To be annoyed when asked to help out at a party that my kids aren't invited...

[Freakindeakin]

So a friend is having a birthday party for her child and her child has chosen the friends they want to invite. This does not include my children which isn't a problem, even though they are close, my kids don't even know it's happening.

But now I've been asked to help out at the party last minute. I'm happy to help as we help each other out a lot, but it means changing our plans of going out for the day and my kids will probably find out about the party and they're too young to understand why they won't be able to go.

Aibu to be slightly annoyed and how can I tactfully let her know?? I don't want to hurt her feelings as she wouldn't do it intentionally but it will really hurt my child's feelings if they find out they weren't invited to the party.

I thought Kids were same age, same sex and friends etc. So it's not so bad that yours weren't invited

However I wouldn't be helping out if I was busy with my own children

Ah! So your friends DD is having an only girls party and one of your DC is a boy so obviously he wont be invited. You mention DC's in your OP - are they all boys? That would make a huge difference. Your OP that states your DC's are not invited to your friends DC party......Nothing at all about gender only party.

Even so I would still let your friend know you are not available to help out with her DC's party. You have made plans....The fact that your DC's are boys (?) makes no difference. They still have to be cared for....

Massive drip feed. FFS.

Odd thread

Im sure she probably expects your kids to come if shes asked for your help. Cant you just say that youll help if it means your kids can come along, but not otherwise

Your friendship with this woman does not automatically mean that your children will be friends too. It would be a bit weird for the other mother to tell her child that X has to come because she needs their mother's help.

If you can't arrange childcare or are too busy, that's fine - they are valid reasons to decline your help, and you should tell her.

If you are able to do it but don't want to out of jealousy, that makes me question your friendship altogether.

Careful. Might make you dizzy.

You must be bloody joking, of course YANBU.

Do not do it - under command of Mumsnet

Is it one of those pamper parties?

You OK Pag ??

Just about. It's exhausting though.

Massive drip feed there OP. Mentioning you have a son which is why HE isn't invited to an all girls party may have helped with perspective here!

I can't believe I missed a thread about the bride sending a save the date. I need to read this

OP, it''s a bit of a waste of time if you're not going to give very relevant info, until c180 messages have been posted...

Just say you or your husband is working suddenly too so you can't help.

You can't.

I would assume her kids have another parent? Mine have 2.

I don't know why you are asking. Enjoy your day out and tell her no

I would assume her kids have another parent? Mine have 2.

Not every child does though.

Nevertheless, the OP says the DH is unexpectedly working away

Completely taking the piss.
You aren't seriously considering messing your children about in order to help someone who has snubbed them?

I just cannot understand the bare-faced cheek of someone not inviting your kids to the party,then expecting you to help out at said party! I would say 'Sorry',I would love to help out but I can't get a babysitter for my kids'. Then she may realise what a selfish cow person she is being.

Tell her you will be looking after your kids which is understandable seeing as for whatever reasons they aren't invited. She needs to make friends with the parents who will actually be there

Ah just seen OP's post about it being a 'girls only' party and the DH not being able to help out at the last minute! Not such a big deal as I thought,but still rather cheeky though. Why doesn't she ask the mother of one of the kids actually going to the party? Would make more sense.