- men coming on MN?

[iwantedaSindywardrobe]

Now I have no problem with men coming on here and declaring that they are men but seeking a female perspective on something. But there seem to be men who lurk and men who post pretending to be women on here.

I've read a few posts recently where there have been quite a lot of misogynistic comments (not saying women can't be like that) and some of those posters are clearly men. Mostly posts about how how women and girls are subject to sexually inappropriate or manipulative behaviour by males.

Why are men coming on here and doing this? It's a public forum, I get that, but it would never cross my mind to go on a DadsNet or equivalent forum pretending to be a man just to slate men and their particular experiences.

Is it just me who finds this odd and creepy?

[Butteredparsnip1ps]

Men posting here ..fine

Absuive misogynist men..not so fine

This. Reader, it's just online chat.

[SoupDragon]

And yes they might declare they are men and go on to mansplain

And if they had not declared they were men, would it still be "mansplaining"?

I do find it interesting, and nasty, how some posters' attitudes and language changes when they realise a poster is a man.

What is also interesting is that this thread has people suggesting the men should identify themselves as male but, whenthey do that, they are often treated poorly and accused of "mansplaining"

As an aside, I loathe theterm "mansplaining".

[TizzyDongue]

And yes they might declare they are men and go on to mansplain
And if they had not declared they were men, would it still be "mansplaining"?

Try reading my next sentence?

[JustAnotherSilentOldNumber]

TizzyDongue

I was agreeing with you.... no need to be sarcastic.

[Quimby]

"I would like to ask the male posters something. Do you feel that being on Mumsnet has opened your eyes to the everyday sexism that females live with"



It definitely has and it's also influenced the way I analyse or interpret stories in the news.
It also made me aware of some negative (imho) aspects of feminist theory when I first joined before the feminist section went to shit due to being 99% trolls or trans debates.

So like anything, swings and roundabouts.

Childless make why's been here about 10 years and is still bitter about losing my nickname when the place got hacked

Mayorquimby RIP

[SashaFiercesMum]

We're all visiting here LateDad. You have as much right to be on here as us mum's. Fwiw I like the balance of dad's/mum's viewpoints & would like to see more dad's on here.

Hmmm...Wonder if I could gatecrash a Dad's Forum?🤔

[Quimby]

*childless male who's


I blame the typos on the hour of the day

[VintagePerfumista]

Oh MayorQuimby! Hello!

Can't you put a zero in instead of the o or something?

^^^ see, folks, this is a normal MNer. Might be a man, might be a jedi, might be a woman pretending to be a man pretending to be a women pretending etc etc.

A common-or-garden MNer. Doesn't matter that he's a bloke, it really doesn't.

[Quimby]

That might be an idea.

TBH I've changed my moniker so many times since then because every 6 months or so my phone randomly signs me out and I can never remember what email address or password I used to set up the account.

Next time this happens I'll come back as May0rquimby

[RufusTheRenegadeReindeer]

zaphod

Why specifically do you think that zaphod is a give away that you are a man?

Thats what posters are commenting on

Its either because you think that only a man would use a mans name as a nickname...which is dumb

Or

You think that women dont know who zaphod is ... which is dumber

He obviously invented the pan galactic gargle blaster

[Livelovebehappy]

But it's mumsnet. I know I'm stating the obvious, but IRL women who have issues prefer to discuss them with women, as it's assumed women might have gone through something similar. It would just be irrelevant to get a male perspective as men are different in every way; i.e. Emotionally and thought processes. As previous posters have said, men need to disclose they're male when posting, so that women can see where they might be coming from.

[RufusTheRenegadeReindeer]

I have seen men being very very careful not to admit that they are men

It doesn't and shouldn't matter on a bog standard thread but the very few times i have seen it has been on an emotive thread concerning womens rights

I can only remember one name in particular

[DameDeDoubtance]

I have seen some "women" who live in reverse land, they only know men who have experienced dv, they have only ever seen men being sexually objectified, the men in their world are underpaid and do all the housework, weird really.

[PerspicaciaTick]

I like most of the men who post on MN, although I don't put much (any) effort into spotting men so I wouldn't necessarily realise a post is by a man. The more interesting, engaged voices, the better IMO.

Male trolls are as annoying as female trolls - neither are welcome on MN.

[PerspicaciaTick]

Of course men don't need to constantly tell everyone they are men. Why on earth would it be relevant on 99% of threads.
"As a man, my child's lunchbox contains hummus and an orange",
"Speaking as a man, I always follow the arrows on the road when deciding how to approach a roundabout",
"We take an Icytek on camping holidays - but I should let you know I'm a man",
"I am a man and I usually ignore a tantrumming toddler and then comfort then when they are calmer".
"Your DH is being abusive and I am a man".

In what way does knowing the poster is a man help? At best it is a redundant information, at worst it makes him sound like he thinks being a man makes his opinion more important.

[BadLad]

I keep reading this forum because some of the discussions are interesting, and some of them are hilarious. For entertainment, basically. I don't read parts that don't interest me - ttc, for example.

Occasionally I read something that tempts me to post.

Hopefully my username makes my being a man obvious.

[GinAndTunic]

This is a forum for parents so, yes, having men post here is perfectly fine.

[NotYoda]

I agree with Perspicacia

I do think, though, that many of the trolls we have on here are men, precisely because it's a forum where women are generally pretty outspoken, witty and supportive of each other, and these kinds of men don't much like that

[donquixotedelamancha]

"I'm not sure why a man would want to join a forum called mumsnet."

Because I became a parent; I was looking for advice and resources. It seems obvious why I might choose a site 'by parents, for parents'. In fact the adoption sub forum (where I usually loiter) is really the only active UK one.

I really am bemused that a few posters think it would be OK/reasonable/possible to get rid of the men. I'm equally bemused by generalisations about 3.5 billion people (me do this....).

[ExplodedCloud]

I think it's absolutely fine to have men posting. Unless of course they're twats. In which case, no.
Simple really.

[PovertyPain]

Thank you for answering, Quimby.

I have seen some posters giving 'a man's viewpoint' and whilst some of it is nonsense, it may have been beneficial to some posters. I'm thinking along the lines of an abused female who struggles to see if the abuser's behaviour is 'normal male reaction'. In those cases it may be helpful for a man to say "hell no!" Obviously there will be many, many female posters telling her the same thing but the op may be so battered down, hearing from a decent man too, can help. I hope I'm explaining this properly.

[NotYoda]

Poverty

I agree with that. And I think it's a shame of that sort of comment is jumped on.

[ChazsBrilliantAttitude]

Like others I have no issue with men posting. A lot of topics benefit from a wide range of views.
I do have an issue with Goady Fuckers whatever there sex.