Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to make DD pay for driving lessons (that are from me)?

240 replies

woonnoow · 20/11/2016 20:22

Hi all,

My daughter is 17. She is just beginning to learn to drive. I'm giving her lessons - I have offered to get her 'proper' ones for Christmas, but she finds it better with me.

I take her everyday, so that's an hour of my time. I don't mind, but I work from home, so my time is obviously really important. AIBU to charge her £5 for an hour?

She seems to roll her eyes when I ask for it, saying that her friends' parents don't make them pay (that typical phrase! Grin) so AIBU?

OP posts:
honeylulu · 21/11/2016 19:12

Hello Mother, is that you?

missymayhemsmum · 21/11/2016 19:39

Totally unreasonable! Though if you are really pushed for time and she isn't you could trade driving lessons for an hour's housework?

ChickenVindaloo2 · 21/11/2016 19:56

I don't understand why people choose to have children then treat them like an inconvenience as soon as they hit their teenage years.

I see if often on here esp with charging some poor kid rent as soon as he gets his first paper round!

shouldwestayorshouldwego · 22/11/2016 06:53

I guess that the other possibility is that the dd has grown up somewhat entitled. Is used to getting everything her way and finally OP has had enough of always doing as asked/ told. I do see it among some of my dc's classmates (younger) that every need/ want is met or a tantrum ensues. I don't think charging is the way to go, but a more even distribution of the expectation that if the OP gives up 5 hours a week purely for her dd's benefit, that at nearly an adult she gives something back to the family. Probably being somewhat generous though.

llangennith · 22/11/2016 07:17

Well, I've heard it all nowConfused Unbelievable!! YABU and mean.

Meadows76 · 22/11/2016 10:09

I don't understand why people choose to have children then treat them like an inconvenience as soon as they hit their teenage years. I see if often on here esp with charging some poor kid rent as soon as he gets his first paper round!

100% THIS.

CatchingBabies · 22/11/2016 18:05

Op - I'm guessing you won't come back but after 5 pages of people telling you how awful this is please don't carry on defending it by saying you gave her a car or whatever reason you're going to try and justify it with.

Accept that you were wrong, sincerely apologise to your daughter and spend time with her freely because you want to and it's part o parenting her. I would hate you to ruin your relationship with her.

As someone who had a mother that saw her time as more important then me I can guess how she will be feeling. I stopped contact with her the minute I moved out.

maldini · 22/11/2016 22:05

I bet op's daughter (if she's still talking to her) will have a field day sending her mother invoices when she's elderly and needs her daughter's help.

Hayles88 · 22/11/2016 22:22

Yabvvvu. Never read anything quite like this. What a twat you are.

Neaders · 22/11/2016 22:50

Yabvu...
You mentioned earlier that you were going to give it back to her once she passed her test. If that is the case then yanbu.
As a late teen / early 20 my mum charged me 'rent'. I cried about having to hand it over but little did I know she was putting it in a savings account for me! Paid for solicitors fees on my first home, my sofa, wedding and bridesmaids dresses!

She's your dd ffs... not a customer!

RoseGoldHippie · 22/11/2016 22:55

Neaders that's a lovely story!

Neaders · 22/11/2016 23:01

I know Rose! She's a little legend... don't know what I would ever do without her!

RoseGoldHippie · 22/11/2016 23:10

Neaders I feel the same about my DM she's a mad one but I think that strain runs in my family! Hehehe

OP if your still reading this, please don't charge your DD unless your planning to save it up and give it back to her. You cannot charge her for your 'time'! She didn't ask to be born!

Ameliablue · 22/11/2016 23:13

Is anyone else touring up all the professional fees they could charge their children-
Chauffeur
Launderette
Chef
Housekeeper
Cake decorator
Coach
Tutor
Porter
Ironing service
PA
Nurse
Decorator
Cleaner
...

newbiz · 22/11/2016 23:19

This is a joke thread, it has to be, there's no way the OP can be serious

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.