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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think sort out your own childcare!

211 replies

FrankWelker · 01/06/2016 06:37

Half- term and I am using annual leave to look after DC. So far this week I have had 5 phone calls from 2 different parents who ( unfortunately) know I'm off to see if I can have their kids from 7.30-6.40 pm. I'm perfectly happy to help out in an emergency but both parents have said they forgot it was half term. The same ones who forgot the Easter holidays were for 3 weeks. As I said I will always try and help if someone is in a tight spot but am I being unreasonable with this? I don't particularly want to wake up for 7.30 am on my time off and when I do would rather do play dates with kids who my children want to see- and these kids aren't even my kids ages that
they can play easily. We get the school term dates well in advance! Does anyone else get this (and get hacked off like me!)

OP posts:
StephanieKing · 01/06/2016 06:39

YANBU - I would never have the balls to ask someone to do that for me. Shock

Shannaratiger · 01/06/2016 06:41

YANBU tell them no you've got plans organised for everyday.

FrancisdeSales · 01/06/2016 06:42

Absolutely tell them no! Worry liberty! Some people sincerely take the piss. YADDDNBU

Twowrongsdontmakearight · 01/06/2016 06:42

I got hacked off when I was a SAHM and one 'friend' in particular tried to use some of us as free childcare. She didn't get that we and our families had taken a huge cut in finances to be there for our DC, not as wrap around care for hers!

So YANBU. You're using up your hols to look after your DC. They are free to do the same.

FrancisdeSales · 01/06/2016 06:43

Worra liberty!!! Not worry!

WinniePooh101 · 01/06/2016 06:45

If it was a one off then I would help but if its the same parents every school holiday then no I wouldn't. They are notified of the school holidays just like you are.

Original poster
FrankWelker · 01/06/2016 06:49

This morning - woken up by the phone at 6:15am again regarding this by the same mum and I've lost it with her. Told her to sort out a camp/ holiday club instead ( but they cost money!- no shit Susan. This comment made me go nuts) but DO NOT phone me again. Unless she has skin like rhino hide I suspect she has got the message!

OP posts:
SKYTVADDICT · 01/06/2016 06:54

Wow! Just wow! 6.15! How dare she? Bloody well done for standing your ground! I am a childminder but giving up at end of June and going to work out of the house. I already have sorted my 2 a schedule for the summer holidays. Some with family, some a childminder and some sports camps etc. Would never dream of asking friends!!

flanjabelle · 01/06/2016 06:57

Wow! I'm not surprised you lost your shit pp, she has got some bloody cheek. You are not a childminder!!!

penisbeakerlaminateflooringetc · 01/06/2016 06:57

It's happened that I've forgotten all about days off too. Not half term holidays but inset days. I've only realised once it been too late to book holiday club and have asked other parents to help out. But Ive always offered to pay them what I would have paid the holiday club.

flanjabelle · 01/06/2016 06:57

Op*

Lunar1 · 01/06/2016 06:58

Bloody hell, 6.15!!!!

Lunar1 · 01/06/2016 06:59

Bloody hell, 6.15!!!!

Lunar1 · 01/06/2016 06:59

Bloody hell, 6.15!!!!

HoggleHoggle · 01/06/2016 06:59

That's an insanely rude thing to do!

Lunar1 · 01/06/2016 07:00

Bloody hell, 6.15!!!!

Lunar1 · 01/06/2016 07:00

Oops Confused

LindyHemming · 01/06/2016 07:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Chottie · 01/06/2016 07:00

Goodness - speechless with shock at her nerve!

beenaroundawhile · 01/06/2016 07:02

Unbelievable.

Sounds like you've been too generous in the past and not asked for reciprocal help. I am a SAHM and haven't been asked this yet as I have other responsibilities so people know not to assume I'm actually at home most of the time, but if someone did ask for anything that wasn't an emergency I would make clear that I expected the same in return, weekend, after school.

Quite frankly it also depends on the child coming, if they're easy going, well behaved and eat well then I'm much more likely to say yes. It's nice for the kids to have company at home.

insancerre · 01/06/2016 07:04

Yanbu
A colleague of mine had to hastily rearrange her shifts as she hadn't realised her daughter had finished school
It meant we all had to pick up the slack
She has booked a holiday that goes into the week after her child should return to school, meaning her daughter misses a week of school
She hasn't asked for permission as she thought her daughters holidays were the same as her husbands. Her husbands a head teacher. That's going to look good in the local press when he gets fined for a term time holiday

I can't believe she phoned you at 6.15 am, op. That's just rude

TendonQueen · 01/06/2016 07:04

That is unbelievable piss taking. Good for you for saying no.

Original poster
FrankWelker · 01/06/2016 07:05

Lunar1 I know 6:15! Hence the irate post on mumsnet at this ungodly hour on my day off!

OP posts:
Maursh · 01/06/2016 07:05

Calling at 6.15am is insanely rude.

I think that next time someone asks you to have their children from 7.30am laugh and say "sorry, but I won't be up by then on my DAY OFF"

captainproton · 01/06/2016 07:07

I'm a SAHM and now the primary school allocation has been done Ive already had a mum whose child will go to the same school as my dc mention about helping each other out with lifts/holidays etc. She's suddenly becoMe very friendly and I feel I'm being groomed.

I have 3 kids the eldest will start school in September I don't want to feel obliged to help out when I doubt she'll ever be able to help me out. My life is not exactly peaceful right now.