Is it rude to invite to hen party but not to wedding ceremony?

[iwannapuppy]

So I'm getting married on a tight budget (we have just had a DS) and we can only afford to invite family and 3 friends each to the day part of the wedding. Would it be seen as rude to invite friends to my hen party but then only invite them to the evening reception? I don't to offend anyone, but also think if I don't invite them to the hen party they still might be pissed with me. I get that at any wedding you are bound to upset someone, but I really don't know what the etiquette is.

[Xmasbaby11]

Yes it's rude. And I'd never go myself.

[Jaxhog]

Under the circumstances of having a tiny ceremony, not rude at all. You're still asking them to help you celebrate, just not the ceremony itself.

I'd only be pissed off if I was a good friend and not invited at all.

[Italwaysworksitselfout]

I didnt really know the bride but Dh was invited to the stag weekend of his db best friend who dh was also a life long friend. It cost us a fair bit. It was about 3 months before the wedding so the invites hadn't gone out. When they did everyone in dh's family were invited to the full wedding except us...not even an evening invite. I do think it's rude but if you make it clear that they will not be invited then they can make their own decision whether to go or not

[Alpanini]

I had a small wedding and invited 'evening' guests to my hen (byob picnic, meal out, then a very cheesy club). No one was forced to come, everyone did, got hammered and had a nice time. It's not a big deal (unless you are doing a pricey weekend away thing) it's just a good excuse to have a few drinks with your girlfriends. Very much doubt you'll be shunned by polite society for this one, though Debretts does say otherwise. For things that are meant to be fun weddings have got too many rules

[Meekonsandwich]

No, they would feel a LOT more miffed if they didn't get an invite to any of it.

Just explain.

[greenant]

OH MY GOD THIS IS SO RUDE!!! Etiquette is that All of your hens should be invited to your wedding. ie - Only have a small hen do with the few who are actually invited to the ceremony. Its just weird and a sure way that everyone will be talking about it amongst themselves and your friends getting upset

[MatildaTheCat]

Since this is a ZOMBIE THREAD I think we can safely assume the issue has been resolved by now.

Why, why do people resurrect these things?

[Sparklesocks]

greenant this thread is 2 years old so I think it’s probably sorted now...

[HardofCleaning]

Itwould be rude in normal circumstances but you're not having a traditional wedding so I'd be OK with this personally.

[PregnantSea]

I think traditionally yes, it is poor etiquette. However weddings have changed a lot since those rules were established. I didn't invite anyone from my hen do to my ceremony because it was strictly immediate family only at the reg office. I had no bridesmaids or maid of honour, it wasn't that kind of wedding. It only lasted about 15 minutes and then we did a quick ten minutes of milling about outside while people took photos, and then it was off to the reception to meet everyone else for the party. I don't think any of my friends minded being at the hen do but not at the reception. It's all about context, I think.

[Nichelette]

If you explained your situation to me I would completely understand. If they are your friends they will too.

[YeahNah1980]

Yes it’s rude.

[Dieu]

It is rude, sorry!