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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Or is my neighbour a wanker?

358 replies

squirreltrap · 24/06/2017 23:26

I hate not getting on with my neighbours...I like to have them there as support but I've got an ishoo with my newish neighbour and AIBU?

So, there have been a few things...shouting at the kids for being noisy, and when I say shouting I mean shouting and always when I'm not there. I'm a SP if that makes any difference. He does this when I'm not there.

DS15 had some friends over a few weeks ago and they were in the garden and I saw him come up over the wall with a face of rage and he threw a can at them telling them to "shut the fuck up". I had warned him that the gathering was happening but they would be finished by 11 because I know he's noise sensitive. And I moved them inside (9.30) and he must have heard me do this so came knocking saying very nicely "don't move them because of me...don't want to ruin the party". But I'd seen him pop over the wall incandescent with rage so it didn't quite add up

Then today, DS12 went into his garden via a gap in the fence to get his football and found TWO BIN BAGS of footballs that were all ours.
The wall I talk about is something he built as soon as he moved in and had previously complained about DS12 kicking the ball against it and we took it and never did it since.

AIBU thinking what sort of wanker bags up footballs rather than just throw them back?
We live in a semi, you just have to deal with neighbours? It may sound like we are nightmares but the reality is the ds's play football in the garden once a week max, and that's discounting winter and rain, the ball goes over maybe once a month and so he's been storing these for over a year.

OP posts:
Original poster
squirreltrap · 24/06/2017 23:55

No, as I've said my kids don't make noise

And he has noise issues. To give an example, he says things like "so sorry if the bloody baby kept you up"

I reply "I'd be a bit of a nob if I was annoyed about a baby crying in the night"

OP posts:
PenguinOfDoom · 24/06/2017 23:55

I'd be furious with both you and your kids, firstly for allowing them to kick two whole bagfuls of balls over (you didn't notice this, seriously) then allowing your kids to trespass in my garden and poke around.

FFS, take a look at your own attitude and behaviour before calling your presumably long-suffering neighbour a wanker.

Original poster
squirreltrap · 24/06/2017 23:57

Wow, judgey or what on a few 15 year olds getting together til shock horror 11pm !!

OP posts:
Pigface1 · 24/06/2017 23:58

This has to be a wind-up

Nicknacky · 24/06/2017 23:58

Op, very few people have mentioned that but I can see that might be annoying for him also. Have more respect for your neighbour.

ChicRock · 24/06/2017 23:58

And he has noise issues. To give an example, he says things like "so sorry if the bloody baby kept you up"

That's not him having noise issues - that's him being a fucking considerate neighbour and apologising if his baby crying during the night disturbed you.

So he has a baby and your kids are out making noise in ten garden at 9.20pm?

This thread has to be a wind up, or you are just the biggest fucking arsehole.

Original poster
squirreltrap · 24/06/2017 23:59

Once a month is hardly a chore

As I've explained, they haven't wanted to go round because he's been nasty shouting at them and basically denying that to me. Just to confirm he's never once to my face said he has a problem with the kids, just does it to them

OP posts:
CatsInKilts · 24/06/2017 23:59

Your children have kicked 2 bin bags of footballs over into his garden.

They've gone into his garden, despite knowing that he had previously barricaded up the gap to stop this.

They've looked in bags on his private property.

I don't think it's the neighbour who is the problem here.

Tazerface · 24/06/2017 23:59

Well, it wouldn't bother me if a ball was kicked over every day tbh, if I'm out there I'd throw it back. No idea why people would get so het up about it.

Between our neighbours we were allowed as kids to just run in and collect if they weren't about. Wouldn't be possible where I live now but I don't see the issue assuming they're not messing about when in someone else's garden.

Nicknacky · 25/06/2017 00:01

So they should go to a park instead of repeatedly kicking them over! Seriously, can you not see this might be annoying?

DailyMailReadersAreThick · 25/06/2017 00:01

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 25/06/2017 00:01

Sorry but I'd hate a group of 15yo lads being in the garden til 11pm. Especially with a baby in the house! There's no force field around the garden, it's loud for the nearby houses and I'm guessing your son and his mates are actually speaking rather than passing notes or doing semaphore?

Not the least bit comparable to a crying baby

bigmac4me · 25/06/2017 00:02

Two bin bags full of balls and your neighbour has only lived there a year??? How many balls do you(or your children) buy???? Your children are very lucky, mine would have been banned from playing football had they lost two bin bags full, or one bin bag full come to that.

Original poster
squirreltrap · 25/06/2017 00:02

I understand it may be annoying, hence them not going round and faithfully waiting for him to throw them back, which he has said he would do also

OP posts:
Nicknacky · 25/06/2017 00:02

tazer to be fair, the kids have rummaged through his property and found the balls. I doubt anyone would be happy about that.

Original poster
squirreltrap · 25/06/2017 00:02

In what way do my kids sound like "little shits"?

OP posts:
Notknownatthisaddress · 25/06/2017 00:03

Why are you not answering the question as to why your kids were in the NEIGHBOUR'S garden rooting in bin bags?

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 25/06/2017 00:05

When we lived in a semi we also apologised for the crying baby to our neighbors who very politely said "oh we don't hear a thing" (definitely telling porkies as DD made noises only dogs hear). It's just the polite thing, if they'd had a problem there's very little we could've done. But you can tell teenage boys to stop carrying on in the garden, be it launching footballs or chatting with their mates.

I really don't think it's helpful to call the OP's children "little shits" though, if they been told by a parent that this behaviour is fine then that's what they likely believe!

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 25/06/2017 00:07

OP are the balls definitely all your son's? Maybe they're from the other side too, or maybe he runs a football club

Zoflorabore · 25/06/2017 00:07

To be fair to op I think it's unfair to say her kids sound like "little shits"
That's pretty low to say that.

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 25/06/2017 00:08

I understand it may be annoying, hence them not going round and faithfully waiting for him to throw them back, which he has said he would do also

They could have knocked and asked him to throw them back. Do they really expect him to be out in an instant to chuck them over?

SteppingOnToes · 25/06/2017 00:08

I'm another that thanks god that I don't live next to you... How can you not see that it is you that is being unreasonable?

DailyMailReadersAreThick · 25/06/2017 00:08

You're right - apologies to the kids. It isn't their fault they have a mother teaching them anti-social behaviour.

Notknownatthisaddress · 25/06/2017 00:08

I don't believe your boys make no noise.

Why are they out playing in the garden (making noise) at 11pm?

Why are you not answering the question as to why your kids were in the NEIGHBOUR'S garden rooting in bin bags?

Notknownatthisaddress · 25/06/2017 00:09

I don't believe your boys make no noise.

Why are they out playing in the garden (making noise) at 11pm?

Why are you not answering the question as to why your kids were in the NEIGHBOUR'S garden rooting in bin bags?