This is more of a wtf post than AIBU. Have name changed too.
This morning at about 7.20 I get out of bed and approach her bedroom door with no clothes on to ask 17 year old dd ( who is dressed) to answer the front door bell. As she comes out of her room, I glimpse a lad standing there! He also sees me in all my naked glory!
I'm so shocked, I say 'is there someone in your room?' to which she says 'No' although there is no doubt there is a person, so this is lie number 1. I retreat, still being naked, and tell her to get him out of the house immediately, which she does. It turns out that it's a lad she met last summer, that she had a flirtation with, and that she still talks to on Instagram etc. I'll call him Barney. He lives about 15 miles way, but is at college in our town. She tells me that he called by this morning having spent the night at a friends house nearby. I wasn't sure whether I believed this, but she assures me she was telling the truth. I don't really believe her. I have a shout at her for not telling me that there's someone in the house as it's not unusual for me to walk around with no clothes etc, although usually I get up after she's left the house to go to college.
Anyway, I now think he arrived at our house last night, as she closed the curtains at the back just before she went to bed at about 11pm, which she has never done. We live in a ground floor flat and there's a door from her bedroom into the garden which can be accessed from the side of the house. She never uses this door and tends to clutter up the entrance to it, but having just been into her room now, the access is clear, there's a few leaves inside, and the door is unlocked! What's more, the key isn't in the lock where it always is kept, as it's a fire exit, if ever needed. I'm now wondering if this is a regular occurrence and how long it's been going on, and whether he has the door key! We were away for a long weekend, and I'm even wondering if he was here while we were away!
I'm so upset that dd has been so devious and also lied to me. She's been a pretty trouble free teenager up to now, but this feels so disrespectful to me, and has also compromised the security of our home, by leaving the door unlocked today.
Any thoughts please on how best to handle this with her?
AIBU?
Fuming at DD's unexpected visitor
bloodyfuming9 · 15/03/2017 14:46
I'm amazed and a little saddened by the number of people who think seeing a naked human body is so traumatic, especially when it is a member of your immediate family and the same sex.
I wonder if people whose jobs involve seeing others naked need special counselling sessions to manage their distress 
Expat "even had sex in their bed because mine was a single".
Ahem. I'm saying nothing!
If it makes you feel any better a colleague of mine recently woke up in the early hours of the morning with the dawning realisation that there was somebody in her bed. She turned over, realised it was some random bloke, and started screaming her head off. Turned out it was her daughter's ONS who'd got lost on the way back from the bathroom
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As my colleague tells it, the bloke was more horrified than she was
YABU, you of course should remain unaware about who sleeps unknowingly in your house, and I am shocked that you are upset about the fact that your dad has lost the back door key and has left it open when she has been out. In the name of liberal parenting, you should be okay with these things OP! Accept being burgled because she is allowed to have relationships that you don't need to know about.
Seriously, I am at some of the responses on here.
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