Pocket money for a 17 year old

[ScotsHumphreys]

DS is 17, he worked from the age of 13 up until recently when the newsagent finished him. He's not worked since but says he has been applying.

He's at college full time doing a-levels. Because of our income he doesn't get ANY financial help from college.

From us he gets £5 a week pocket money, a mobile phone contract (£30 a month) and a monthly bus card (£35 a month) as well as all his clothes etc bought for him.

Problem is, because he's only getting £5 a week in actual cash he never has any money and is constantly nattering for more. (Can I have £3 to get some lunch in town? Can I have £4 to get a coffee with Alice? Can I have £10 to take Gemma to the fireworks display?") it's constant.

DH says £5 a week is enough as we pay all the other stuff for him and it was his choice to go to college instead of getting a job. I say it's not fair because he doesn't get any financial help from anywhere else because of what WE earn.

He said his own kids never got loads of pocket money whilst at college so I pointed out that they got college bursaries and travel costs because their (single) mother is on benefits. Do they DO have access to money, unlike DS.

What is the solution here??? DS is pissed off because all his friends either gets college bursaries, benefits or generous allowances from parents. He gets neither.

I always had a Saturday job as a teenager - I got £30 a week, which back in 1996 was pretty good. In the last couple of months prior to my A-levels my mum gave me the child benefit she received for me, which was about £11 a week, so I didn't have to work.

The OP's son has had a job since he was 13, he's hardly a workshy special snowflake. In fact there aren't any special snowflakes at all on this thread. If people can afford to give their kids a generous allowance and choose to do so, then that's their choice.

Personally I encourage my kids to work, but I know many who don't, among them people whose kids who are now studying medicine and maths. I really doubt that not working in Tesco is going to hold them back.

I think what's best really depends on the kid.

If your child pushes themselves with their studies because they want to achieve , then I think it's a good thing and shows they have a work ethic. If you can afford to subsurface that, and allow them to have a bit of a social life, that's probably the best option.

For students who coast and dont have much of a work ethic, a job is probably going to be more beneficial for them in the long run.

OPs kid seems somewhere in between tbh. I'd suggest increasing his pocket money if his grades improve, and warning it will reduce again if they drop.

My son is 16. He's in year 11. We give him £100 a month. With this he pays for his phone and football subs and food when he's out. He saves £40 of it every month. He does help out a lot around the house, but not to earn his allowance. It is just expected for everyone to chip in.

We pay for everything else. He knows that if he is in education, we are happy to support him. He works really hard.

When he is no longer studying, he will be expected to get full time work, and then he will have to buy his own clothes and toiletries and nights out, car etc.

He is welcome to a room in my home and a meal at my table for as long as I'm living, as long as he's respectful.

My son is 15 yrs old. I transfer the child benefit into his bank and he pays for his clothes, gigs, presents etc. He is still at school and I pay for his uniform, bus fare and lunches plus other educational stuff. He is learning that he only has a finite amount of money and he needs to budget.

My older dc got their cb from being 14 and they pretty much funded themselves.
I'd buy expensive things like school uniform, shoes, coat etc, they had basic though and would have to add the extra if they wanted labels.
They too were doing odd jobs earning money at 14 and from 16/17 were working pt hours at various fast food places.
Both worked ft throughout college/uni.
If they are willing to work I think they should manage their own cb, if they don't get it due to your income then you can afford £80 a month.

Depends what you can afford, I think. I gave my DS an allowance of £100 a month when he was in college ('14-'16), plus paid for his travel to/from college, £30 phone contract and his clothes/toiletries. I think £5 a week would be pretty difficult to have any kind of social life to be honest.

My 17 yo son, also in 6th form gets £50 allowance, I pay his £17 mobile contract, his £89 monthly bus pass, all lunches and most of his clothes.

He's recently got a job in KFC working 14hrs a week which gives him £90 a month. He's just started going out more and I while I am happy to fund the odd day trip with mates (cinema, a bit extra for lunch) I have had to draw a line.

It's good for him to have a job.

Most kids at 6th form don't get any sort of help from the college, do they?

If you can afford to give him more, I think you're being really unreasonable giving him only a fiver. Where I lived, no one would employ me until I turned 18. It wasn't for want of trying. And that was way before the recession, there weren't any overqualified adults competing for the same work as me!

I think it's important to work during university, but college? No. That's basically an extension of school. Too young to have to balance exams and work unless necessity demands it. From what you say, you can afford to help him.

FV45, that must be £90/week not month or 4hours instead of 14? I earned >£2/hr in my first job, but that was a privately own dodgy business!

Ah yes fame.
He gets £4/hr.
First pay package was about £90 but he hadn't done a whole months work luckily it's him not me doing A level maths

I don't agree with this 'high grades are all' mentality. Working develops vital skills and teaches young people loads/ boosts confidence etc. OK if you work too much then it is negative but up to 8 hours a week in some ways can boost grades anyway, through the confidence and in some subjects what they learn may be useful. I used to teach Business Studies and Economics A Levels and the more worldly wise ones who worked were at an advantage.

Who on earth would want to take on a graduate who had never done a days work?

Wow that's not a lot at all. I'm impressed by your sons work ethic. I did not realise it was so little for a 17 year old.

Min wage for 17 yo is £3.87

I remember at the same age (29 years ago) getting £1.96/hr.

He's enjoying it, though he may have to cut down as exams approach.

I'm genuinely impressed. Good for him, I've obviously forgotten a bit about being a teenager.

I've just kicked him out of my bed with his Slipknot you tube shite!!!

oh my. I have all this in the future. My dc have dragged me out of bed because I promised to decorate the house for Christmas today!

I also have a 7 yo downstairs!

Thanks for all the replies, interesting to see how other families work.

I'm going to start giving him £100 a month directly to his bank. That is to cover his phone (£28) and travel (currently £36 a month but could be cheaper! This is an unlimited bus card which DS insists he needs however, he 'could' save money by getting one bus to college and walking a short distance instead of getting the two busses. Will be interesting to see what choice he makes now that he's got the budget!). That leaves him with £36 a month. Still not a lot but I'm a firm believer that he needs to get a job!!

Will also show him how quickly your money dwindles away when you have £30 phone contracts!

He can make packed lunches at home like the rest of the family do. I couldn't afford to eat my lunch at costa every day!

'What will that £36 a month cover though? Food and socialising? If so that not enough.'

He can walk more and decrease the cost of his bus pass. He can shop around for a cheaper mobile contract. He can make his own lunch to take in. He can take coffee in a flask. He can get a JOB.

Contracts are just that you can't walk away from them. And jobs are hard to come by.
Op make sure you read Martin Lewis guide to the minimum parents need to top up student loans by , before he starts uni.