AIBU to be angry at teacher who refuses DS water on long coach journey???

[Gizzle]

DS came home very subdued and downcast after the annual school day trip to the seaside today. Turns out that he left his bag on the beach (not unusual, he's an 8yo boy after all) but luckily it was retrieved by a teacher. However, when he asked politely for the bag, she refused to give it to him for the entire duration of the return coach journey, even though it contained his water bottle and he was clearly very thirsty after a day on the beach. I'm not sure what kind of lesson she was hoping to teach him, but I would have thought that children of this age should be helped towards independence, and not punished into it. And refusing a thirsty child water? Is there ever a case for that?

How long was the long coach journey?

About 2 hours I think

Yes how long was the coach journey?

Children have a right to access drinking water during the school day.

Was she trying to teach him a lesson by withholding his bag? It must be very annoying for the staff if he constantly leaves things and they have to mop up after him. Of course he needs to take responsibility for his stuff but maybe there's a better way to encourage that.

Alternatively the teacher was busy/travel sick and his water flask just happened to be bottom of the list.

So he's spent all day at the beach in the heat and hen was denied his bag for a drink on a two hour coach journey?

YADNBU I would have to find out exactly what went on and then if it were the truth she would cop it !

"Even though it contained his water bottle and he was clearly thirsty"

Did he say to her he was thirsty and ask her for his drink?

If he simply asked for his bag and she refused then YABU.

Depends. If he only asked for his drink once he had been sitting on the coach for half an hour then I would say he wasn't that desperate for a drink.
Was it safe for the teacher to move along the coach to hand him his bag? If the coach was moving that may not have been safe.

Most of the coach companies we use at school do not allow food or drink on trips. This could be part of it.

If he didn't specifically say his water was in it and he was thirsty, she may be not to blame. However, if he did and she still refused to give it to him, that's pretty poor.

Also, eating and drinking are prohibited in coaches? Since when? Genuine question!

I think you should be thanking his teacher for retrieving his bag. If they hadn't then he'd have had no drink AND he'd have lost his bag.

I would save my anger until after I had spoken to the Teacher and let them explain.

What would he have done if the teacher hadn't noticed and it had been left on the beach?

Food & drink does not usually include water. Sticky drinks that could make a mess yes. 2 hours on a stuffy coach without access to water is unacceptable. I would complain.

He definitely is forgetful and frequently loses things - believe me, I get the fact that's annoying - but I can't see how withholding his water is helpful in any way. She is not his teacher, by the way; she teaches the opposite class in his year. When he tried to pass her to get to the loo for water (yuk), she told the teacher next to him that he was the most forgetful boy in Y3. He's actually a really bright, hardworking, well behaved child. Why try and humiliate him like that? I thought teaching had improved since I was a child.

She was sitting behind him; and yes, he made it clear that he wanted his water bottle from within the bag. Witchend, I am grateful she retrieved the bag, but I don't understand what she felt either she or he might gain from withholding water on the coach journey.

Were they even allowed to drink on the bus?

Didn't he ask a friend?

You'll have to ask the teacher her reasoning though.

No it's definitely not okay but can you imagine how frazzled she would have been at the end of a long day, parenting 30 kids? She's not perfect and obviously should have given him the bottle but TBH I am knackered after a day at the beach with one child, let along a whole class. People drop the ball so perhaps a quiet word in her ear is enough. If it's not then definitely escalate.

she told the teacher next to him that he was the most forgetful boy in Y3 or... that day, at that moment, he really was the most forgetful boy in Y3.

But you do need to find out if drink and fod were prohibited, whether they were told this and reminded as they got back on board and your DS missed out because he forgot his bag.

Then again, at 7 or 8 he will still be learning not to lose stuff, so maybe you need to make that point to your DS...

... and then ask the teacher. You never know, she may have an entirely different version of events.

So, you are going to go into school tomorrow to upbraid a teacher because she didn't allow your son access to his water bottle, which would have been left on the beach along with his bag if it hadn't been for her. A thank you for retrieving his possessions would be more appropriate.

Yes I would say thank you for retrieving his bag and maybe look at strategies to help him become not the most forgetful boy in the year.
He can't have been that dreadfully thirsty if he left his bag and got on the coach without it!

Were other children allowed to drink on the coach? If so, yanbu.

Some teachers just like a power trip I'm afraid. Why on earth she would hold back the bag I don't know. It just teaches him that some adults are spiteful. I am a teacher by the way and am dreading my son learning this.

It's a bizarre place on here sometimes.

I don't care how frazzled the teacher was - on what planet is not giving a child a drink of water in any way acceptable? I'm pretty sure nurses and carers are frazzled but I don't think any of us would thank them if we or our loved ones were left thirsty!