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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Should I tell him to go fuck himself?

215 replies

DarrellRivers70 · 22/05/2017 03:17

Can't sleep, totally pissed off
Relatively new relationship, he's been away working, usually see each other on a Monday
We were messaging yesterday morning and I asked would we see each today
He said "yes we'll arrange it later have to go"
Still waiting to hear from him, it's pissed of right off, it's my day off tomorrow and could have made other plans
So aibu for feeling like this ? I have form for
Over thinking things but I would expect to confirm plans
I'll probably get a message in the morning but didn't want to chase him

OP posts:
BandeauSally · 22/05/2017 13:09

he's said he's totally fallen for me and it's gone way beyond anything physical for him

I hope you burst out laughing in his face when he spun you that ridiculous line? Grin

I would think I'm being played but the no sex is making me doubt myself as surely he would be trying to get into my knickers?

No it means he is still convincing himself he isn't actually cheating on his wife/fiancée/girlfriend because he hasn't had sex with you. Or he has had a herpes flare up and is waiting til it does down again.

heateallthebuns · 22/05/2017 14:06

What is the fetish? It would be easier to advise if we knew that as it might have some bearing on his behaviour.

SweetLuck · 22/05/2017 14:28

I don't think that it really matters what the fetish is. Whar matters is that the OP isn't happy with the way he behaves, and that is true regardless.

Original poster
DarrellRivers70 · 22/05/2017 14:47

I've just had a conversation with him and told him it's over, I feel so upset

OP posts:
streetface · 22/05/2017 14:52

When a man really likes you he puts you before anything and goes out of his way to text / call and see you.

Sorry, he is just not that into you. Move on.

paddlenorapaddle · 22/05/2017 14:58

Is he married ?

SkyBluePinkToday · 22/05/2017 14:59

Did he recognise the problem when you spoke to him?

Original poster
DarrellRivers70 · 22/05/2017 15:04

No he didn't and in fact when I said I was upset his response was "dry your eyes"

OP posts:
BandeauSally · 22/05/2017 15:05

What a dick. Tells you all you need to know doesn't it?

Original poster
DarrellRivers70 · 22/05/2017 15:06

I'm

OP posts:
Original poster
DarrellRivers70 · 22/05/2017 15:07

I'm afraid I got a bit upset and emotional
Still at least I know what he really thinks of me

OP posts:
Plumkettle · 22/05/2017 15:08

Wow, what a bellend OP.

Definitely dodged a bullet there

Huskylover1 · 22/05/2017 15:27

he's said he's totally fallen for me and it's gone way beyond anything physical for him

Translation : I can't get it up.

redshoeblueshoe · 22/05/2017 15:28

You should be pleased - he has shown you - he is a twat.
Lucky escape there

Original poster
DarrellRivers70 · 22/05/2017 15:29

I'm so fucking upset!!! I know I've dodged a bullet but it doesn't stop it hurting

OP posts:
manueltowers · 22/05/2017 15:29

Sounds like you're well-rid OP.

At least you didn't waste any more time on such a twat.

manueltowers · 22/05/2017 15:30

X-post.

Of course it doesn't stop it hurting, but at least you got out now before you got even more invested in someone who clearly isn't that interested.

Sionella · 22/05/2017 15:32

Urgh, what a dick. I think what you can take from this is that you would like to meet someone nice, OP. No judgment on the fetish site, but you might meet someone who is looking for a bit more on a different type of site?

Another cracking read for when you're upset: "it's called a break-up because it's broken". I learned a lot from that too. Favourite quote about why you don't stay friends - "Personally when I choose my friends, I prefer the ones who don't make me cry myself to sleep at night."

Mustang27 · 22/05/2017 15:45

Dry your eyes?!? Yeah on your burning body you ass hole.

What a twat if he liked you even a tiny bit he would have never reacted like that even if he was mad you were calling it a day.

LagunaBubbles · 22/05/2017 15:46

Well done OP.

Original poster
DarrellRivers70 · 22/05/2017 15:55

The dry your eyes bit was the final straw, oh it's just shit, getting made redundant next week too, life is crap just now

OP posts:
FrenchJunebug · 22/05/2017 16:44

Make plans and DO NOT wait on him to call you back.

SpitefulMidLifeAnimal · 22/05/2017 16:46

Darrell, I promise you that there is both a better man AND a better job out there for you. Hang in there Flowers

Thebluedog · 22/05/2017 16:53

Just text him back and say 'am I seeing you tomorrow or not?'

That way you know, if he doesn't es t give you a definite answer tell him you'll make other plans as it's your day off and you won't spend it waiting around for him to make his mine up.

I hate these games whilst dating, why can't people be straight forward and up front...

With the right person it's easy, and you never have to second guess

Thebluedog · 22/05/2017 16:53

Sorry for the typos Confused