Asking for a friend - last minute bridezilla financial demand from bridesmaids

[dangerrabbit]

Posting on behalf of a friend of my sister so may not be a juicy one as I do not have all the details, but I know how much you vipers love a wedding one so...

My sister's best friend is a bridesmaid today, the bride has just sprung on her and her other bridesmaids that she wants them to pay £60 each to have their hair and makeup done.

The bride has asked everyone to have their hair and make up done a certain way. The worst thing is that she wasn't upfront about the cost. Only yesterday when she said that the make-up would be another £30 did friend twig there would be any cost at all. And said she would rather do her own. And then on the bridesmaid WhatsApp another bridesmaid was like 'ohh I can do your hair like that for free - I can do everyone's' and then everyone said please could you.

Then the bride went on a really long winded rant about how she doesn't want to be a bridezilla but that her partner's bridesmaids are all having their hair done that way and she's paid the deposit so they have to get it done. That'll be £60 please!

So my sister wants the view of the mumsnet jury on this important issue and also your views on what her friend should say to the bride!

£60 per hairdo plus a deposit! What are they having done to their hair? Gold trims and pearls?

They are mugs for paying. My response would have been "you are kidding right," and that would have been it. So they have forked out £700 for this wedding and all forked out another £60 last minute so they didn't upset the bride. And that is exactly why people behave this way, because others will let them get away with it instead of standing up and saying "hang on, YABU, we aren't doing this."

whenyouwish,

"Hhhmmm not sure re this one. It depends how much the bride has already paid."

Well, sod all in this bride's case!

OP: "There was a destination hen weekend costing about £500 per person and all the bridal party paid for their own dresses and shoes with the total cost of around £200."

Plus the non-negotiable, addition of £60 hair/ makeup announced to each bridesmaid only on the morning of the wedding...

So, £760 minimum paid by each bridesmaid (plus, I assume, a wedding gift for the happy couple? Perhaps travel/ accommodation costs for some?).

This happened to my friend who was bridesmaid to her relatively close (but quite a "new" friend). The wedding was abroad (Ibiza). All the bridal party got ready together in the morning and it was only when my friend was actually sat having her hair and make up done that she was then told she would have to pay. She just went along with it as couldn't say no but her and her husband were quite put out by it and we all agreed it was such poor form.

The bride should always pay if they went her bridgemaids to look or dress a certain way!

Wow, see if my bridesmaids had already paid a large amount then I wouldn't have asked them to contribute towards make up. But I had forked out £700+ on the one family and gave her the option of doing her own make up if she didn't want to pay the make up artist. My DH has also just reminded me that the make up was £30 not £50 that I thought. But anyway she didn't want to pay but I was happy for her to do her own make up. Don't think I was being too unreasonable!

But I had forked out £700+ on the one family and gave her the option of doing her own make up if she didn't want to pay the make up artist.

You didn't 'fork out' as a lovely treat for them. It was your wedding and presumably you wanted them to wear said outfits. They're not going to be wearing the bridesmaid's dresses out clubbing are they?

you rock with that photo

But whenyouwish you chose the £700-worth of stuff that you wanted them to have. You make it sound like you were doing them a favour!