To discharge myself from this horrible, torturous place?

[MaisieJ]

I am in hospital following an elective knee replacement. When I got back onto the ward the pain was pretty bad and I'd been told to buzz for painkillers so I did. auxiliary came in and said she'd let the nurse know. 30 minutes later no sign of nurse and pain is worse so I press buzzer again. Brash auxiliary came in and turned off the buzzer saying "I've already told her, constantly pressing your buzzer won't make her come any quicker!" 😲
At this point I also needed a wee but thanks to her attitude I didn't feel like I could ask her so thought I'd hold on for the nurse. 30 minutes later I'm busting to go so reluctantly pressed the buzzer. Same woman comes stomping back in 10 minutes later and snaps "is this about painkillers again?!" So I said no, I needed a bed pan. So off she strops, comes back in 10 minutes later and tries to drag me onto this horrible disgusting bedpan. Baring in mind I'd had no pain relief yet. I cried out and told her I couldn't do it so she said she'd go get help. 10 minutes later, no sign of her and I ended up pissing the bed. Mortified and I tears I tried to wipe myself best I could. Next minute she's back with another auxiliary, they fling my covers back rattling on about "getting on the bedpan" and realise my bed is soaked. The big horrible woman says loudly "you've already done it!!! Are you normally incontinent because if not, you shouldn't be incontinent in hospital either!" Basically making out that I'd done it on purpose.

Cut long story short they changed my sheets and I ended up drifting off to sleep. A while later I woke up, horrible taste in my mouth, I groggily reach for my glass of water and end up knocking it all over my bed. I called dh in tears saying my bed was wet and the auxiliaries were going to go ape at me. He insisted I press my buzzer and said he was making a complaint. I tried to clean it up myself but another patient saw and pressed her buzzer. Next minute I hear one of the auxiliaries say "she's gone and chucked water all over her bed now, well she can stay like that until I've finished with meals."

I eventually got clean sheets but I feel horrible. The auxiliaries have said stuff to the other women in the room like "when certain patients constantly demand attention it takes care away from those that genuinely need it". Now the other women in the room have started being funny with me too.
This morning I was woken up by a clattering trolley. Auxiliary said "what do you want for breakfast?". I said "I'll have a cup of coffee please" to which she rolled her eyes and snapped "im doing cereals! Not drinks! " I then heard her say to a student nurse "I swear I can't be doing with another day of her!"

What have I done???? I just want to go home whether I'm ready or not. DH is coming later so I'm considering asking him to just take me home with him. Bollocks to infection

OP, I feel desperately sorry for you.
I had orthopaedic surgery 6 months ago,and your story could have been mine: the nursing care on the ward was disgraceful ( I am a HCP and completely understand staff pressures of work, but these people were cruel and neglectful).
My GP told me after my discharge that 70 to 80% of his patients who had been in this hospital(North Wes )had cause for complaint.
I do hope you will follow PPs' good advice about making a complaint.
Hope you're feeling better soon.

(NorthWest)

Please whatever you do OP don'6 discharge yourself you need to stay there for a long as you are suppose to if an infection set in because you discharge yourself you will be in an even worse state and as for that shitty twatty fucking auxiliary get her name and report the bitch she needs her ass handing to her by someone if your that uncaring and that nasty then your in wrong job get your husband to speak to the matron when he comes in but the way she has treated you is appalling and she needs reporting to PALS OP I wish you a speedy recovery.

Please complain! It's so hard to sack/discipline people in the NHS. We have rubbish HCAs and nurses where I work and everybody knows their crap but we need people to complain so we have more evidence of their behaviour.

I had a very similar experience a couple of years ago re no pain relief and nasty comments about 'attention seeking' from the nurses. I wish id complained at the time but i was so unwell i just didn't feel up to it.
You have my sympathy op, hope you feel better soon.

Thinking about it at the same hospital I gave birth in a+e. That same maternity ward wouldn't admit me. I was 19 weeks

A+E were amazing. If not a bit traumatised

Both were Dryburn hospital Durham.

OP if you feel able, the next time you see the cow her, be assertive and say loudly "Following yesterday's treatment and the comments passed, I'm going to need your full name for my complaint that will be winging it's way to the CEO later today"

I know you're going to complain anyway and can get her name from other staff etc but, Ye Gads, she deserves to be told.

I hope today is better for you

Hope things are getting better for you OP

I'm currently contemplating hip replacement and this thread has scared the shit out of me. I've not been in hospital since my appendix burst in 1993, so I'm not sure what to expect really.

I've been in hospital for 5 operations/procedures in the last two months.
Every time I have been treated with kindness, understanding (even when things went wrong) and more than sufficient pain relief.
I echo what others have said. Email PALS, and often they have a direct number as well. Get them to come to the ward to see you.
You shouldn't be treated like this . Wishing you a very speedy recovery

OP your experience sounds dreadful ! Makes me worried that people who are less able to speak up for themselves (elderly patients ) may be getting treated like this too but will be too afraid to say anything . I hope you make a complaint it sounds horrible and not beneficial to your recovery at all

Both were Dryburn hospital Durham.

My sister had her baby there, she said the staff and the general care were horrific. Because of this I had my babies at the QE in Gateshead. I cannot fault the labour wards there at all. Except for them refusing to admit me for ages and ages. However once I was actually on the ward, the care and level of dedication among the staff was amazing.

That's bloody awful. I'd be kicking up one hell of stink. That was abuse.
Yes hospitals aren't hotels but They're also not borstals

Yep complain the nursing manager and the PALS dept too. I was in a major trauma unit a few years ago and the nursing staff were absolutely lovely all Philippine ladies couldn't have been better.

I came back to see them a couple of weeks later with a few big boxes of choccys for them they were very grateful saying I shouldn't have done bless 'em:-)

Terrible! I had similar after a c section with DD2...I'd not long come down from surgery onto the ward and was left for almost 2 hours before a doctor came to check me...I could have bled to death!

Then I asked an auxilary for some water and she said "The taps over there!" pointing to the end of a long ward!

I'm afraid I snapped and said "I've just had a c section! THIS MORNING! So please get me some water!"

Stupid bitch. I should have complained about her! I hope your awful one gets sacked!

I have just read your post to DH who is a nurse. Once he picked his jaw up off the floor at your treatment, he's just made a brilliant suggestion. If your phone has a voice recorder, record her. Its evidence . And speak to nurse in charge, or her senior. And patient liason. Appalling.

My husband is a hca, he will often come home from a 12 hour shift saying how some patients are particularly troublesome or wet the bed several times or were hard work. However, he still changes their beds as often as required, he still helps immediately with bed pans and whatever else is required he will just do what most people do and have a moan abour work when he gets home! Your experience sounds awful and you absolutely must complain to pals

Fucking atrocious
I am so sorry you're going through this whilst you're so vulnerable post op.
Please don't discharge yourself though! Contact PALS first thing in the morning, tell them it's urgent as you are still an inpatient.
Also, speak to your consultant - he will go apeshit at the infection risk from urine soaked dressings if nothing else.
And shame on the posters implying this should be acceptable.
The auxiliary nurse acted like an out and out cunt. You'll often see me defending behaviour in the NHS due to staffing/morale etc but this is awful.

It's appalling and is exactly what I've experienced in every hospital I've been in

I have to say my experiences have been similar. I have never received medication in the correct intervals at hospital. On my last visit this led to my not receiving the medicine to stop me throwing up, with the predictable result that I threw up, creating more work for the overstretched staff. I've also been treated as an annoyance for needing the toilet etc.

That said I have also had good and kind staff as well (and they are the majority), but the combination of general understaffing and a few bad apples doors make hospital a hellish place to be.

I left the hospital as soon as I could, so I couldn't blame the op for doing the same.

Was it Llandough Hospital Cardiff by any chance?

You should not have to discharge yourself OP. This is the hospitals problem. If they employ people like this and allow that kind of behavior they will have to sort the fallout. You have every right to request that you no longer have any contact with the staff concerned, and alternative care must be sorted. Absolutely hateful behaviour from those bitches. I would be tempted to chuck the bedpan over their heads if you do manage to use it. They deserve far worse. When you are better, do not let this go. They need to be sacked.

Big hugs to you OP. I am so sorry you have encountered these bitter failures at a time when you need support. I wish you a speedy recovery.

Have been thinking about you OP, being in hospital is miserable at night even without being treated badly.

Hope things get better tomorrow.

Just finished reading this. What dreadful care, without any dignity or respect for you as a person. I hope things have gotten better and you have made a complaint. It can only get better if someone lets them know it's an issue. They were in the wrong!

DH received appalling care at North Middlesex. He discharged himself after a major accident way too early because the level of care was so shocking. They also "lost" the painkillers he was meant to go home with. Another batch was eventually produced but clearly one of the staff took the first round and no one seemed too fussed that a large amount of opioids had gone poof! Horrid place.

It's atrocious. And it's happened to me too. The day after a c section under general anaesthetic because I had HELLP syndrome, I was denied painkillers ( they were later found on the window sill behind me way out of reach). I was pretty much immobilised due to various drips and catheters, yet I was denied a table so I could reach a drink, as I was breastfeeding this caused my baby not to get enough milk and ai had to give him a bottle. When my catheter failed I was hauled out of bed, stripped naked and left sitting there while they changed the bed, they wouldn't give me my dressing gown to cover up. Some of the nurses ( one in particular ) seemed to get a kick out of making patients miserable. And this was in the High Dependency ward. Other nurses were amazing, but there were a few sadists. I should have complained but I was too ill and frightened. I ended up with really bad PND, and how I was treated certainly didn't help.