugh at them. Literally anyone of us could become a 'meme' or a viral video and ridiculed online now that every eejit carries a camera phone.

Tara336 · 14/01/2018 17:19

The downside of social media, in the past someone would think something then move on with their day..l now a photo is taken, posted and comments made. It’s nasty and it’s unessary he should have thought about what he was doing, as he didn’t then it’s tough I’m afraid.

ConferencePear · 14/01/2018 17:22

I'm still waiting for someone to tell me how handsome and successful he is that it gives him the arrogance to think this is OK.

FrancisCrawford · 14/01/2018 17:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

poetryinmotion13 · 14/01/2018 17:42

cafenoir This is exactly why what this man did was so potentially damaging. How si your niece doing now?

HelenaDove · 14/01/2018 17:55

Im bloody relieved that i lost my weight between 2002 and 2004 just on the cusp of social media.

This knob has to take the consequences of his own actions but im not surprised to see the victim blaming.

poetryinmotion13 · 14/01/2018 17:58

HelenaDove I know. Sadly, there are people on MN who seem to only care about bullying if it happens to a protected minority. Fat people are seen as fair game, unfortunately.

cafenoirbiscuit · 14/01/2018 22:21

poetry she’s doing well thanks. Riding is a bloody expensive business and SIL is beyond skint. But I’ve never seen DN more engaged than she is with horses, her outbursts of rage which started at 2 are all gone, she has mates and for the first time is part of a community of nice folk.

BakedIllaska · 15/01/2018 12:41

Has he lost his job yet?

StrandedStarfish · 15/01/2018 17:29

It would have been nice if there was an apology to the young woman

crazycatgal · 15/01/2018 17:31

He won't lose him job but I'm glad that the pathetic little prick has been worrying about the repercussions all day. Anyone with an ounce of intelligence knows not to post stuff like this online.

kaytee87 · 15/01/2018 17:38

Why oh why do people put their employers name on their Facebook page and then do stupid, nasty shit like this??

The company could have a good reason to sack him as there is likely a clause in his contract about 'bringing the company into disrepute'. If they weren't named on his profile then his employers wouldn't be linked to it.

He's a twat, and a stupid one at that.

Liketoshop · 15/01/2018 17:41

Why start with so? What ever happened to freedom of speech? The lad had a democratic right to voice an opinion. So. What.

kaytee87 · 15/01/2018 17:46

@Liketoshop freedom of speech does not stretch to taking a picture of someone without their permission, putting it in the public eye and making disparaging remarks about said person.

So many people talk about freedom of speech without having the faintest clue what it means.

ConferencePear · 15/01/2018 17:48

The lad had a democratic right to voice an opinion.

Of course he does, but he needs to use better judgement when exercising it. The only point of his photo appears to have been to poke fun at someone who, for all he knew, might be a vulnerable person.

crazycatgal · 15/01/2018 17:54

Since when does freedom of speech involve taking a sneaky picture of another person, posting it online and making nasty comments?

edam · 15/01/2018 17:55

Freedom of speech means everyone has the right to say what they think about spiteful little idiots like this guy

Beezley · 15/01/2018 17:57

I wonder how he would react if someone posted that about his girlfriend?! Sounds like he can dish it out but can t take it when people tell him he is an arsehole. That sort of spiteful disgusting behaviour on social media can have devastating results. I have always hated bullying and nasty comments by people who haven't got the bottle to say it to someone's face. When the tables get turned these so called funny people don't know what to do and start pleading oh I didn't mean it and I'm sorry and I've got a family and new baby..... Well mate think on before you do it again. What goes around comes around.

Tapandgo · 15/01/2018 18:09

He is vile - no sympathy for him

arlene123 · 15/01/2018 18:13

Everyone is talking about him, his job, his reputation. As the mother of teen girl who once had a similar comment made about her, who now has eating, image and mood disorders (she is actually stunning, size 10 and highly intelligent) She self harms, starves herself and has attempted suicide several times.its a fight to keep her alive long enough to for her to get well. All it can take is a stupid comment from an idiot like this to tip the balance!! He’s not a ‘young lad’ of 12/13 he’s a grown man and a father!! People need to know that actions like this can kill

Swipe left for the next trending thread