Does anyone NOT regret having kids?!

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Just recently I’ve noticed an influx of threads where parents have admitted that they regret having children and the negative impact it has had on their lives. I was surprised how many people feel this way, especially when social media is full of posts from parents glamorising parenthood and telling us all how amazing it is (call me naïve but having not had children myself - I tended to believe them!)

I have to say, as someone who was desperately looking forward to parenthood, I’m concerned …. Is it really that bad?!

Love every minute of it. Just wish I'd had kids sooner so we could have more than one.

Think there has been only one thread OP and the responses were quite mixed.

Ultimately- it's not glamorous unless you have a nanny.

Aside from that if it's what you and your partner want and you are fair about how you share the work you won't regret it. Not even on your hardest day.

If it's not what you or don't hard a partner who pulls there weight it will feel like hard work.

I don't think i am particularly maternal but i just cannot imagine my life without children in it. Not having them never seemed to be an option for some reason. I am a foster mum too so a glutton for punishment.

I've never regretted it for a moment.
I get sick of them quite a lot on some days (!) but that's just in a particular moment. The wider picture is that they're the best thing in the world to me.

Not for a second not once.

I would advise anyone - don't wish away those you love, ever.

I've never regretted it, how could I? Ds is smart, funny, and makes my world go round, and he is coming home for the summer after his degree course ends. He drives me mad at times, but then, that's life.

I struggle to understand why people think there's no time off when you're a parent. What does that mean? Is that because you work and have kids ? Honest question.

I do feel like there's no time "off" at the moment - although obviously I can have fun and breaks with my DC, there's very little time when I can do exactly what I would like to do if I had a free choice. I work, I'm self-employed so if I don't work I don't get paid. I'm a single parent and have the kids most of the time. When I'm not working, I'm doing school runs, housework, shopping, childcare, homework supervision and domestic admin. When their dad has them overnight I basically catch up on work and housework. In theory I could have a night out but have done that only twice in the past year - there's always too much else to fit in. Once in a while I take a day off and go to the shops while they're at school - so that is time off, but costs me a lot in terms of missed work so it's hardly ever.

No family support at all. They do sometimes go to play at friend's houses but hardly ever at the same time. I sometimes go away for work, but that depends on exP's goodwill and at the moment I don't feel I can push it by also going away on my own for a break.

I'm just holding out for when they're teenagers to get a bit more free time.

And tbh I do fully accept that I shouldn't moan because I chose this and chose to have kids. But I didn't realise how unsupportive my (now ex) DP would be, and I didn't realise how exhausting it would be.

I'm not really ready to date but I have looked at some dating sites out of interest. The men all say they love the outdoors, weekend city breaks, strolling along beaches, watching old movies, eating out etc etc etc. - even when they have DC. I just think "well that's nice for you!" There's no way I could have a relationship as I'd have hardly any time to spend doing relationship-y stuff.

I think having kids does change your life so much and can make life harder. I think it's a decision that needs a lot of consideration. I think if you rush into it you might end up regretting it. I waited years until I was in a position where I was ready- wish I'd done it a little earlier now )

Mislou I get what you're saying but my dd1 had no consideration - she was a significant surprise and I was far from ready. She's 4.5 now and I don't regret one single thing about having her, im so glad she made an appearance when she did and have since had another.

Having kids is undoubtedly the best thing ever :-) also most exhausting!

I would recommend the blogs:

Hurrah for gin
The unmumsy mum
Peter and Jane and mummy too

Proper reflection of what it's like but still loving :-) good luck in your journey :-)

There is nothing I regret about having my dd. Life is very different now, but so much happier. We struggled to conceive so will only have one, theres nothing about having her I regret, except the fact she was born prematurely, I dearly wish that hadn't happened but having her, no I couldn't ever regret that.

I don't regret my 2 girls at all-ever . They are amazing, wonderful girls who will contribute to the world in a positive way . A life without children would have been a hard vision or reality for me .
They are the centre of my universe and the core love of my life 😁💘

Never regretted it for one second.

I was late to motherhood, and before that I had a great career, big income, company car large expense account, lots of travel, exotic holidays, eating out at fancy restaurants, exotic holidays. I was happy.

Since having kids I am 100 times happier. Less money but having my kids have been a transformation.
So as my kids are on the brink of adulthood and will fly soon I will have been transformed by motherhood permanently.

I have found inner strength, patience, tolerance, become more assertive, come to know more or what it is to be human.
Having children has opened a window to understand others and myself.
I love my kids, but I also love what being a mother has done to me.

Absolutely no regrets. I would not have missed this experience for the world.

I regret not having my kids when I was younger, I was early 30's and have 2.

Westray
Yes to becoming more assertive! I am a better, nicer, more confident, more assured person since having kids.

We never wanted children - DS was a complete surprise (well you know, we kind of knew what caused it) and then we thought in for a penny, in for a pound and had DD within 2 years. I hated the first couple of years when I had both of them, hated it. I didn't hate them, I loved them with an all consuming passion but I was totally sure that we'd done the wrong thing, that we would never have time together as a couple again, that my life would be a dull round of drudgery and tiredness forever.

It's not, it's really not. As they have got older, they have brought more fun, laughter, wisdom and joy than I ever thought possible. I'm sorry, I know that sounds totally wanky but there we go. I never thought I would enjoy having children but I do. I can't imagine my life without them. I still maintain DH and I would have been happy without them too but we are very happy with them.

Slush fest over - as you were.

I have five girls (the youngest is 16, the eldest 26) and no, I don't regret having them. When the first three were small we were in a difficult situation (not because of them I mean) but my children were my own secret garden, they made my life worth while. They were what got me through.

Admittedly when pg with the 4th, and having morning sickness, I thought, "why did I want to do this?" But that passed and she was such a wonderful baby. And an amazing young woman now.

Not that it's all roses, but I love having these people in my life.

Having them was five of the best things I've ever done.