AIBU to ask for this sum of money from DS and his partner?

[MightyJoeAverage]

I'll try to keep this short.

I've agreed that DS and his partner and my DGS can come and live in my house for a while; they're trying to save for a deposit and mortgage and we live in a pricey part of the UK, so it's not easy. They stayed for a month earlier this year and it worked well really given I'm used to living alone and they needed to find a way to establish the routine which works for my DGS who is not two yet. I didn't charge them anything that time, but I've told DS that this time I can't let them stay for free because of the impact on my utility bills etc.

They both work F/T, the other DGP's do a lot of childcare to enable my Dil to go work without sky high childcare costs. I work F/T too and live alone. How much would it be reasonable to ask for as a contribution for their stay in my home? I have a figure in mind but no idea if it's reasonable or not and before I speak to DS I'd like some help please. They would have a double bedroom and DGS will have his own room, all use of everything they need but would be buying and cooking their own food. I still pay a mortgage which is almost £600 pm.

The figure I have thought of is cheaper than rental where we are, so I'd thought of £500 pm for them all. I know that if they stay for longer than 6 weeks I have to notify the LA that I'm no longer eligible for single person discount on my council tax so I'm sort of taking this into account as well as the increased bills due to more use of water, electric, gas and so forth.

I'll shut up now, having failed to keep it short, but I'm happy to answer questions.

TIA.

OP - having read the thread I think £500 pcm is reasonable and so is laying down some ground rules for the duration of their stay. If at the end of their stay you choose to gift some of the money back to them, I think that would be a generous gesture but equally you may want to treat yourself to a holiday to recover!

It is hard work having people living in your home when you are used to enjoying the solitude. Your grandchild I'm sure is wonderful to be around but children are noisy and disruptive. You are very much doing your son & DIL a favour to help them save and they need to act appropriately, foregoing luxuries to reach their savings goal.

I think the questions you are planning to ask are realistic, the aim of the conversation is to find out what their saving goal is, what is the difference at the moment, how much are they saving per month. The answers may reveal just how serious they are. Good luck OP.

Hi Op,

I think it's so kind of you to offer to help out your ds in this way.

You could ask them what they think is reasonable? Engage them with your costs. Ask them how long they need to save up. Establish dates. That way all expectations are managed and hopefully nobody gets cheesed off.

So what did you decide?