Ward visitor snoring all night

[MrsNuckyThompson]

Am staying on post-natal ward after a section and also DD has a little jaundice. Just done my second night. There are three other beds and the occupants of one are a couple with what I'd guess is their first DC. Pretty sure she's also had a section.

I'm about to kill the husband. He snored loudly through most of last night and is still going. He did the same the night before. If a patient was snoring I'd just sort of put that down to my bad luck. But at this point I feel he IBU in putting all the people on the ward who are in actual need of rest and recuperation through that ridiculous level of noise.

What irked me even more was that their baby was really upset and cried a lot in the night and his wife his having trouble feeding. But instead of getting up to help or do anything he just snored through the whole thing - so why is he even here?? Not like he's stayed the night to support her!!

AIBU to think he deserves to be permanently excluded from nights on the ward??

When I had my DD who is now 15 they didn't allow partners to stay on the wards overnight but the woman in the bed opposite snored like a trooper.

She had been in the hospital for a few months because of complications and had lost other babies. She was very friendly but one night after she had her baby she was snoring away so loudly she didn't hear her baby crying and in the end I got out of bed and woke her up to tell her the baby was screaming. She shouted at me "I know, I can hear him". In the morning she apologised for shouting and admitted that she hadn't heard the baby at all! We had a good laugh about it. Thankfully I went home the next day.

I can't believe women in their most vulnerable state have to put up with a load of blokes in hospital. You'd actually have to have your own bloke/mum/friend there just to look after you if that's the case.

When I ran a bf group it was women-only because mothers needed to feel comfortable enough to try and latch a baby on - it's so intimate. It's crucial that postnatal wards are calm supportive spaces to help women start bf let alone recover from childbirth.

There really aren't any safe spaces for women anymore.

I would have welcomed a nice rhythmic snoring instead of the last time I was in hospital after a fall, with one woman next to me saying 'help' intermittently 24/7 just loud enough to keep everyone awake and a woman in the opposite corner banging on the table with anything that would make the most noise and screaming that she was going to take a nurse to Italy, take him on her boat and then drown him. After being on traction for eight weeks and having these 2 ladies on my ward I was about ready for the funny farm by the time I came home

I also don't understand the bonding needed from day one.. My DS has jaundice and was under a light box. It wasn't till he was out of light box. we got time to bond properly. ( ex was in the pub celebrating) . We had no bonding issues..

The issues of people needing more help is because we need more staff on the wards.

I think its a bad idea having partners on the ward

I had a c section at 12pm by 1pm the next day i left the hospital because the women next to me snored...sounded like an animal being slaughtered

I would have hated male strangers being on the ward-I would have felt v uncomfortable. It was bad enough being in hospital as it was.

I would make a formal complaint. That is fucking ridiculous.

I would be making a very, very loud complaint.

So is the loud snoring waste of space father actually going to be kicked out tonight, or will this be his third night disturbing everyone on the ward?
Oh third night, so his sleep trumps that of everyone else on the ward?

Then all night long I would be a pita patient and ask the ward staff to give him a kick everytime he snored.

I wouldn't be silently seething about this. I would be making it known it is not on and that he is doing fuck all apart from disturbing others sleep.

Blinkin eck I didn't know this was even a thing although come to think of it after DD3 was born there was a man who never seemed to go home. Maybe he was sleeping there. I was so glad when they left, I was not very well and their baby literally cried all night.

I can't believe the nursing staff are unaware of the situation , but they are probably unsupported if they asked partners to modify their noise or sleep elsewhere. It's a case where new mothers are being let down. Maybe mothers can alert the local press,local m.p, and start a campaign to improve the status of new mothers in hospital.

So many people are just inconsiderate. I was at the ante natal clinic the other day and it was packed out, more patients than seats. Grown men and non pregnant female friends and relatives of patients were happily sitting about while heavily pregnant women were standing waiting for a seat.

The staff aren't unaware of the situation at all - they encourage it because it means the mundane stuff like getting food, water, helping someone to the loo, giving baby to mum, etc is taken care of without them needing to be involved. Hospitals are horribly understaffed these days, many have hundreds of unfilled vacancies, and because of the strain on the staff that are left they all hate their jobs and leave if they can. It's become a vicious circle. We need to train and retain thousands more doctors, nurses and medical helpers. Because salaries are low and working conditions in NHS hospitals are crap they lose staff all the time. And when we leave the EU we risk losing the many doctors and nurses from there who currently work in the NHS.

Exactly juneau - it's because they need the men to come and do the things the nursing staff are too busy to do.

I can't believe so many people are anti partners staying over, it would be such a lonely horrible time without support. I couldn't sit up unaided and don't know how's I would have managed without my partner there, he stayed all three days, so did other women's - it was nice for people not to be alone. My partner started snoring once, I woke him immediately and then he stopped, mega embarrassed. Each bed is curtained off, I don't see what the problem is. Fathers deserve to be with their child the first few nights of their lives, it's their right. But snoring should be stopped yes, agree with that ! Just give them a kick or if it's chronic send home.

I am anti partner staying too. All the campaigning for single sex wards for dignity of patients and we have to put up with someone else's oaf of a partner there.

On my ward it was the other mothers making all the noise, the men were pretty much silent and I barely saw them. Hospital wards are awful anyway, I wouldn't have coped without my partners help

So many people are just inconsiderate. I was at the ante natal clinic the other day and it was packed out, more patients than seats. Grown men and non pregnant female friends and relatives of patients were happily sitting about while heavily pregnant women were standing waiting for a seat

That was my experience too, years ago. Lots of partners/husbands making pregnant women stand

Are not all beds curtained off? If thas the case I am see the point, but if no one can see each other what's the issue?

Nope I had an emergency c section and could barely move, needed to be passed the baby when he woke, nurses aren't always nearby

And nothing to do with sex, if I had a female partner I'd feel the same.

'Fathers deserve to be with their child the first few nights of their lives, it's their right'

Do you have any documentary evidence of the rights of the father to stay on the ward?

When I'm in a post natal ward post C section I am the patient and it is my right to privacy and dignity. I should be able to sleep with the curtain open so the midwife can carry out their checks without the risk of exposing myself to a visitor.

If a person wants an overnight visitor they should pay to go private. My rights as a patient should trump the rights of a hospital visitor.