Would you try someone else's wedding dress on?

[WinterIsHereJon]

I'm getting married next year. Bought my dress a couple of months ago, and it's been living at my mums house away from where DP could see it. I was talking to my gran last night, who accidentally let slip that when she last came to visit both my mum and my sister tried my dress on for fun. I'm really upset and angry; it's supposed to be special but sort of feels less so now somehow. My mum and I have now fallen out as it was "just a bit of fun". I can't believe they would think it was ok! AIBU or overreacting?

Sorry, read the first few replies and haven't been online since 😳

So the consensus is that I'm not being completely unreasonable then! I should point out that it's not me who's fallen out with my DM, it's the other way around.

As for the comments made about my Gran being a shit stirrer, you couldn't be more wrong. She's very elderly and sometimes confused. I'd offered to show her my dress at when she visits at Christmas as I knew she'd love to see it. She kept saying she'd seen my in it already, and then remembered it wasn't me she'd seen. It was only when I then asked my mum that she got all defensive, shouty and tried to make out I was being ridiculous by spoiling their fun. Should have put that in the OP but it just seemed too long winded!

Can't believe the cheek of your mum

It was like when I caught my MIL in my dress, I was in the wrong for being shocked!

It's fine if you are happy for someone to try on your dress, but only if you say they can. Not sneakily behind your back.

I'm amazed that so many PPs think OP (and others) are just "precious" about weddings.

NO ONE has a right to use your property or possessions without asking you. Wedding dresses can be extremely expensive and they had no right to play dress up with it like a pair of five year olds. The posters who think she is unreasonable say "well, no harm done" but how do you know? Are OP, DSis and DM all the exact same size? Maybe DSis cakes herself in fake tan or foundation. Maybe one of them stood on the hem as they pulled it up. I would be fuming!

If they fancied trying out your car without our permission they could have been arrested. It's not just being precious

It sounds like your mum is very aware how spiteful it was and is projecting now. Just think if it's such a minor thing why didn't she mention it to you or even ask first? I suspect because she knows it's not on and didn't ever expect to get caught. She hid it because she knows it was wrong.

People always get more shitty if they get caught out and they know they are wrong. She is having a paddy because it was wrong and she got busted.

Nice how when people are in the wrong they start acting like it's you that's the arsehole. What cows! If you've been found out doing something wrong that's hurt someone, apologise. That's more dignified that continuing to assert that the person you have hurt is in the wrong which you clearly aren't, OP.

Get that dress out of there OP. You can't trust them with your precious things. (That they KNOW to be precious, that's the most hurtful thing)

Where is your mothers wedding dress? Get it out of the loft and start wearing it around Tescos.

Even better if it doesnt do up at the back/hang baubles from the lacy bits/tie a bit of lace round your head like Rambo/ridicule the fuck out of her dress and see if she still thinks it's all a bit of fun!

I'm with Gutted! I don't think your Mum will understand how inappropriate she has been unless someone wears something special to her without asking. It's not just the expense, it's the sentiment. Your Gran thinking it was you wearing it but it was your sister - that's upsetting actually.

WinterIsHereJon have you checked for damage/make up stains etc?

Yep I agree your mum is pissed off at getting busted. They are totally in the wrong. You entitled to feel cross. I actually think it's a bit weird - why would you WANT to try on your sisters wedding dress?
After my wedding I wouldn't have minded my whole family trying on my dress - before the service however and I would have very hacked off.

YADNBU.

My issue is with them not asking permission. That is rude.

That having been said, the last person to wear my wedding dress was my brother-who borrowed it for a Halloween costume. He looked luminous in it.

spoiling their fun