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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think this is bloody lazy 'parenting'

192 replies

Exileinengland1999 · 13/02/2017 19:22

Really pissed off- DP has had the kids at home today for half term. I left for work at 8.15am and everyone was up. It's a beautiful day & sun is shining -DD 4 asked to go to the park as I left. I ring at 12 and they are still at home- kids have been watching tv and playing on a tablet. I ring again at 2pm and they are still at home having just had lunch. DP eventually takes them to the park for 1 hour after constant hassling.
I come home & house is a shit tip- nothing has been done either and I have spent my evening after a day's work hoovering and tidying after the mess DP has made.
Aibu to be pissed off on a number of counts- kids inside all day on screens, house a shit tip. DP has mostly spent the day not moving from one seat looking at his phone according to my DS.
Lazy bloody non- parenting? Aibu?

OP posts:

NarkyMcDinkyChops · 13/02/2017 19:24

Meh. He's the parent in charge for the day, his call what they do. First day of half term, nothing wrong with a lazy day.

PerspicaciaTick · 13/02/2017 19:24

Hoovering and tidying isn't exactly hands on parenting either is it?

Sirzy · 13/02/2017 19:24

As a regular thing not good. The odd lazy day is good though.

DianaMemorialJam · 13/02/2017 19:25

I have 'lazy parenting' days when I've been up a lot and tired or whatever else so sometimes housework suffers and dinner is out of the freezer etc. Is your dp at home with them every day? Could you have left the housework for him to do once kids were in bed?

ProudBadMum · 13/02/2017 19:25

No harm in it tbh.

MojitoMollie · 13/02/2017 19:26

so why are you hoovering and tidying up?

ComputerUserNumptyTwit · 13/02/2017 19:27

I would do this. I'd feel guilty about it, but I totally would bum around on my day off. Only difference is that I might spend a manic 30 minutes sticking the Hoover round and hiding the washing up before my partner came home and claim to have been "rushed off my feet". At least yours is an honest slob

Original poster

Exileinengland1999 · 13/02/2017 19:28

Tidying & hoovering because the house is grim and I want to relax after kids are in bed. Food on floor in lounge etc.

OP posts:

SEsofty · 13/02/2017 19:28

How did he make loads of mess, requiring hoovering, if he didn't move from a chair

BrianCoxWithBellsOn · 13/02/2017 19:29

If it was me and I had a day off and the kids were happy enough to mooch around the house, I'd let them. He did go to the park.

If he works, he's just having a chill day.

I'm judging him by my standards by the way. I'd totally have done the same. I'm single though (have OH but we don't live together) and wouldn't expect someone else to clean up the mess. I would have just left it for another day or got to it later in the evening if I felt like it.

I may be a slattern though.

EggsEleven · 13/02/2017 19:29

An hour at the park is long enough and I suppose it makes no difference if it was in the morning or at 2pm. Would've been nice for you not to have come home to a shit tip though.

tessiebear4 · 13/02/2017 19:30

I'm with you. Very lazy, especially on a beautiful day.

DixieNormas · 13/02/2017 19:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Shamoffour · 13/02/2017 19:30

No I would be pissed off.
Part of looking after the kids is staying on top of the mess.
A lazy day is fine as long as that's what the kids want to do.

Original poster

Exileinengland1999 · 13/02/2017 19:31

Made a mess by letting kids eat lunch in lounge and then didn't tidy up.
Maybe I am BU then but it does annoy me that he's fucked about on his phone pretty much all of the day

OP posts:

ComputerUserNumptyTwit · 13/02/2017 19:31

Definitely a slattern, Brian. Just like me. In fact I possess a selection of slatternity wear for exactly this kind of occasion

FormerlyFrikadela01 · 13/02/2017 19:31

Nothing wrong with a lazy day.

And what's with ringing twice? Do you not trust him to care for your DC?

Purplepicnic · 13/02/2017 19:32

I think it really depends whether he does this every time he has them.

Messy house would piss me right off though.

YouTheCat · 13/02/2017 19:33

YANBU. And why the hell isn't he now tidying up?

christinarossetti · 13/02/2017 19:33

Do you think that your phoning to ask him what he and the children are doing drives him into passive aggressive mode?

You say that he was 'constantly hassled' about going to the park - by you or the children? How did he sit on his phone all day whilst being 'constantly hassled' by a 4 year old? 10 mins would have me running for the coats.

Xmasbaby11 · 13/02/2017 19:38

Depends how often it happens really but I'd be annoyed about the mess.

Original poster

Exileinengland1999 · 13/02/2017 19:38

Hasstled by the kids- ignored them until after lunch. My DS told me - DD 4 asked at 8 this morning to go to bloody park- she was excited to not be in school. That's what's annoyed me the most.

OP posts:

donquixotedelamancha · 13/02/2017 19:40

Is DP a teacher? If so let the poor bugger have a day for his brain to melt.

Now hand him a job list for tomorrow :-)

Sittinginthesun · 13/02/2017 19:40

Similar story here, but I think they all deserve a day of Minecraft, Xbox and lying around.

cheminotte · 13/02/2017 19:41

Yes definitely lazy.

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