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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask if you would re-marry your DP, knowing now what you didn't back then?

484 replies

constantchange · 09/01/2018 08:27

I thought this would make for an interesting thread.--

If you could go back to the year you married your husband/wife, would you still marry them, knowing everything you do about them now that you didn't back then?

OP posts:
PastaOfMuppets · 09/01/2018 08:28

Without any hesitation whatsoever.

Crumbs1 · 09/01/2018 08:32

Absolutely without hesitation.

thegreylady · 09/01/2018 08:33

Absolutely yes, no hesitation whatsoever.

Beckyboo123 · 09/01/2018 08:33

Yes definitely, we have been together 12 years and although we’re both completely different now (grown up) I would not change a thing or do anything differently.

FuckOffDailyMailFools · 09/01/2018 08:36

Yes, of course! I don’t think many married couples would say otherwise, unless they’re having some problems.

There are lots of things I’d love to go back in time and do differently, but marrying Dh isn’t one of them.

Ethelswith · 09/01/2018 08:36

No

Don't want to elaborate too much, but his attitude to the truth is more flexible than I had realised.

But I still want the DC

MothershipG · 09/01/2018 08:38

I'd go back a bit further, split up with my ex sooner and marry DH sooner and have babies sooner.

SparkyTheCat · 09/01/2018 08:40

Would do it all again, only sooner.

streetlife70s · 09/01/2018 08:44

I’d have done it a year earlier. In a flash.

FluttershysCutieMarkTheHerald · 09/01/2018 08:45

Definitely, would not change one thing about dw.

NineFortySixPM · 09/01/2018 08:47

100%! He’s got even better looking with age as well as still being one of the best people I know.

But surely this thread only has 2 outcomes and just shows who has a happy marriage vs those who either have already split or wish they had?

soupey1 · 09/01/2018 08:48

Absolutely definitely - almost 30 years later we are still as happy now as we were then and I can't imagine life without him!!

tenbob · 09/01/2018 08:48

Absolutely

I would probably hunt him down years earlier and force us together rather than waiting for our accidental meeting

TalkinPeace · 09/01/2018 08:51

Yes.
Been with him over 33 years - still sit watching telly and laughing at each others bad jokes.

Mulberry72 · 09/01/2018 08:51

Absolutely, we’ve been married 13 very, very happy years. We’ve had our ups and downs of course but we very rarely argue, I can count the number of times on one hand.

I love him with all my heart and I know 100% that he feels exactly the same.

splendide · 09/01/2018 08:52

Yes I would although perhaps I wouldn’t if I’d known then that he was never really going to have a job. Actually it’s been ok and I’ve done all the earning but I think if I’d known that at 19 (when my earning prospects looked pretty shonky) I might not have stuck around.

NorksAreMessy · 09/01/2018 08:52

Yes yes yes.

30 years married this year and I love him to bits

Judashascomeintosomemoney · 09/01/2018 08:52

Yes and, like pps, the one thing I’d change is I’d have met and married him sooner.

userabcname · 09/01/2018 08:52

Yes. Wish I would have done it sooner and had DS sooner tbh.

ethelfleda · 09/01/2018 08:53

Yes. We have been together 11 years - married 2 years this year. And on top of everything else, I have recently discovered what a wonderful father he is so I love him even more now.

deptfordgirl · 09/01/2018 08:58

Definitely. He's far kinder and more patient then I ever realised when I married him and we are closer now we have been through some ups and downs.

AtlanticWaves · 09/01/2018 09:01

Yes.

But I'd have waited another year or 2 before DC. And I'd have made him do much more of the childcare aspect with DS1 (he mucked in a hell of a lot more with DS2).

allegretto · 09/01/2018 09:03

Tricky question for me. I would be inclined to say no (sorry DH!) but not because of him but because of other considerations (e.g. not being able to choose where I want to live).

Charolais · 09/01/2018 09:06

Yes, but I would have changed some of the things we did in the first 10 yrs and tried harder for another baby. Married 34 yrs now.

nobutreally · 09/01/2018 09:08

Absolutely. I'd do the wedding differently, I suspect, but he's a keeper.

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