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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be pissed off

242 replies

Pi55ed0ff · 15/10/2017 20:30

it was a significant birthday this weekend. i've been married to dh for 15 years. we don't live near his family, but he made the effort to visit them whilst working nearby a few weeks back. they made a big deal about him bringing back a present for my birthday for me. he said it was probably jewellery by the size and shape of the gift and that they had all chipped in for it. it sat on the side looking at me for 2 weeks. i opened it and it's a bar of green and black's chocolate. aibu to be upset that they made no effort whatsoever? for previous birthdays his parents alone have given me a £20 gift card, so its weird that between 6 working adults they've managed a £1.50 bar of chocolate, right? i'm hiding my disappointment for dh's sake.

OP posts:
Mittens1969 · 16/10/2017 08:26

The OP’s DH sounds very controlling, not allowing her to criticise his family. Not allowing??? You can say what you like, OP, and you’re justified.

KoolKoala07 · 16/10/2017 08:38

Definitely sounds like something else should have gone into the bag. I'd ring and say thanks for the choc and see if they mention anything else.

PlateOfBiscuits · 16/10/2017 08:50

Msg your PIL and say you're writing thank yous for your all your gifts and who exactly do you need to include on the one for the bar of chocolate?

One of two things will surely happen:

  1. they'll be shocked all you've opened is a bar of chocolate and say there was also x y z in the bag. Or
  2. they'll have to list everyone who chipped in on the £1.50 bar of chocolate and see that they have been arses.
LushBlitzer · 16/10/2017 08:55

Could it be that they got you another present, and DH somehow on the way of taking it home lost it, or broke it and doesn't want to fess up? Still seems weird though.

whatsleep · 16/10/2017 08:59

I’m guessing that as op has disappeared for a while that maybe there was a lovely surprise for her, a party or maybe she’s been winked off on holiday!

Are you really all suggesting that because her husband won’t have anything negative said about his parents, he must be controlling and dictatorial? Wow! Most people are protective of their parents and would rather others didn’t say negative things about them surely?

justkeeponsmiling · 16/10/2017 08:59

Seriously, your 'D'H is being a total dick. He knows full well that this is a shit present!

SparklyMagpie · 16/10/2017 09:06

I hope you drank the whisky, he can fuck off as he also ate your chocolate so he can't say no to you drinking his whisky

I'd be fuming OP

MadMags · 16/10/2017 09:08

Your husband is a right dick.

Send him to leave with his scabby fucker parents.

TheHobbitMum · 16/10/2017 09:21

Wow, you married an arse and hid parents are tight m kg I'd rather have nothing than be given such an insult. Id message his parents and ask politely who chipped in for the chocolate bar as you are writing thank you notes and don't want to miss anyone out. Hopefully they'll then ask about the gift that was lost/broken that should've been with the chocolate! If there was nothing else intended I'd never buy his family a gift again and leave it to him. I'd be very hurt by this

Gromance02 · 16/10/2017 11:18

I would ring them and say that your present appears to have got lost in the post as all you have actually received is a choccy bar.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 16/10/2017 11:29

I'd pour that whiskey down the sink. Your OH is either in on something or a total dick.

That's EXACTLY what I was going to suggest!

After all, if he's not going to drink it, you may as well disinfect the kitchen sink with it.

He's a twat! How DARE he treat you like this?!

VladmirsPoutine · 16/10/2017 11:31

I too would ring and say that it appears you didn't get receive a gift as all you seem to have got is a bar of chocolate. I don't care if they think you grabby or whatever. Make them sweat a bit. Be totally obtuse. Of course there must be something missing, you're just helpfully informing them.

pengymum · 16/10/2017 11:44

Sell the bottle of whisky and buy yourself something with the money. If DH asks about it, just say you drank it as were upset!

Sohurt17 · 16/10/2017 11:51

Do what Poutine says. Let them sweat.

ElinoristhenewEnid · 16/10/2017 11:57

I would have cracked open the bottle of whisky - over DHs head!

HouseworkIsASin10 · 16/10/2017 12:05

I'd go with Plate's suggestion. That would be mortifying to answer.

Msg your PIL and say you're writing thank yous for your all your gifts and who exactly do you need to include on the one for the bar of chocolate?

CredulousThickos · 16/10/2017 12:06

Any chance your DH has taken (sold?) the real present?

TheMaddHugger · 16/10/2017 12:19

Your Husband ate your chocolate, go drink his whiskey

((((((((((Hugs))))))))) OP

Tell him I said he 'Sucks Hairy Old man Kangaroo Balls'

to be pissed off
Minxmumma · 16/10/2017 12:29

Definately get a list of all contributers then send them all a Freddo for Xmas - you would be being generous.

Booboobooboo84 · 16/10/2017 12:38

You have a DH problem for sure.

Maybe ring the DMIL and ask who to include in the thank you card for the bar of chocolate. If a present has gone missing they will say so. If that's what they bought you then I swear by satan you send them a single freddo bar for Christmas.

cleanasawhistle · 16/10/2017 13:13

OP I hope its a mix up and there is a thoughtful present on its way.

My OH only ever received cards off MIL for his birthdays even the milestone ones.I didn't even get a card.

We always thought that the whole family were treated the same so never gave it a second thought............in MILs one day and she takes a jumper out of a bag and says try that on,have you bought me a jumper says my OH......she says no its for his sisters husband birthday.

Andylion · 16/10/2017 15:10

Don't throw the whiskey out! Your parents paid good money for it.

cherrycola2004 · 16/10/2017 15:30

I just can’t believe your DH thinks it’s ok!!! What?!?!? Def call them and thank them see if there is anything missing !!

Theweasleytwins · 16/10/2017 16:15

This thread has made me cry a littleSad

thebear1 · 16/10/2017 16:29

If your dh doesn't care about the whiskey sell it and buy yourself a present with it.