Every god damn year!!!

[WarwickDavisAsPlates]

Came home today to find another Christmas card through the letter box addressed to Mr and Mrs J Smith, that's the third this year that has been addressed this way.

I didn't change my name when I got married and I don't go by Mrs. Why can't people (in laws) just get my bloody name right! It's not hard to address the envelope to John and Sarah is it?

I would never address a Christmas card to Shaun when their name is Sean, I'd make sure I'd got it right before posting. So AIBU to think this is just bloody rude and to tell the many offenders to get my name right in future or just don't include me in the card at all?

Me too! I thought it was an oversight at first but having explained (twice) to the sender that that is not my name, I now realize it is a "statement".

Oh god, again? third one this week at least.

We realise you are the most important person in the world, but other people might forget your name, or use old fashioned rules of address that they don't know make everyone pissy these days.

Return to sender, not known at this address. 😉

YANBU. I'm a "Dr" not a "Mrs" and it really winds me up when certain people close to me - extended family - still insist on sending Xmas cards to "Mr and Mrs".

I agree OP. I get this every year. I haven’t changed my surname and I don’t use Mrs. I DEFINITELY haven’t changed my first name to john so calling me Mrs John is fecking irritating!!!

It’s not hard to remember someone’s name if you apparently think enough of them to send a xmas card.

If you don’t think enough of me to know my name then don’t send a card.

Have you not seen the numerous other threads about this?

PhD not medical? YABU.

@CurryWorst - and some people, like my bil, do it deliberately because they disapprove of women not changing their name. He knows I didn't change my name (he's commented on it often enough) but still addresses cards etc. to dhName and myName dhSurname. It's very deliberate.

Most don't though. There was a thread the other day all about what an awful bitch some doddery old great aunt was.
Who gives a fuck, for christs sake? It's a bloody xmas card.

I accidentally wrote a card to Mr and Mrs the other day and then realised that my old school friend is a Dr. I feel guilty. But I also feel overwhelmed, frazzled and extremely worried about my sick mother who is currently refusing to eat. And there were no more envelopes. So I sent it.

I really, really hope my doctor friend will cut me a bit of slack and not moan about me all over the internet. I am, indeed, finding a lot of things hard to remember at the moment because my brain is too full of worry, stress and anxiety. Sorry if that bothers you. It probably bothers me more.

These threads are so boring. How the hell do you expect people to remember what you've chosen to call yourself? Seriously, do what you want, but don't expect anyone to pander to you.

Another one of these threads??!

Send it back. How dare people send you such effrontery. Or shrug and get past it.

I cannot understand someone being kind enough to send me a Christmas card, and me getting arsey that they didn't address me as Dr.
Season of goodwill..... Nah, more opportunities for people to get disproportionately uptight. Get over yourselves!

These threads are so boring. How the hell do you expect people to remember what you've chosen to call yourself? Seriously, do what you want, but don't expect anyone to pander to you.

Yes actually, I expect that if someone sends me a Christmas card they should actually remember my name. I bet Dhs Nan would be really annoyed if we sent her a card addressed to Steven when his name is Rose.

And no I haven't seen the other threads about this, if I had I'd have posted on there.

It's only my in laws that do this so I feel like they are doing it on purpose because they are fully aware that I didn't change my name as we've spoken about it many times.

Is it really worth getting upset about.

I have never changed my name in my two marriages. Still call myself Miss Bright. Cards have arrived addressed to Mr & Mrs DH Surname, even from my mother. I am a little surprised but not enough to say anything.

There's your Christmas ruined then

Pander to what? Being the same? That makes no sense.

Morriszap: exactly! These people have known me at least... 10-15 years I've only been married for 3 years. They never had a problem addressing cards to "Sarah and John" before.

zeebee you expect your family to address you as Dr?

That is brilliant!

I bet Dhs Nan would be really annoyed if we sent her a card addressed to Steven when his name is Rose

Actually there is every chance you have mortally offended her by NOT calling her Mrs Husbands Name on her card. Bet she's have more manners than to whine abut it like you though

Morriszap: exactly! These people have known me at least... 10-15 years I've only been married for 3 years. They never had a problem addressing cards to "Sarah and John" before.

Curry worst no I haven't, I'm polite enough to check that I'm sending the card to the correct name.

She's unmarried so it wouldn't be an issue.

I have one friend whose card I carefully address as Herfirst Hersurname and Hisfirst Hissurname. It annoys me every time as that becomes 25 characters to write instead of Mr & Mrs Hissurname, which would be 16 ...

I lose track of which of my relatives are Drs, as none of them are medical Drs. I don't intend to offend, it's just memory lapse.