to not want to give up our dog?

[pinklemonade84]

We're currently on the local council housing list in a band c as we live with the in laws after moving back to the area after the death of my mum.

My health visitor wrote a letter in support of our housing application as she feels that the environment is not beneficial to dd's development or my mental health. I phoned housing a fortnight later and got through to some incredibly snotty man who made out that because I hadn't been able to complete a 45 minute call to refer myself for counselling and am currently just under the care of my gp that my health visitor was a liar.

The in laws have asked us to be out of here by the end of October and have written confirming that, which we had faxed over to the housing department yesterday.

I phoned to check it had been received and got through to the same man I have previously spoken to. And once again he started with an attitude because only half of the letter had been scanned across to them.

He then proceeded to lecture me about us not having applied for flats that had come up the previous week 45 minutes away. So I explained that we had a dog, that a lot of the flats only seem to take certain age groups and that we were hoping to stay in this area for family support due to dd being epileptic. He got quite patronising and said that we would have to start thinking of our options sooner rather than later and I asked if he was advising us to get rid of our dog to which he replied "I'm advising no such thing" and repeated what he said about thinking about our options. But, it was obvious what he was implying.

I came off the phone and relayed the conversation to my husband who went up the wall and said that when we phone a department for support we shouldn't be made to feel like the dirt beneath their feet.

This dog was bought for us by my mum as our joint christmas present back in 2012 and we adore him. I would eat beans on toast everyday to make sure he had his food if we ever got to a point of not being able to afford to feed him or keep him deflead etc. Aibu in not wanting to get rid of him and wanting to find housing that will allow us to keep him with us?

It depends how desperate you are. You really do have to consider your options. You need to bid on flats. 45 minutes is not that far If you have nowhere else to go.

I was homeless with chilsren with compwx needs. In a perfect world I would have loved one of the nice council houses in the suburbs. In reality we got a tiny flat in a grim inner city area. But I am eternally grateful that when I had no where else to go a home was provided.

It doesn't sound like consider your options means get rid of the dog.
It may mean moving out of the favoured area.
Considering a flat.
Yes you called for support but if he doesn't have all the letter and all the medical information that's got to make it harder for him too.

He's just trying to make you face facts.
If you have a dog and won't consider properties within a certain distance you will of course limit your options.
Perhaps you could privately rent, if the social options available to you don't suit?

We are trying to find something to private rent in the meantime (totally going against mil who is dead set on us getting social housing).

He only came out with the stuff about us considering our options when I said the flats that have been available recently would not accept pets.

The thing is though, we are opening up our options. We're considering local areas that we wouldn't have done previously because of the reputation that they have and we've agreed that if we get a place in one of them then we make the best of it. If any flats do come up in our area then of course I bid on them.

I should point out that we're not just angling for a new build in a desirable area. We just want to stay in this area or surrounding villages/towns and find somewhere to live that will accept our dog too

Sadly when it comes to private renting, very, very few will accept pets.
They can cause damage, either by chewing, scratching, going to the loo in the house and wrecking carpets, and a lot of landlords just won't take the chance as ofc all owners will try to assure them "Our dog is a sweetheart and isn't destructive". Some will be honest, others not so much.
Some landlords won't accept children, because they can also make lots of mess and cause damage.
Plenty others don't accept housing benefit as they get paid for the month after the month, not the month before like with private renting.

Not sure about council properties, but i think many of those won't accept dogs (or cats) either. It is really really shit, but a lot of people just don't want animals in their properties, which is understandable, but its awful for those who have no option but to rent, as you either lose what is essentially a family member, or can never get pets.

The flats don't seem to accept pets unless they're ground floor (which very rarely come up). But the houses do accept pets.

I wouldn't mind so much if we hadn't moved back to the area for family support. And we're now being pushed into applying for flats 45 minutes away that won't accept our dog. Which makes me feel like moving here for the support was pointless.

I sympathise with you. We were in this exact situation 4 yrs ago. We had to re-home our dog. The council persistently refused us... even when my MIL literally kicked us out when I was 38 weeks pregnant. We turned up at the council, me in tears heavily pregnant, all our belongings and the dog in the car. They offered me accommodation in a hostel but told DH he and the dog would have to look after themselves!

We had to pay on a credit card to stay in a b&b until we found a suitable private rental. Private landlords would not accept our dog. Only one would. We moved into that property but very quickly we started having issues with a leaky roof, dodgy plumbing, dangerous old electrical wiring, damp and mould.

To get a decent healthy safe house suitable for our newborn we had to make the tough decision to re-home our dog, because 99% of landlords wouldn't accept her.

I've said to dh I will NEVER have another pet until we can afford to buy our own home as I can't risk us/another lovely pet going through that trauma again.

Ime council housing allocations people aren't in the business of supporting you but of trying to put you off because then it's one less name on the list.

I hope the letter is now scanned properly and that they now prioritise you appropriately. If they don't, get onto your MP.

For bidding, they should tell you in writing how many bids a week you are expected to make and possibly where as well if you are permitted to specify areas. Stick to that. Get a copy of their allocations policy off the website and make sure you don't fall foul of it.

Lastly, you may find that even if it says no pets you can get away with it. I live in an HA block with a no pet rule and there are at least three dogs and a cat here. None of the owners let them foul in the communal areas or gardens so a blind eye is turned. Not saying it will be the same for you, but just that it happens here.

I guess what I'm saying is don't write it off because of one arsehole. They have a duty to house you and as long as you stick to what they say you have to do - that is, according to their policy re how many areas you look at, type of property etc - you may well find somewhere that you can take your dog. Certainly in the town I'm in there's more chance of that being the case in public housing than in private.

Surely the whole point of a bidding system is that you only bid for properties which suit your requirements? If the property doesn't allow pets then don't bid on it. However, my experience is similar to that described by thisarmingman, and as long as you are discreet with your pet you are likely to get away with keeping it even if the rules say otherwise.

Domino - it could be the case that you have to put in a certain number of bids a week (eg here if you're on band a you have to put in three a week but you can limit it to three areas) and because there are few available some of that number are unsuitable. That's why the OP has to find out exactly what's expected of her.

You do have to weigh up your options though and I mean this kindly!
You can't expect to be housed quickly, in the perfect house with a garden etc.
You're saying no to flats, nowhere that doesn't allow dogs and no to anywhere too far away. That limits your choices/limits what they can offer you. If you were in no rush to leave then be picky, but you have an October deadline so you need to decide what's more important?
Sometimes you can't be picky.

And I totally understand, I'm in a first floor 2 bed council flat, was in a one bed third floor council flat before this one. I would love a garden for DC. Id love to have a pet. I'd love a house. I'd love for the DC to have their own room. But I'm realistic. I'd still be in the old flat up 3 flights if I hadn't have taken this flat. I'm very lucky to have this flat, great neighbours, great location, good schools, near my work etc. You'll find yourself in a situation come October if you are told to leave pils (I'm sure they wouldn't chuck you out but after writing to the council they kind of need to follow it through to help you get somewhere?) and haven't found anything suitable with the council, you'll end up being put in bed and breakfast or hostel or 'temp' housing which could be a bedsit that you end up staying there for years.

Hope you get something sorted anyway. Would it be possible for pil to look after dog til you've been in somewhere for a few weeks and then sneak dog back? If anyone questions it you're dog sitting?

Good luck.

The notes on their system state why we moved back to the area. Ok, my mum was severely disabled, but she was a big support from dd's first seizure all the way to the day that she died. And although fil (in particular) drives me crazy, I can't deny that they have been a massive support

Thisarmingman that's actually how it came across that he was just trying to get rid of us off the list. He honestly seemed to be coming across as if he thought I was beneath him for even needing social housing.

The thing is I'm not saying no to flats. If one came up in this area that allowed us to keep the dog then I would be straight in bidding on it. There are always parks etc to take dd to. There are other flats that state you have to be a certain age to live there, which we haven't been able to bid on because of dd. The one thing I am objecting to is being told to bid on flats such a long distance away.

I think if push came to shove then pil would take the dog so that we could still see him everyday.

So, basically, you are saying that the way you see it is that you can only be housed in a house because of your dog?

I totally agree that you shouldn't get rid of the dog, but I think you may be coming across, possibly unintentionally, as saying "you have to house us in a house because we have a dog". Actually, they just have to house you in a home that allows dogs, be it flat or house.

Cross post, I think you just need to make it very clear your preference is any home that allows pets, and that area comes second to pets (or at least, it would for me).

The council won't care about distance. They only need to provide something safe and something else I've forgotten what. There is not much choice with social housing. Further away might not work out so bad anyway. After 18 months being 'further away' things are actually starting to work out much better than if we were nearer where we were originally.

Basically, if you are in an area where demand is incredibly high and you have a deadline to bid on a home, it is very much you get what you end up with.

There is unfortunately only a certain stock of housing. You will be homeless in three months. How likely is it that a house in the right area that allows dogs will come up? You do need to consider your options.

Wolfiefan I'm aware of how much housing there is out there. But you need to read my posts that say it DOESN'T have to be a house. I'm not insisting on a house. I'm trying to get us a property in this area that will accept our dog too

We also have a good consultant at the hospital that dd has been assigned to and if we moved to the area that was being suggested we would have to change hospitals and lose this consultant.

But it has to be a ground floor or a house in that area? Depending on housing stock and turnover you may not be offered anything.
I understand the consultant thing I really do but the council can't help that if things aren't available. Perhaps your consultant can refer you to a good colleague if it comes to that?

Perhaps If you were more specific about areas and the bidding system used it would help. As it is you just sound unreasonable and precious. And you are bidding against other people who probably also want a property in the same area and with a dog.

This is why the person at the council is dismissive.

I don't think you are understanding the situation you are in. How far away is the new are from the hospital? Have they said they will discharge you if you move? Do you need to tell them?

Do not do what someone else suggested which is sneak a pet in. If you do that with a HA it's a breach f contract and you may cock Up any introductory tenancy.

No it doesn't have to be a ground floor flat. Just one in this area (or not quite so far away) that would take the dog. We've agreed that we would make the best of it until we could put in for a swap/transfer.

I've just looked and allowing for traffic, it would be close to an hour away from our current hospital looking at google maps.

I do understand the situation we're in. Which is why I've agreed with my husband to open up our search to certain areas that we wouldn't have considered at the beginning of our application.

We're in the north west and the council operates a bidding system. As far as I'm aware we can bid on any number of eligible properties each week and they will be allocated based on priority

Well look. You've got till October so you can keep hedging your bets for a bit and maybe you'll get lucky. If not, you'll have to choose. Area or dog.

Private rental?
I wouldn't want to lose my pets either but I don't think the council has any duty to house them. Or place you in the area you really want.