re widowed MIL and wedding ring?

[lulucappuccino]

FIL died (relatively young) three weeks ago, after a long illness. MIL isn't a particularly warm person, but they had a long, good marriage.

I noticed that that she's not wearing her wedding ring (not a one-off, it's been several occasions).

She's definitely not on the lookout for another man.

I haven't mentioned this to DH.

I think it's odd. It's absolutely up to her though, of course. Her marriage. Her grief. Her finger!

Just seems a bit odd. I'm being unreasonable to think that though, aren't I?

Absolutely none of your business. You sound quite nasty in fact.

Absolutely none of your business. Perhaps she feels odd wearing a ring and not having her husband with her anymore. You sound very cold.

She's probably removed it to have a better chance of attracting men when out clubbing.

is that what you hoped we would all say?

I doubt the op is even an adult. More likely a teenage boy.

MIL is not very warm....MIL is odd....

OP, have a look at yourself and you might find that the same things could be said about you.

Your MIL has just been widowed. Long illness or not, life is going to feel very different and very scary to her right now. Thank God she does have the support of others - if she was reliant on just you I would worry for her.

Oh, and as for her wedding ring, it is entirely up to her what she does with it and quite simply is none of your business. Hth

YABU. Just that.

Oh god, I wouldn't want to be her only support. She's surrounded by people, but DH and I have done the lion's share over the past years, mainly because we live very close by so it's easier for us than his siblings.

It's almost 15 years since my MIL passed away. My lovely FIL has never really come to terms with it. He's done some very odd things over the years.

He kept her handbag as it was, with everything in it. He kept all her clothes. He moved house last year, moved to another country, and took all her clothes with him. He packed them up from the old house, took them with him and put them all in his new wardrobes.

I wish he was able to move on but I don't feel its my place to say anything to him. I wouldn't know how to without upsetting him anyway. He's dealing with it his own way I guess.

There were judge bitches around when I lost my first husband. Some people are just crappy humans.

How rude.My husband died when I was 26.
I took off my wedding ring. Who are you to judge OP?

I don't wear my wedding ring any more and neither does DH. I don't even know where the rings are! DH stopped wearing his about 3 years after we were married; I lasted about 30 years longer! We've been married for 38 years.

I think YABU OP. It's up to your MIL whether she wears her ring or not.

I am quite sure that your MIL wouldn't want you to be her only support either OP

gosh lots of mn getting their knickers in a twist over this.

could it be round her neck, on a necklace?

What an unpleasant OP.
Yes, YABU. You are obviously That Sort of DIL.

did she lose weight/put on weight perhaps?

Oh god, I wouldn't want to be her only support.

I'm sure she would feel the same, whoever you are

This idea of me being her only support is bizarre. Nobody would want to be the only support for a terminally ill person and their spouse. Why would this ever be a DIL anyway? Not their DD, but their DS' wife? I think there's a bit of confusion going on here...

There were judge bitches around when I lost my first husband. Some people are just crappy humans.

They sure are. I guess mn is just a reflection of this. Most are fine, some are just crappy. With zero emotional intelligence.

No, her weight hasn't noticeably altered.

Or perhaps after her long, good marriage ended with her husband's long illness, she's working on what to do next with the rest of her life.
It's not the OP's business, and the comment about 'not being a particularly warm person' is essence of pure bitchiness.
When my dad dies, I'll support my mother in any way I can and not be cat's bumface with anything she chooses to do to get through it and survive.

Am I the only person who thinks that this is NOT an odd thing to ask?
OP has noticed that her MIL is no longer wearing a symbol of her bond to her recently deceased husband, and has used an anonymous, online forum in which to find an answer. She's already stated that she hasn't mentioned this to her DH, yet posters pile in to tell her how shockingly insensitive she would be to talk to him about it.
If everyone stopped falling over themselves to win the "most reasonable, sensitive poster" prize, OP might be able to hear the few who've told her that grief affects people in different ways, and one day in the future MIL might explain the reason of her own accord.
If we all minded our own business there wouldn't be a MN.

I've been married 40 years, haven't worn my ring for c10 years because it's too big.
MIL had her ring buried with FIL.
It's her choice.
MYOB op.