...to ask how much you spend on birthday gifts for your DC's friends?

[wheresmyfairygodmother]

Talking about their general classmates.

I used to spend roughly the equivalent of what they'd spent on inviting my child to the party, eg. for a soft play party I'd spend around £10.

Then my DC had a soft party and I couldn't believe the cheap tat some parents gifted! Have been unsure of etiquette ever since. I am constantly working to a budget so don't want to overspend, but I'm also curious what's the norm

I'm annoyed if DD doesn't get a card. I'd rather have a card than present, though both are nice.

I spend around £10-12 on a present a few more quid if a particularly good friend.

About £10 here. Might be £8 or £12 as I'll buy something that I think they will like around that budget, but probably averages out at £10 overall.

£15-20 for close friends where I'm friends with the parents too.

Although was shocked present shopping yesterday when DS said he wanted to buy his friend a £15 Lego set with his own money - ended up giving him my £10 budget and he paid the remaining £5 (i'd have bought it anyway but I didn't want to discourage him from at least contributing as he's never wanted to pay for a present himself before).

Errr its not compulsary to buy a gift if you are invited to a party!

Sounds like you had a party for the gifts. My cousin had a adult get to gether with a few butties (no games, no ice cream and jelly, no party bag etc) and then called it her daughters 2nd birthday.

She asked me a few weeks later when i saw her why i didnt get her daughter a present. She got such a mouthful and i embarassed her infront of everyone!

No more than £10 (if you can afford that of course). Lately my son's friends have started clubbing together. At last party one child got the Lego Millenium Falcon - 11 X £10. Seemed like a good idea.

I spend roughly about £10 but if something is reduced on sale I will buy that. If it's one of their good friends I may push to £20 depending on what i find or know they like something in particular.

Just to go with the 'cheap tat' theme, when I once asked my then 6 year old what he wanted for Christmas and his 'biggest wish' was a packet of blue tack.

I used to put £10-15 in a card but last year we did a birthday party for ds and everyone put £20-30 in the card so now I put £20 min ad £30 if it's a close friend!

Crikey ....can't get over the £40 one! I don't give my own kids that much!
I always spent about £5 when my kids went to parties, so that would probably translate to £10 now.

A fiver in a card normally. This is what most of the other parents seem to do to.

My present cupboard is full of things I have spent about a fiver on but that I have got cheap in sales etc so they look more expensive. But at my dc's days I have noticed a range from stuff clearly from the pound shop to stuff that must be about £15 - I think everyone should just buy what they afford/think they should spend and not worry about it - e.g. I know many people have less money than us. Plus I have 3dcs so three times as many parties to buy for than people with one child. Also my kids have never noticed how much people spend (but they are all under 7) and there is no link between how expensive the book is and how much they like the gift.

For just normal everyday friends I spend £8 or so. For close friends I spend £10-£15.

Was embarrassed today because spent £8 on birthday present, Dd won pass the parcel and It was the same bloody toy 😵😵😳

I usually spend about £8, but to be honest my DD had her first party this year and most of the children brought a card with £5 inside, think she got about £50 and she was well happy that she could go to the toy shop and buy MORE shopkins, I think £5 is enough to put in a card for a child's party it can get silly otherwise

For my younger child, I spend around six or seven pounds on his friends who are 6. Older child (11), usually put a tenner in a card, as they like to safe up and choose their own gifts. A ten pound voucher or book token is also good. But it all mounts up so I think between five and ten pounds is fine. It is not a competition so really I think what you can afford is best as you also have to pay for a card, wrapping etc.

£10 (although usually I go the Entertainer and by stuff on offer).

when they were first at school I used to have a present box, I would buy sets of books from the book people which work out very cheap for nice books. I would also stock up in sales with fairly generic things. then I would put together a present which probably cost me about £5 but was made up of stuff worth about £10. now they are a bit older and have fewer friends who we know better I would try to buy stuff to suit that child and their likes but I still stock up on bargains in advance although on the whole i would now spend £10-15.

Iirc, I spent closer to the equivalent of £10.

Then one friend had a party and the parents suggested a Beanie Baby toy be brought that would be donated to a local foster house for hard-to-place children. That kind of idea became the norm for that particular class. Another DD had a friend whose parents suggested a donation to the school library, and provided a list from the librarian. You could buy a book or give cash. I really liked both ideas.

When they DCs got older most people started giving gift cards with a value of £15-20, but my DCs funded their own gift giving at that stage. Sometimes groups of friends pooled resources and got something special for the birthday person.

When DD was younger, I bought a load of bargains mainly when they were reduced for a short period on Amazon as she went to lots of large whole class parties. So I could get stuff worth £7-10 for £3.50-5 and add another small item. Now I give £10 or spend around about that amount, up to about £12. For one friend, about £15.

I spend same as most people 5-10 usually at Argos or TK Maxx. Occasionally I have spent more. Sometimes my daughter has received really generous gifts - maybe up to £25-£30 spent but I just figure they have more disposable income than me so I don't feel bad or pressurised to do the same. Equally she has received Poundland toys or even nothing from some friends attending her party but it wasn't an issue. As long as she has a great party and has some stuff to open afterwards I am not bothered by the value or the quality really. And she definitely wouldn't have noticed.

I spend around £7-£10 but the secondary school age ones I just put a £10 in the card. My 7 year old had a soft play type party last year. One child gave him a £2 book. But maybe the family are hard up. But most of his gifts were around £5-£8

Haudyer oh no!

I went through a phase of doing Where's Wally books after DD was given one and loved it. Then Book People brought out an '8 for 10 quid' deal and I stopped that sharpish! Shame really as a £1 one from Book People is just as much fun to receive as an identical £6 one.

Do people really spend more on "posh" parties than simple "at home" affairs?? How harsh. So the kids with parents who can afford expensive parties will get the better presents? That doesn't seem very fair.

If a parent decides to spend more on their kid's birthday then that is their choice, and their treat for their child. They shouldn't then expect the guests to subsidise it.

I do agree with you OP regarding the cheap tat though. DS got a few pound shop gifts last year and they all fell apart within hours. If someone doesn't have money to spend on a gift I'd rather they just got a card or some Balloons or whatever a 2-year-old will be delighted by. I hate all that useless plastic stuff.
That said, I wouldn't hold it against the parent either, maybe they didn't have time to choose etc.; just wouldn't like it very much.

My kids couldn't give a monkeys what the present cost, but would be very disappointed if they received something that looked great but which broke within 5 mins so quality is important. I spend £8-10 (up to £15 for a very good friend) but bulk buy in advance in the sales so I can get reasonable quality gifts for less.

I think this is a really good post because it can be tricky knowing. I usually spend between £5 and £10 and always try and stock up in the sales. My mum never had much money and certainly when l was older was always embarrassed at taking cheap crap gifts.