Every god damn year!!!

[WarwickDavisAsPlates]

Came home today to find another Christmas card through the letter box addressed to Mr and Mrs J Smith, that's the third this year that has been addressed this way.

I didn't change my name when I got married and I don't go by Mrs. Why can't people (in laws) just get my bloody name right! It's not hard to address the envelope to John and Sarah is it?

I would never address a Christmas card to Shaun when their name is Sean, I'd make sure I'd got it right before posting. So AIBU to think this is just bloody rude and to tell the many offenders to get my name right in future or just don't include me in the card at all?

I hear you OP, I'm exactly the same.

It’s funny how rare it is for anyone to make the mistake the other way round (Mr and Mrs DW’s name).
I buy stickers with our names and address on them, hopefully this will help them remember.

Family should remenber your bloody name. It's rude and disrespectful

YANBU.

Yeah OP, you're perfect. You've never ever got it wrong.

I can not understand the mentality of someone who gets a card, a little "hi, thinking of you at this time of year " missive, who instead of thinking "isn't that nice" instead rants on about the fucking name on the envelope.

Get a life, and a hold of yourself.

I'd go NC OP. These people don't deserve you in their life.

I surprised people read the envelopes.

These people have known me at least... 10-15 years I've only been married for 3 years. They never had a problem addressing cards to "Sarah and John" before. And there's plenty of people in these circumstances who would want to be addressed as "Mr and Mrs J whatever", and how many people ask "now you're married how do I address your Christmas card?"

We've had another thread where the OP was just as fed up as you, but because the card was addressed to "Sarah and John".

It's really difficult to get used to another mode of address when all your upbringing has told you that what you're about to write is rude and offensive. So just accept that people have been brought up differently and are actually trying to be polite.

If I get a card returned "not known at this address" I just assume that the person I sent it to is dead.

I bet Dhs Nan would be really annoyed if we sent her a card addressed to Steven when his name is Rose.

his name is Rose?
She might also be a bit miffed at being called him.

DP and I are not married. MIL sends a card to Mr + Mrs (DP surname). Really doesn't bother me. My nan spells my name wrong in every card she sends me (think she'd have learned in 35 years) I just roll my eyes and get on with life.

It's really difficult to get used to another mode of address when all your upbringing has told you that what you're about to write is rude and offensive. So just accept that people have been brought up differently and are actually trying to be polite

If her name has been Mrs X the whole time then surely they can do that? Not like she's decided after twenty years to call herself princess consuella banana hammock she's just expecting her name to be remembered.

13 years and counting here.

All Xmas cards go straight in the recycling, but anything else sent to the wrong name gets sent back.

I would never address a Christmas card to Shaun when their name is Sean, I'd make sure I'd got it right before posting

I'm with you on that OP - it's really sloppy not to take the trouble to spell people's names correctly. One of my oldest friends always spells my name wrong (it's a name with 2 or 3 alternative spellings but I've known her since 1982!) and every time I notice she's got it wrong. It's odd because she's quite a precise person in lots of other ways....

You seriously send back a card because the envelope doesn't match your preferences? Bloody hell.

It's not a preference, it's a name.

Honestly, I wouldn't even be bothered about this, far more important things to worry about, you can ask people but you cannot demand it, and if they choose to ignore it then you need to find way of handling it, as you will be annoy over something trivial each year, and tbh its just not worth the time or effort to do so.

Preferences?

It doesn't even have her name on...

But different it it's your second cousin twice removed husbands hamster.

But this is her in laws who were presumably at the wedding and I'm frequent contact ego refuse to acknowledge the DILs name.

Hardly a preference is it

In frequent contact who

I didn't take DH's surname and I don't use Mrs. It doesn't bother me if people assume I'm called Mrs DH. But it does annoy me when people do it on purpose because they're annoyed that I haven't taken his name. MIL and SIL are the worst offenders. I was a witness at SIL's wedding and she asked me to sign as Mrs DH (I refused because it isn't my name). It later turned out that she had informed the church I was called Mrs DH and it caused a minor disruption on the day because there was nobody with that legal name present to sign the register.

Sounds like people are sending you Xmas cards who really shouldn't. They have misjudged you.

I will admit that the Nan example was a bad one because she just writes "Smith-Jones family" which I feel is an effective way to keep everyone happy.

I have to say I'm surprised that anyone would be annoyed that their post is addressed to their first name... that has given me something to think about.

“Return to sender, not known at this address.”

And that isn’t rude either?

I’m getting bored of these threads about Christmas cards with incorrect names on. Why don’t you just tell everyone you aren’t doing Christmas cards ever again and ask people not to send you any. Then you won’t have this problem again.

OH’s title is Dr, but most cards are addressed to Mr. He CBA to get offended by it.

Next yea,r make sure you address their card to Mr & Mrs Herfirstname Surname.

When they question it just say 'Oh! It was the first of your names to spring to mind... you called me John on the last one you sent - I can't see the problem?'

Yet another reason to stop sending Christmas cards, just in case, god forbid, we offend a recipient by some incorrect form of address which we might not have been informed about anyway

If I threw away - or returned to sender - Christmas and birthday cards where people can't spell my surname correctly I'd end up with no goddamn cards at all. I usually have a minor and then think "hey ho, they've remembered me anyway - how lovely"

I'm 'Dr Fuckery' (maiden name) and 'Mrs MarriedName' and will answer to Ms or Miss too, because, you know, life is too short. I don't care. The card is what counts!