To show the headteacher this...

[nevertoobigforharibo]

Some of the parents at my child’s school set up a Facebook page for parents of year 6 children to discuss homework/trips/reminders etc. The page is really useful.

Teachers are aware of the page (most year groups have one) and have asked on a recent newsletter that any issues parents may have with regards to class teachers, bullying etc are not discussed and are addressed with the class teacher instead. We all follow these rules.

Today one of the SMSA’s (dinner lady/lunchtime supervisor) at the school posted the following... (I have no idea why she is in the group actually as she doesn’t have a child at the school so she has since been removed from the page)

Post edited by MNHQ so that is is no longer a verbatim account "Dinner lady posted about pupils throwing unwanted food on the floor and their attitude towards her and expecting her to tidy up".

I get the frustration and think the boys involved should be dealt with but I found this really inappropriate.

A couple of parents commented that they felt this was an inappropriate place to post this and the person should go to their manager/headteacher to discuss the incident as she was discussing children (our children!) that she works with. She then replied with ‘I could name the children if I wanted to but haven’t as I want to remain professional.’

I have screenshot her post and comments and mentioned to DP that I’m going to bring it to the headteachers attention but he thinks I should keep out of it.

Any opinions?

Dinner ladies get paid £7/hour to clean up after obnoxious kids. They don't need your pearl clutching.

She has had lots of apologies and sympathy from the parents on the page- not one negative comment which I’m glad about.

Really? I thought she got comments about how inappropriate it was to post, and then got removed from the group?

The rules of parents not publicly slating teachers or getting into personal rows about bullying are clearly for the best: stuff like that needs to go through the official channels, not be exacerbated by social media rows and confabs.

The dinner lady is speaking to the parents of the children who've upset her. Not all of their kids will have been involved, but if someone's sure that their child would never do such a thing then there's nothing to be lost by a reminder that other kids do, and the stress and upset it causes. No: it's not professional for her to post on FB, and it's certainly not advisable in terms of her future at the school (who no doubt have a social media policy for staff). But she didn't name names, and she didn't post an abusive rant, and there's nobody more responsible for these children's behaviour than the parents themselves.

Poor Woman! What snotty entitled little brats.

"attacking the children in her care"

Translation: telling the truth about their behaviour.

I would tell the head actually, it is almost certainly against the schools internet policy (I can't even say what school i work at on FB, let alone talk about the children) and yes, kids can be bloody foul and it's an awful, thankless job, I hate being on hall duty for lunch, but there are procedures in place to deal with these things for a very good reason and either the dinner lady is ignoring that or doesn't know and isn't being supported enough, either way it needs addressing.

It sounds like you've dealt with it perfectly, and your DS' reaction is lovely but there will be other parents who have either slagged off the dinner lady to their kids, making things worse or completely over reacted and punished a child who may not even have been involved and there may be some children with anxiety or SEN who would be upset at not having been named as not involved and who this one post would be a massive deal for and even if they haven't seen it a child will mention it at some point tomorrow.

The boys were way out of line and should be disciplined - both at home (as parents are now aware) and at school. For the latter to happen though, the HT needs to be aware. The dinner lady herself should have gone through the proper channels and reported the boys herself. However fed up she's feeling (and I totally understand her point), she absolutely CANNOT post on social media in the way she has. That's a disciplinary offence for her, aside from the boys.

I'm not suggesting you take it upon yourself to report her, but I fear for her, as this is bound to get back to the Head sooner or later.

Perhaps the parents need to know what their little darlings get up to it sounds more like a chimpanzee’s tea party than a school lunchtime. I feel sorry for all staff who have to work with children now.

If I saw this I'd be privately contacting the poor woman to find out whether my son was involved - and heaven help him if he was. I honestly couldn't give two pins if this is the "appropriate " way for it to be raised, Id be far more interested in knowing why the school tolerated such awful behaviour.

The Dinner lady is venting, personally
I dont blame her. She doesnt get paid enough to be taking abuse and rudness. Perhaps this could be a good opportunity to teach children, you know R.E.S.P.E.C.T.
Instead of you all running in every time something is said about your little poppets. I'd be mortified if my dd was misbehaving that badly that a dinner lady was dreading going to work.
BTW I'm not implying its your DC doing all this.

My partner works additional duties at lunchtime (works in education). He insists on doing so for the extra cash, but fucking hell 'thankless job' is absolutely the way to describe it. I also bet she's had (several) words with the head and got nowhere, poor woman.

Break/lunch is when kids have the least supervision and they can behave like absolute monsters at times, shocking attitudes from all accounts. As for anyone saying 'well my kid certainly wasn't there', there is always an opportunity to reiterate that all members of staff in school should be treated with equal respect, from the headteacher to the cleaners.

Kids whose parents' first instinct when the low-paid worker who cleans up after them reaches the end of her tether is to complain about professionalism are EXACTLY the problem. Far too many kids who learn all about their rights but don't want responsibilities.

Just a thought but maybe the dinner ladies don’t get sent a copy of the school newsletter? I work in a secondary school and the catering staff are a separate company so they never come to our staff meetings. We’re all given a talk at the start of the year about how we’re not to get involved in any school social media stuff etc. The catering staff would not get the same talk.

I think it’s lovely that your son wants to make her a card. I suspect the catering team have complained about behaviour before but it’s fallen on deaf ears, so she’s feeling frustrated and unappreciated.

I am with the dinner lady on this one. She must have been at the end of her tether to post this on FB.
Shame on the Y6's who caused her to post and to the parent's of these Y6's who have not taught their Dc's basic manners.

I hope you do show the HT and she rips the little darlings a new one. After 5 years working as a dinner lady she would have seen and dealt with a lot---this must have been bad

for the dinner lady for not letting this het brushed under the carpet.

@Tsundoku The only comments that may be seen as ‘negative’ were the ones saying that she should remove this post as it would be frowned upon by the school to vent on social media which could land her in trouble. The vast majority were supportive of her post and were mortified about the behaviour from some of the year 6 boys. They removed her from the group as the page is for parents of children in the year. Not sure who accepted her or why.

She has not named any children, or been derogatory about them. In fact she has stated that she cares about them.
For a rant of her 'worst day' it's really quite tame.
I hope the boys get found out and come to learn that their behavior is not so funny after all.

I’ve messaged the lady privately asking her to confirm that my DS wasn’t involved (he wasn’t Thank god). She has said she will go to head and ask for some support with the behaviour at lunchtime. I hope they all get a talking to from the headteacher (as someone else said- they should be setting an example to the rest of the school as year group) and those directly involved suitably punished.

Jesus keep out
Poor woman and maybe she is not as privileged and educated as some to realise that Facebook isn't appopriate

I hate social media

Whilst I have sympathy for her if any member of staff at my husband's school friended or joined a parents group they would be disciplined. My husband isn't even allowed to have dd's best friend's parents on Facebook & he doesn't even teach the girl.

God-that poor woman. Paid peanuts and treated like that.

I expect knowing the bonkers state of some school, she will be out of a job by the end of the week for posting that. Sounds like she was at the end of her tether.

I feel sorry for the dinner lady too.

I've had experience of doing various voluntary stuff at dc's school - and while most of it was great, on occasion, I was treated with zero respect by some of the children. The 'you can't tell us what to do' or 'you're not a teacher' - when you are simply asking for a normal standard of behaviour - was a common theme.

The parents of those year 6 six boys should be having words - with their boys.

And the Headteacher should read the riot act to them.

Poor lady to be degraded and treated like this by kids is just disgusting. She must be pretty fed up and desperate to risk her job. I suspect that she really wanted the parents to know how vile their little angels are as nothing was being done at school. Schools should make kids clear up after themselves perhaps then they might have some respect for others.

Alongside losing her job, I predict this will be on the Daily Fail website before too long.

I wouldn’t be reporting it at all but speaking with my children hoping they were showing the poor woman some kindness and respect

She’s actual being very unprofessional and it’s probably in her contract that she shouldn’t be discussing these matters on FB.

Instead of shaming parents into saying “oh was it mine?” She should be taking it to her line manager and/or the head to deal with the issue.

Yes it is hideous behaviour BUT schools have systems for managing behaviour and for staff to report things to their line manager, even the midday meals staff. At my school and in most schools staff are not allowed to be friends on Facebook with any parents or children who are at the school (or past pupils if they are under 18) and it’s in our code of conduct that we don’t post about work on social media. This lady has gone about it in totally the wrong way and probably will have to face some consequences, but it’s unlikely she didn’t know she shouldn’t post on social media.