Naughtiest thing you've done...

[Maxandrubyrubyandmax]

Sod the manefestos this is the thing we need to know about our potential leaders. TM trashed a farmers livelihood, jezza was so sick and depraved he can't talk about it! (Might be paraphrasing) AIBU to ask you to put naughty them both with your naughty tales. Best poster should obviously get the keys to number 10

Gosh

Gosh

Gosh

Well I (mentally scrolls through least offensive possibilities, edits out the good ones) I once looked the wrong way at a policeman. Would never have happened to Smeaton. An old Leodensian.

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Shoplifted as a middle-aged woman, for the kicks 😳

Mines too naughty to say

I'd love to know what was actually going through TM's head when that question was asked.

So much stammering and goshing, surely there must have been something more titilating than walking through a wheat field.

I would like to know what Corbyn has done as well.

Raided Snoop Dogg's booze rider at a festival! Bottle of champagne and rum!

Ok I admit I stole 4 bottles of champagne from work.

And I've shoplifted.

The probably the naughtiest thing.

birds the twinkle in his eyes suggests that he's done it multiple times.

run through multiple fields of wheat do you think ?

Once... I didn't stand still and hold the handrail whilst travelling on the travelator. I let go. AND... I wriggled.

I'm supposed to throw away any mops after one use at work..I dont,I take them home, bleach them and use them!

Mwhahaha! I'm such a baddass

I'm imagining you on CCTV with dirty mops under your arms!

I crashed my mom's car

Still feel awful, and it was 13 years ago.

I started a rumour that my mum's friend had an affair with Antony Worrel Thompson. It spread round our small town like wildfire

Oh actually. I pissed in someone's wine. They were a cunt. I feel no guilt.

When the Costa Coffee Club card system was broken a few weeks ago I trawled one store and scooped up all the discarded receipts. When the system was back in action I presented all the receipts to mein Barista and claimed about seventy extra points for my card. My free cappuccino came early in May.

OK, it's scarcely naughty but it's no one's loss and some cunt else would likely have done the same anyways.

I was once jolly affronted to be accused of being a prostitute by a policeman and told everyone that the policeman was horrible and I was considering making a complaint.
The policeman - wrongly - thought I was a prostitute because I was 'loitering' outside a pub in a dodgy part of town.
I wasn't 'loitering'. I was finishing my joint!

As a waitress I had sex with a chef after service had finished on a customer table. (The restaurant was empty bar us two).

Oh I had sex with another teacher in the car park after a little party.

Not in a car. Up against the wall. The wall with a bright light on it when the dozy caretaker walked past.

This is a funny thread

I have had an affair

I have walked out of a restaurant without paying

I once stole a Sooty magazine - as an adult

I had sex in a church when I was a teenager. It was with my boyfriend who sang in the choir

I once met a group of celebrities at a party. Was too shy to talk to celebrity A so told celebrity B that A had been rude to me (he hadn't obviously). Celebrity B then jokingly berated A, who couldn't apologise enough, and I ended up spending all evening talking to them both. More cheeky than naughty.

My teenage sister (10 years ago) ordered a set of wedding stationary for herself and John Terry from John Lewis using my dad's credit card.