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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU

312 replies

MissingWinter · 22/07/2017 22:07

I went to visit my friend round at hers on Thursday, we were sat together at her laptop, she went onto a particular site and started looking at some shoes and other clothing, once she had finished I took over and went to the men's section. Me DP and DS are due to go on holiday and I have been wanting to buy DP a few nice pairs of swim shorts. I see a nice pair which I liked and I was pretty sure that he would like (they were delivered today and he likes them)

As I clicked on them I said "Oh these are nice aren't they?" she just rolled her eyes, then she had a sudden outburst and said "You really make me sick why would you spend so fking much on a pair of swim shorts for him and no they're not nice I feel as if you are taking the p out of me, you want to spend that amount on s** but I don't see you giving money to people that need it"

I stayed silent because at that point I had to back track to make sure that is what she really said, and that I wasn't hearing things, before I could answer back she that she needs to go out and that I need to leave, but we were suppose to be spending the whole day together, and I had to travel pretty far to her house.

She always makes snide comments and I just ignore her, as I don't like confrontation, I haven't heard from her since and I have been wanting to call her today to apologise as she said that it felt as if I was taking the p* out of her.

Now I am thinking why should I call her and apologise? and why shouldn't I be able to spend what I like on him? Do you think I'm the one being unreasonable here?

OP posts:
JeReviens · 22/07/2017 22:09

You can swear on MN you know.

She sounds ridiculous. LTB.

SnowiestMountain · 22/07/2017 22:09

How much were the shorts? Where were they from? What is her financial situation? Do you have a lot lore money than her?

Sexykittenhells · 22/07/2017 22:09

She sounds like a lunatic and not a friend at all. Ignore.

Original poster
MissingWinter · 22/07/2017 22:11

Sorry if anyone is confused I thought MN would keep all the () in the bad language I dislike using bad language openly

p = piss
s = shit

I really bad typing those words on a parenting site 😳😩 please forgive me.

OP posts:
Moanyoldcow · 22/07/2017 22:12

You 'friend' is a twat.

Tofutti · 22/07/2017 22:12

Good lord, apologise for what?! Confused

She's not a friend and was a pretty piss poor host to chuck you out.

Let her come to you and apologise for losing it.

Original poster
MissingWinter · 22/07/2017 22:14

The shorts where £450 and they were from an online retail partner, well her financial situation is average I always help her out and buy her nice gifts for her birthday and christmas, I met her whilst at university she is generally a nice person.

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 22/07/2017 22:15

Is your friend insinuating that you should give YOUR money to other people because you have more of it? To who? Her? Please. Your "friend" is disgustingly rude and you have nothing to apologize for.

Original poster
MissingWinter · 22/07/2017 22:15

Sorry SnowiestMountain I missed out the answer to your last question, we are basically from different walks of life.

OP posts:
PsychoPumpkin · 22/07/2017 22:15

Even if the shorts cost £300 or something, it's your money to spend & no real friend would say something so nasty. Don't apologise to her, in fact, I wouldn't bother with her at all from now on.

Flushot · 22/07/2017 22:15

You can swear on MN you know

Someone always says this. Maybe op dosent want to.

BewareOfDragons · 22/07/2017 22:15

What on earth would you apologize for?

She owes you one, but I doubt you're going to get it. Perhaps the friendship has run its course?

SnowiestMountain · 22/07/2017 22:15

They were £450?? For a pair of shorts?? Perhaps missing the point

ChrisPrattsFace · 22/07/2017 22:17

£450 for a pair of swim shorts? Jesus lord that's ALOT of money.
But if you have it to spend... good for you!
If she always makes snide comments you should confront her about them!

Squirmy65ghyg · 22/07/2017 22:17

£450?

Original poster
MissingWinter · 22/07/2017 22:18

I don't think she is going to apologise to me, if this is the end of our friendship I would like to end it on good terms.

OP posts:
PatriciaHolm · 22/07/2017 22:20

I really don't think I could be friends with someone who thought 450 was a reasonable amount to spend on swimwear, and we earns a lot.

emmyrose2000 · 22/07/2017 22:20

Your "friend" sounds nuts. And extremely rude! If one of my so called friends spoke to me like that we'd no longer be friends. You have nothing to apologise for. She, on the other hand, should really apologise to you.

As this nastiness doesn't sound like an isolated incident, I'd drop her. She's not worth the time.

It's none of her business how much money you spend. Unless you're asking her to pay your bills (and that definitely doesn't sound the case here), she has no right to comment.

but I don't see you giving money to people that need it
Was she hinting/demanding that you give HER some money?! Crazy woman!

Optimist1 · 22/07/2017 22:20

£450 for one pair??? Shock

Icanseethepigeon · 22/07/2017 22:21

£450?? After she'd no doubt been looking at stuff for far less? Perhaps you were being a bit unreasonable... and what's an "online retail partner"? Is this a windup?

SnowiestMountain · 22/07/2017 22:21

If they were indeed £450 then good grief, thats more than some people's rent! If she's (maybe even secretly) struggling for money and you're there just spending £450 on a pair of shorts then I'm afraid I'd be a bit Hmm too.

Original poster
MissingWinter · 22/07/2017 22:22

PatriciaHolm well perhaps I am in the wrong then, but I just don't she how.

OP posts:
emmyrose2000 · 22/07/2017 22:23

£450 on a pair of swim shorts? That IS crazy, but it still gives her no right to be so appalling rude and nasty. It sounds like she's jealous of you.

Original poster
MissingWinter · 22/07/2017 22:23

emmyrose2000 she knows if she ever needs anything she can always come to me, what she said and the fact that she basically kicked me out of her house has really hurt me.

OP posts:
PsychoPumpkin · 22/07/2017 22:24

No you're NOT in the wrong! I wouldn't spend £45 on shorts let alone £450 but I don't care if others do, neither should your friend. You don't owe her anything & you weren't the rude one in all this.

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