To ask if you would re-marry your DP, knowing now what you didn't back then?

[constantchange]

I thought this would make for an interesting thread.--
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If you could go back to the year you married your husband/wife, would you still marry them, knowing everything you do about them now that you didn't back then?

[isithotinhereorisitjustme]

I don't know. We've been together 23 years, but I have made many compromises - career wise, socially, etc that have very slowly led to me becoming isolated and pigeon holed into a role that I had never wanted. I'm bored and frustrated, but am in the process of trying to work out whether that is the marriage, or just how the decisions I have made so far have shaped my life.

[fantasmasgoria1]

I would have liked to have not met either of my ex husbands and met my fiancé at 18. First h all categories of abuse, 2nd physical and mental and my fiancé is amazing I am still coming to terms with how a normal relationship is!

[Rufustherenegadereindeer1]

I would definitely marry him again

There are things in our life i would change some of which would make our relationship better

But everyone loves my husband...he is a sweetie (fucking irritating bastard on occasion, but overall a sweetie

[Trinity66]

Yes

[Lovemusic33]

No,
Though technically I’m no longer with him but we are still married, I think I regretted it almost straight away, I don’t regret having my dc’s (dd1 born before we married) but I regret getting married so young and to someone a lot older than me, at the time the age difference didn’t seem a big problem but as time went on it became obvious that we were completely different mainly due to the age gap (he was ready to sit on his ass and watch tv at the weekend whilst I wanted to be out doing things and improving my life). We were together for 11 years. I can’t wait to get divorced.

[DodoPatrol]

Umm.
Probably not, no.
He has health problems, physical and mental, that leave him gloomy and irritable, and I’m a bit shit at the Florence Nightingale act.
Some of the mental health issues seem to have been passed down to at least one of the kids, or multiplied by my own similar issues to be twice as bad, so that’s a guilt tripping factor too.
It’s not his fault, but...

[rocketgirl22]

Yes in a heartbeat. Married for 15 years and wish I had met him when I was younger and we would have time for one more child. We have 2 children.

He is my world, I am his, we belong together and it has always been this way

[TempusEejit]

No. DH is a lovely man but I've had to give up too much to be with him.

[Fionne]

My marriage broke down after 36 years but I’d still marry my husband again because we were great for a very very long time and id not have missed that for the world.

[GreeboIsMySpiritAnimal]

Oh, I’d snap him up before he had a chance to chance his mind!

I had doubts on my wedding day. Ten years on, he’s proven all those doubts wrong. I couldn’t ask for a better husband or father to my children.

[Honeycombcrunch]

Yes, he's a wonderful man.

[WrittenandGrown]

Definitely. Would not change a thing about him (well maybe the snoring in sync with the dog could stop).

[RaeSkywalker]

Yes, he’s my best friend and an amazing father. I’m so proud to be his wife- I don’t know where I’d be without him.

[FourForYouGlenCoco]

Yes, a million times. We got together too young, split up, ended up getting back together a couple of years later, and have never looked back. The grass was very much not greener. We both feel like we lucked out. Underneath the grouchy exterior he’s a good, kind, honest man, and the loveliest dad (2 small children with one on the way). We make a great team, have always complemented each other really well and still do. He’s improving with age, and I like to think I am too, in lots of ways.
This has prompted me to message him and tell him how much I love him - we don’t say it to each other enough at the moment. Good thread ❤️

[Oblomov18]

Yes.
But, am I allowed to live in the shed/loft/garage/extension - part time?
Because I crave being on my own more. And then be able to trot back up the path, to resume family life? Perfect.

[SylviaTietjens]

No, I wouldn’t have. Or if I had I wouldn’t have children with him again. Despite assuring me that I could keep my career and independence after having children I am now a sahm. Dc1 has additional needs, we could have both gone part time and manage it but dh wouldn’t consider it. He would have been happy for me to stay in my job and dc to be incredibly distressed by going to childcare. So I had to give up my career. I now rely on him entirely to provide for us, I will never get my career back and at the moment I can’t see a time when dc1 will be able to cope with me not being present for any chuck of the day.

He’s still the man I fell in love with but he doesn’t understand or care how much he’s let me down.

[jellycat1]

Not rft but what an excellent question. Yes I would.

[Member984815]

Yes but as someone else said not in a church and I would do it all my own way . So much outside pressure to do things a certain way .

[RainyDayBear]

Not married yet (we’re tying the knot later this year) but ten years before we got together we had a drunken kiss at 16. With hindsight I really could have saved myself a lot of idiotic boyfriends and never let him go back then! I would choose him over again in a heartbeat.

[RaeSkywalker]

Sylvia

[constantchange]

These replies are great It's lovely to hear so many people are happy with lovely partners. Gives me hope!

To those who don't feel happy right now

[DotCottonDotCom]

Would I fuck 😂😂😂

[maddnessintheroost]

Absolutely but I would have stayed round my mums the night before as lovely cousins staying round thought it would be lovely to chat well into the night - sort of last minute extra hen do - I was shattered the next day

[GabriellaMontez]

About 5 years into a 10 year marriage I wished I hadn't. Too late. Anyway I'm out now

[Dani240]

Yes yes one million percent yes! In a heartbeat. But I would have ignored my mother and had a registry office wedding and a pub meal after - there was no need for the huge wedding.