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AIBU?

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Original poster

Facebook related to warn you all! Would you be offended?

223 replies

BlueNeighbourhood1 · 13/01/2018 21:50

So I'm a member of several local groups - Because of where I live it's all villages and I'm part of each of their Facebook groups.

Tonight in one of them a post appears. Basically a young lad (about 20-23) had taken a picture of a girl he didn't know and the back of her in a shop. She was wearing an equestrian centre hoody. His caption to the post was "Feel sorry for the horse she rides" or something similar to that. The girl had seen the post and she had screenshot and posted to the local group saying how hurt she was.

I'm in two minds about it - I certainly think it's fat-shaming and not to be condoned at all. But people jumped on it saying they were going to tell his employers, and get him fired. He wasn't even a member of the group to go and apologise and instead had friends defending him the whole time. I'm sure he thought he was just being clever and doing it for likes and banter but he doesn't realise the impact he could've had on the girls life either.

Do you guys think everyone overreacted or he deserves whatever comes his way?

OP posts:
bfgdreamtree · 14/01/2018 13:00

Why would she screenshot it and post it for more people to see? Thats just weird.

FreddieClaryHorshieLion · 14/01/2018 13:00

The obvious answer is that because we like to think of ourselves as respectful and decent. Be the bigger person. Don't be a dick. Don't sink to their level etc

Shallow and imo often hypocritical advice, meant to make ourselves feel better when we do nothing and let others walk all over us.

"I hope he’s made to regret this."

All because of a fat joke?
No, because he targeted someone online and used them to make a fat joke. He can make as many fat jokes as he wants. As longs as he doesn’t involve other people.

Are you fat or just quite vengeful?

Vengeful.

kennyFromTheBlock · 14/01/2018 13:07

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GreenTulips · 14/01/2018 13:09

*Today 13:00 bfgdreamtree

Why would she screenshot it and post it for more people to see? Thats just weird

No it isn't - she's showing her friends what a dick he's being - she has a right to stand up to these idiots as much as anyone else

She would've been hurt by his comments and anyone else sticking up for him

FreddieClaryHorshieLion · 14/01/2018 13:13

And weakness isn’t an attractive quality imo...

Out of interest, how fat was this person and has anyone considered that horses really aren't supposed to be ridden anyway. It does them enourmous damage.

This however is very true.

Booboobooboo84 · 14/01/2018 13:15

Christ this guy is getting a fast lesson in how to not be a complete bellend.

He could lose his job. bringing the company into disrepute is gross misconduct in most standard contracts now. If his is a public facing business then I imagine he probably will lose his job. He can’t blame anyone for that other than himself.

I feel for the poor girl who was fatshamed and has behaved with dignity. He apologised and she accepted and deleted her post about it. Not her responsibility if he subsequently faces financial hardship while potentially looking for a new job. She didn’t ask to have her picture taken and her image disrespected on the Internet.

kennyFromTheBlock · 14/01/2018 13:19

FreddieClaryHorshieLion

Who's been weak?

Is it not possible he was simply worried about the horse but bloodthirsty facebookers and fora-users have missed the point and want blood for "fat shaming" a girl who more than likely damages a horse by sitting on it.

Booboobooboo84 · 14/01/2018 13:20

Fuck off kenny worries about the horse? I’ve heard it fucking all now.

IamLucyBarton · 14/01/2018 13:22

Ahahahaha Kenny. Big round of applause for succeeding in having us all on.

Booboobooboo84 · 14/01/2018 13:22

The average horse can carry ten per cent of their body weight so unless it’s a Shetland pony she was riding then comfortably 20 stone can be carried.

FreddieClaryHorshieLion · 14/01/2018 13:24

I doubt it. Talking to her would have probably been a bit more beneficial (if this was what he intended).

No one (in this instance). But acting like this however often is:

The obvious answer is that because we like to think of ourselves as respectful and decent. Be the bigger person. Don't be a dick. Don't sink to their level etc

happiestcamper · 14/01/2018 13:24

She was prob a size 16 at most. Not massively big at all

FreddieClaryHorshieLion · 14/01/2018 13:26

Anyhow:
She responded in an imo dignified manner, forgave him (and could now lean back and see how others react to this).

That’s the perfect response imo.

Aeroflotgirl · 14/01/2018 13:31

He is a grown adult man who shoukd have had more sense. Serves him right!

Estellanpip · 14/01/2018 13:35

Not engaging with you kenny, sorry.

Aeroflotgirl · 14/01/2018 13:39

Nice people don't say things like that, he was not a nice man.

BashStreetKid · 14/01/2018 13:39

All I have said is that it was a joke (albeit one you didn't appreciate) and that he and his family don't deserve to lose their income and security over it.

Kenny, you must have an extremely strange idea about what a joke is. No-one with half a brain could "appreciate" it. It was a blatant attempt at bullying a stranger, nothing more.

kennyFromTheBlock · 14/01/2018 13:43

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kennyFromTheBlock · 14/01/2018 13:46

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poetryinmotion13 · 14/01/2018 14:14

how fat was this person

Does this make a difference though? Are you suggesting that slightly overweight people should not be shamed but really fat people should be? KennyFromTheBlock

To be fair, when I read the OP, although I was disgusted by the man's behaviour towards the girl, I did think that going to his employer was a bit of an overkill. I think the man (I refuse to say lad) should be reprimanded publicly but not to lose his job UNLESS his job means he is working with children or vulnerable people. And I am an obese person (due to legitimate issues I have) who has regeularly been mocked in the streets and physically threatened by strangers and even abused by a family member due to my size.

I absolutely agree with the poster (apologies, cannot recall your name) who questioned whether shaming a black or disabled person would be ok. I really do not understand how it is considered ok to shame fat people but not other minorities.

poetryinmotion13 · 14/01/2018 14:15

I doubt the girl deserved it But of course she didn't! no one deserves to be shamed for something they have limited control over, like their appearance

clashesBreakOut · 14/01/2018 14:20

@poetry

What difference does it make if her works with children of vulnerable people?

"Fat people" (your words) are not a minority anymore.

Booboobooboo84 · 14/01/2018 14:22

The fact of the matter kenny is that this kind of shit didn’t use to be a big deal because ‘banter’ was acceptable. Now it is a big deal people are sick of people being offensive fuckwits and then them hiding behind it just being ‘banter’

Aeroflotgirl · 14/01/2018 14:32

Wow kenny you sound as bad as he is. There is no excuse for his behaviour. Taking a picture of her With her Riding school jumper on, and posting it to a public suite with the intention of publically humiliating her. Not an off the cuff remark to a friend(which woukd also have not been good).

Aeroflotgirl · 14/01/2018 14:36

I think kenny, is a GF. If he felt tgat sorry for the horse he can join the RCPCA or an horse charity.

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