to think MIL could have been a bit happier about baby news?

[LondonMum79]

Told MIL today that baby no.3 is on the way. She made a face like thunder, and said "Oh ***. Well, it's your own business." And then she completely changed the subject.
It has left me feeling really upset but DH thinks I should just suck it up.

I can see quite a few MIL's had a reaction quite similar, when DH told MIL that I was pregnant she said 'Oh No, what are you going to do?' as if I was a teenager pregnant after a one night stand. She just couldn't bring herself to be happy for us and has never really had any interest in the baby, who is now 11 and has next to no relationship with her. Her loss.

My fil ignored bil and sil for a week when they announced baby no 3 was on the way . Mind you, he gives my bil an allowance to help out as bil doesn't earn much so he might have a right to an opinion!

Pretty sure MIL are sent to make our life's hellish... well mine certainly was

^ indeed shame no one warns you about the buggers before you fall in love with the man, I think we need to vet mum first.

Pretty sure they seem quite normal before you marry their beloved sons and steal them away!
Then the change begins.....

I've told this on here before. When we told MIL that I was pregnant I was 39, we'd been together for a long time, but planned not to have children for most of that she said, without missing a beat, 'An only is a lonely!'

Congrats!

When we told my PILs- MIL said to DH is this really what you want and FIL stormed off in a huff.

We were married and had been together 7 years at this point 🙄

Congratulations OP -- I always find pregnancy announcements exciting and wish I could do it all again. Felt like putting a bandage round my head to stop my jaw hitting the floor reading all those terrible PIL comments. Looks like if they had their way the birth rate would really drop. Maybe the miserable gits wished they hadn't had children themselves?

Huge congrats, OP.

Lucky me no longer had a MIL by the time I was expecting DD3.

Nor a FIL, but he was lovely.

When I got pregnant with DD1, DF, when told, asked me 'how did that happen?' I had been married for 3 years, so not like it was a one night stand. When I then got pregnant with DD2, he was househunting and wanted my input. The fact that I had horrendous morning sickness was something he simply ignored. When I had it confirmed by the doctor (home pregnancy tests are always false don't you know), he asked why I hadn't been satisfied with one child, like him. To be fair, though, he loved my DC very much indeed.

I was pregnant with my first (and consequent only) child and I live abroad. I went to the UK to see family when I was 5 months pregnant. I showed my own mum a scan photo all excited like, 'look you can see the head - his tiny nose...' etc.

She took a cursory glance and said in THE MOST BORED TONE EVER 'yes....amazimg machines thet have these days...'

She already had a grandson, you see.

DS is now 5yo and the grandson favouritism is still going strong.

Anyhoo.... Congratulations LondonMum79

Congratulations op,

When we announced to my mil we were pregnant- she went white as a sheet and demanded to know why we had been keeping things from her (we told her at 12 weeks after scan because I was terrified of miscarrying) then she started crying and told dh 'you're my baby, you cant have a baby' she also said 'what if you give it a name I don't like' I just turned to dh and said 'take me home now'. And ignored her for the rest of my pregnancy.

Did she know there was a chance of another baby? Maybe she was taken by surprise.
Whatever, don't let it spoil your news and I'm sure she'll be a loving Grandmother when baby arrives. In the meantime, don't bother to involve her in your plans as she'll only spoil things for you.

My mother in law didn't react very well to my bil and his wife's 3rd pregnancy. SIL got slightly hysterical and the rest of us sat looking at the floor, hoping it would all stop and trying not to laugh

It wasn't until later that MIL told me she reacted like that because she already looked after the first 2 3 times a week and she couldn't cope with another one. It's all alright 8 years later though!

When my dad told my grandmother they were expecting me she said: "That's what happens when you don't take precautions." I don't think he ever forgave her

What is the back story to this reaction?.. Does she babysit a lot or help financially a lot or anything that would mean she'll be negatively affected? Do you not get on? Are you and your partner in good relationship?

Otherwise she's just a misery, I guess! ?

Have a saintly mil here

My DM was very pleased when I said we were having DC2, but in the conversation we had when I told her she came out with "I didn't think you'd have another one" and "yes, I thought you were pregnant". I can only assume that holding two completely contradictory thoughts was her way of ensuring she was right whatever happened.

Some people can be truly vile. I remember my friend's FATHER, when she got pregnant by her partner who was an ex con. (She had 2 kids by her ex who she was married to for 10 years, and had been with new chap for 5 years.) Her dad said 'oh for fuck's sake! Is it gonna be a jailbird too, as well as a bastard?!' And then he stormed out.

She had a little girl, and her dad had very little to do with her. Then a year later she had another little girl (by the same chap,) and her father stopped talking to her. 3 years later, he still won't speak to her. (Having kids out of wedlock and with an ex con..... he is a robber not a murderer, and has never hurt anyone; not that I am justifying it!)

I also know someone who got pregnant at 31, with her HUSBAND of 3 years, and her mother just held her head in her hands and said 'oh no........' The biggest news of her life and that was the reaction.

My friend was devastated, and cried for weeks. That said, her mother loved the little girl to the moon and back when she came along, and wouldn't hear a word said against her. Her mother's friend said when she was young, it was very tough for her with 2 babies close in age and a man who was working away and she didn't want the same struggles for you.

Well done to you! Hope the woman is a bit better behaved when baby comes along!

Sorry the ex con was a robber, he isn't now! It was years ago! (Pre 2005!)

I'm dismayed by a lot of these responses, what a pity.
Congratulations OP!
Is it considered bad luck by some parents and PILs to show too much enthusiasm for the baby ahead of time, or are they always negative to the point of near indifference?

Congratulations OP. My PIL looked stunned and then said "well I hope you're not expecting us to babysit?" which has kind of summed up the relationship ever since...

My mother was like that about no.3, and went out of her way not to do anything helpful like looking after the other two when he was born. However, he's probably now her favourite grandchild.

Congrats OP.

DC1:
Dad, I'm pregnant
Oh fuck, how will you cope?

A month later:
Dad, it's twins.....Dad?..... Dad??

He has been an awesome GF though once he got used to it all!

When my DM was told she was all 'no one asked me if I wanted to be a grandma yet'! I was nearly 24 and had been married for 3 years!