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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be pissed off

242 replies

Pi55ed0ff · 15/10/2017 20:30

it was a significant birthday this weekend. i've been married to dh for 15 years. we don't live near his family, but he made the effort to visit them whilst working nearby a few weeks back. they made a big deal about him bringing back a present for my birthday for me. he said it was probably jewellery by the size and shape of the gift and that they had all chipped in for it. it sat on the side looking at me for 2 weeks. i opened it and it's a bar of green and black's chocolate. aibu to be upset that they made no effort whatsoever? for previous birthdays his parents alone have given me a £20 gift card, so its weird that between 6 working adults they've managed a £1.50 bar of chocolate, right? i'm hiding my disappointment for dh's sake.

OP posts:
Sparkletastic · 15/10/2017 21:05

Do they always buy you similarly shit gifts?
I would send a terse thank you and suggest you stop buying one another gifts from here on.

Robots1Humans0 · 15/10/2017 21:06

Not only is this totally shit OP, but who wraps a bar of chocolate?? This makes me think it was deliberate, no trickery, that is your one and only gift Shock hope DH got you something awesome to make up for it

Santawontbelong · 15/10/2017 21:06

Well that's your Xmas shopping drastically reduced op. . .

scrabbler3 · 15/10/2017 21:07

They're either very spiteful or there is something you've missed. I really hope it's the latter. If it's the former, stop sucking up to them because they don't merit it.

PerspicaciaTick · 15/10/2017 21:09

Is there no chance that there is lovely, small gift rolled out of the bag into the car/DH's briefcase etc.?

plominoagain · 15/10/2017 21:13

Wow. If that's really all there is , I'd have to reply in kind at Christmas . One individually wrapped Ferraro Rocher each should do the trick , I feel .

If they really felt so little , I'd rather they hadn't have bothered if it were me .

Lunde · 15/10/2017 21:15

Send them a thank-you letter and include the number for a food bank saying that you are so sorry that they have fallen on hard times

whatsleep · 15/10/2017 21:16

Maybe a surprise party some time soon?

JaneEyre70 · 15/10/2017 21:19

Wow I'd be equally furious and heartbroken. I wouldn't make any effort with any of their birthdays/christmas from now on though.

gamerchick · 15/10/2017 21:21

he'd make a million excuses for them. he certainly wouldn't ask them what it was about

Let him then tell him his families gifts are his total responsibility from now on.

Ahardmanisgoodtofind · 15/10/2017 21:22

Wow that's just bizarre! Although I must say thanks op my aunt, who every year gets me a much appreciated voucher for my birthday, gave me a very ugly, very large dress/top thing that she'd obviously bought herself and decided to give to me. You may think I'm being ungrateful BUT she's a size 18-20, at my biggest I was a 12 and have managed to diet down to a ten (very occasionally an 8). She also knows I'm hyper sensitive about my weight. She WAS getting a piece of jewelry (that she wants) for her birthday.

Ahardmanisgoodtofind · 15/10/2017 21:23

**thanks op for making me feel better. I'd also text and say thanks the kids enjoyed the chocolate bar from you all, just to see if they reply

MrsWembley · 15/10/2017 21:24

Even a box of chocolates would have been better!

maddening · 15/10/2017 21:31

Send them a pair of freddos for christmas

Zaphodsotherhead · 15/10/2017 21:31

A bar of chocolate is pretty rubbish even if it was given as an additional present with something else. As an only present it's..well, it's so bad it's almost laughable.

Didn't your husband say anything when you opened it? Not even 'oh!'?

maddening · 15/10/2017 21:32

And reuse the gift bag for them

user1471449805 · 15/10/2017 21:35

And your husband said nothing?

Mammyloveswine · 15/10/2017 21:53

Omg that's crazy. Get husband to ring and ask if that was it or if there was supposed to be something else. Hope you got spoilt off dh and kids. Happy birthday

BlueSapp · 15/10/2017 21:56

The gift bag and the wrapping probably cost more than the bar if chocolate, tbh that’s a total insult and I’d be very annoyed

KeepServingTheDrinks · 15/10/2017 22:11

Agree with other posters - remembering/buying/wrapping/giving becomes his job from now on....

Catinthecorner · 15/10/2017 22:15

Send a huge box for the six of them to share at Xmas. Lots of layers of wrapping and the like. Makes sure it contains one lonely quality street for them to share

Stressalot42 · 15/10/2017 22:16

Send a huge box for the six of them to share at Xmas. Lots of layers of wrapping and the like. Makes sure it contains one lonely quality street for them to share

This, but make sure it’s not a purple one!!! Angry

SchadenfreudePersonified · 15/10/2017 22:21

Agree re: the single quality street - make sure it's a cracknels - they're shite!

GlitteryFluff · 15/10/2017 22:25

I can't believe your husband hasn't said anything? Or spoken to them?

Pigface1 · 15/10/2017 22:39

One of two things has happened - (a) something fell out of the bag before it reached you or someone forgot to put something in the bag in the first place or (b) they're the meanest most spiteful people in the world.

(A) does seem more likely given that you usually get a £20 gift card from your PILs alone and nothing you've said indicates they've got form for spite.

However this falls to your DH to sort out. It would be very easy - and not particularly awkward - for him to ring his mum or dad and just ask. It's what I'd do if a situation like this arose with my parents and my DH.