Husband says I am punching above my weight

[Maybeoneday77]

Just looking to clarify something here. Yesterday my husband said he thinks i am punching above my weight. He is very into fitness and spends a lot of time on the gym. I have 3 small children, one is 6mths and I admit I have 16 pounds of baby weight to lose and don't feel good about myself at the moment.
He says it was a "nothing" comment and can't understand why I am so upset.
Who's he unreasonable twat here?

Some people eat for emotional reasons. So for them it isn't about deciding to lose weight. It's much more complex.

In what situation would someone ever say such a thing?

Punching above your weight doesn't mean doing very well in trying circumstances .

Neither is it a reference to being overweight. It means aspiring to something / someone majorly out of your league.
So many of you taking it as a compliment

He's being Totally unreasonable. Tell him that perhaps if YOU got time to go to the gym, you'd be able to lose some weight. So how about him looking after the kids and paying for your gym visits.

I would make sure you're getting enough time out - not to go to the gym, for whatever makes you feel good.

My fb feed has a fair number of committed dad runners on it - wonder who's looking after the 2 little kids when the smug fit person is doing all the running? Fine if you really are getting equal leisure time...

As for the comment, I'd tell him straight he's really hurt your feelings, if you haven't already.

I really hope those of you who think it's a compliment haven't been going round cheerfully saying it to people thinking you were complimenting them!

It's a massive, nasty insult.

Punching above your weight is a boxing metaphor which means you are out of your league. The OP's partner is implying she is lucky to have him because he is do amazing.

...so amazing.

BIG insult.

TO clarify:

In this situation the OP's partner is bigging himself up and suggesting she is not as attractive as he is.

However, if I were to say to a pupil, who was producing excellent work on more complex material than the rest of her peers, that she was punching above her weight, I WOULD be paying her a compliment!

Holy shit he is a dick head!!! What a horrible thing to say to the mother of your children. I'd have told him to feck off and find better if that's how he feels. I can't believe anyone fancies themselves that much.

You are 6 months post partum not everyone bounces straight back to prebaby weight so don't add pressure for his sake.

AtHomeDad Ive lost ten stone and i used to get abused in the street by strangers. Im not bloody grateful to bullies though It was ME that had to put the effort in to losing weight not those cunts.

And one of them actually asked me out post weight loss Saying no was better than an orgasm.

Also op has he started to take legal/illegal substances to enhance his muscle mass??? These can have massive effects on personality, not that it excuses his behaviour but could explain why he said such a dickish thing!!!

Oh and even if he was not suggesting it was on physical terms that she is punching above her weight to say that to your partner on any terms is ridiculous so there really is no context needed.
It's bang out of order regardless.

I've heard it used about a small organisation which achieves really big things. It's suggesting that a small team with few resources are managing to make a much bigger impact than expected.

In boxing, it would mean you are holding your own against opponents in a heavier class than yourself.

I'm going to google it...

Terrible thing to say to someone! I'd be livid if my OH said this.

So, both uses are known.

Yes but surely they mean the same thing? The OPs husband is basically saying to get ' well done for holding onto your hugely attractive fit husband, even though you are fat'. Hardly a compliment!

They both mean the same thing! It's offensive because the OPs husband thinks she's not really on his level of attractiveness.

Personally I'd tell him to fuck off and find someone he thinks is on his level.

If the op's husband was saying "you're punching above you're weight being married to me" then he is borderline emotionally abusive.
If the op's husband was saying "you're punching above you're weight trying to lose that much weight that fast" then he's an insensitive tit (perhaps well intentioned but still a massive massive own goal)

Either way, insulting, demoralising comment - what a douche canoe.

Nasty comment from a nasty self absorbed dick. You have just carried a baby within your body, its been pushed to its limits, what does he blooming expect, us your busy looking after baby and the rest of the kids. He sounds like an absute knob.

You looking after the kids enables him to go to the Gym, give him the children to look after and see how he can keep up his buff body. By the way, has he any redeeming qualities?

That's not an "alternative" use, pickle. It means exactly what everybody's already said it means

@Smeaton lol

What an incredibly hurtful thing to say. I would feel that my dh was trying to make me feel bad. Has this come out of the blue?