WIBU to name my daughter my cousin's name, when my aunt doesn't want me to?

[PartyPooper16]

Not looking for opinions on the name.

My daughter is due in 3 weeks and we both absolutely love Madison/Maddie.

My cousin is called Maddison/Maddie. She is now almost 12. She has ASD and my aunt thinks she will struggle with the idea of them having the same name.

We are all really close and I'd hate for this to come between us, but we really can't agree on any other name and just love it.

My aunt has said "do what you want, but I honestly would rather you didn't".

WIBU?

Your Aunt sounds as if she put her view across very politely, she must be in a difficult position.

I think yabu, but clearly it's your call.

Some of the replies on here are so aggressive.

And obviously your Aunt's assessment of whether her dd will struggle with the situation is the only one that will have any accuracy.

And on that note I suppose I should go have a wank, whilst I'm doing the lotus position, because apparently, I'm sooooooooo angry! 🙄

So glad you can recognise it too. Your long winded rants and over investment is most bizarre.

Calm down notknow - it might help to remember that this doesn't affect you.

Is Madison the current trendy name? Someone in another thread was on about baby Madison.
Giving your baby the same name as your cousin's baby sounds unimaginative, especially if every class will have 2 of them, but if the cousins don't meet much it won't matter. When I was young I used to meet up with my cousins several times a year though and as I was the younger female cousin would have felt like a copycat if I'd had the same name as my 1 year older cousin. A bit like thing 1 and thing 2.

notknown

My son has ASD and happens to have a cousin who's first name is the same as his middle name. this upset him a lot, i can tell you that for a fact. So much so that even 10 years later if someone uses his middle name for any reason he gets very very agitated and upset and wants it taken off his birth certificate.

So, yes, it can cause all manner of issues, and thats just a middle name!

Haven't read through all the comments so sorry if someone else has posted this already. Perhaps you could give your daughter Madison as a middle name, and still call her Maddie at home/when your cousin isn't around e.g. to your friends who don't know or interact with your family. Other relatives could call her by whatever you now decide to give her as a first name (especially around your cousin). I'm sure if you made it clear to your daughter growing up that she has two names, and that some people e.g. yourself will use one name (Maddie), and that others e.g. extended family members, and teachers, would use the other name, she would understand, and probably find it completely normal as she won't know any different. If you did this she may even decide as she gets older that she prefers going by Maddie, and essentially you'd get what you wanted anyway, while being respectful to your aunt's/cousin's feelings!

I wouldn't choose a name the same as a family member but my son has the same name as my brother'n'laws new step son. So we refer to the younger child as little xxxx to avoid confusion. Although when calling or speaking directly to little xxxx we drop the 'little' obviously.

Oh gosh, just trying to help as OP had said she was looking for alternatives now.

Cassidy or Mackenzie, if you like the surname style?