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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Or is my neighbour a wanker?

358 replies

squirreltrap · 24/06/2017 23:26

I hate not getting on with my neighbours...I like to have them there as support but I've got an ishoo with my newish neighbour and AIBU?

So, there have been a few things...shouting at the kids for being noisy, and when I say shouting I mean shouting and always when I'm not there. I'm a SP if that makes any difference. He does this when I'm not there.

DS15 had some friends over a few weeks ago and they were in the garden and I saw him come up over the wall with a face of rage and he threw a can at them telling them to "shut the fuck up". I had warned him that the gathering was happening but they would be finished by 11 because I know he's noise sensitive. And I moved them inside (9.30) and he must have heard me do this so came knocking saying very nicely "don't move them because of me...don't want to ruin the party". But I'd seen him pop over the wall incandescent with rage so it didn't quite add up

Then today, DS12 went into his garden via a gap in the fence to get his football and found TWO BIN BAGS of footballs that were all ours.
The wall I talk about is something he built as soon as he moved in and had previously complained about DS12 kicking the ball against it and we took it and never did it since.

AIBU thinking what sort of wanker bags up footballs rather than just throw them back?
We live in a semi, you just have to deal with neighbours? It may sound like we are nightmares but the reality is the ds's play football in the garden once a week max, and that's discounting winter and rain, the ball goes over maybe once a month and so he's been storing these for over a year.

OP posts:
Gingerandgivingzerofucks · 24/06/2017 23:32

Your ds went into his garden?! I'd be incandescent too! Stop letting the dc throw bags full of balls over his fence. Are you being serious??

nocoolnamesleft · 24/06/2017 23:33

Um. If he's a newish neighbour, and already has 2 binbags of your kids' footballs, then it implies that they are coming into his garden with a very annoying degree of frequency...

FakePlasticTeaLeaves · 24/06/2017 23:35

The gathering/shouting and apologising is odd behaviour on his part, but does your DC just walk into his garden from yours? This could be a reason he's not so keen on them...

Nicknacky · 24/06/2017 23:35

Your son has kicked over two bin bags worth of footballs? I couldn't be bothered to give them back either, does you son go ask for them?

Not to mention your son going into their garden. My next door neighbours teens did that once with me. Needles to say they didn't do it again.

squirreltrap · 24/06/2017 23:36

Well, he had said that they could retrieve their ball but then barricaded up the gap

Not sure what you mean by letting the dc throw balls over his fence? The ball occasionally goes over and he's been hoarding them for over a year.

OP posts:
Trollspoopglitter · 24/06/2017 23:36

What sort of wanker who's home all day keeps buying her kids footballs and doesn't notice them being thrown over, or wonder where the hell 10-20 balls have gone?

Notknownatthisaddress · 24/06/2017 23:37

Agree with the others.

A bag of footballs when he is a newish neighbour. WTF?!

Some people have no clue how utterly irritating and frustrating their kids can be. Especially if they are constantly booting footballs into peoples gardens.

YABU.

TheCatOfAthenry · 24/06/2017 23:37

Identical twins? Grin

Nicknacky · 24/06/2017 23:37

Does your son politely go ask for them? Or just expect them to be kicked back despite them causing a nuisance/damaging plants?

Trollspoopglitter · 24/06/2017 23:38

...had said that they could retrieve their ball but then barricaded up the gap...

How is this not clear to an adult? Come ask him for them via front door, stop trespassing in his garden.

Nicknacky · 24/06/2017 23:38

No wonder he barricaded it up if it was happening so often.

ChicRock · 24/06/2017 23:38

You sound like the nightmare neighbour.

thecatsarecrazy · 24/06/2017 23:38

Any parks he can play in? After living next to boys,who constantly kicked balls against and over fence i can say its fucking annoying.

FakePlasticTeaLeaves · 24/06/2017 23:39

It is confusing. Did your son not knock and ask for them back? Didn't you wonder where all the balls had gone?

Notknownatthisaddress · 24/06/2017 23:39

Why were your kids going through the gap in the fence, into his garden?!

arsenalwatford · 24/06/2017 23:40

Wow. You sound like the kind of neighbour I am super glad I don't have.

squirreltrap · 24/06/2017 23:40

Home all day? Not sure what that means but I'm not anyway

He's lived in the house about 2.5 years

It's not like they are doing this everyday and since his outbursts the ds have been reluctant to go round or enter his garden

Today was the first time in over a year

OP posts:
Notknownatthisaddress · 24/06/2017 23:41

You didn't say he had given permission to come in the garden in your first post.

ArtemisiaGentilleschi · 24/06/2017 23:41

I'm with Chic on this one.
You and your kids sound awful.

Nicknacky · 24/06/2017 23:41

Why did your son go through bin bags that were in your neighbours garden?

Notknownatthisaddress · 24/06/2017 23:42

So now he has been there 2.5 years?

You said he was new-ish!

You're making it up as you go along!!!

squirreltrap · 24/06/2017 23:43

I'm deemed a nightmare neighbour because a ball goes over once a month

I must be then because I'd have no issue with this

Weird though that no one thinks throwing a can and swearing at kids isn't a bit odd, as well as shouting at the kids when I'm not there. AND being nice as pie to my face.

OP posts:
ArtemisiaGentilleschi · 24/06/2017 23:43

Does the fact your kids get bollocked for noise when you're not in make you wonder if they might be making a fuck lot of noise when you're not in?

GinSwigmore · 24/06/2017 23:43

Ooh. Maybe he lives in a Monster House and is protecting your son from being eaten alive by the ghost of his dead missus Shock

squirreltrap · 24/06/2017 23:44

I've been in the house 15 years so 2.5 years is quite new to me

OP posts: