So I was named as a correspondent in a divorce petition

[BuildingBlocks9]

DP divorced W in Jan 2015 (separated in April 2013, divorce petition issued in Feb 2014 on the grounds on her unreasonable behaviour and granted in Jan 2015). In April 2015 I gave birth to our DD. I am pregnant now with our second DC due in July. My DP has a DSD who is 4 and she spends every alternate weekend with us. Last weekend she asked me whether I was having baby as my tummy is big - I told her that it was supposed to be a surprise for her and she will have a baby brother in summer. My DP also send e-mail to his ExW Fyi that DSD will have a baby brother. Yesterday in a post I received petition in a post dated and stamped by the court in April 2014 naming me as a correspondent in proceeding of DP divorce on the grounds of adultery with an original letter issued to ExW thatshe needs to amend petition as details of marriage certificate do not match. There was also a letter from ExW that she knew about me, she showed dignity by not pushing thru her petition and she let DP divorce her on unreasonable behaviour grounds as wanted to have it done and dusted. Adding that I as a woman and mother myself should show respect and dignity to DSD and have decency to tell her about pregnancy.
I assume that she originally wanted to name me in divorce proceedings and divorce DO on grounds of adultery but filled in petition incorrectly and did not resend it as DP has already issued his petition. But why is she sending this to me now - it is 3 years on since they separated. We are going to have our second baby and she is doing this out of spite. Shall I report her for nuisance?

"Omg I am getting paranoid"

Yes, and to a very unreasonable extent.

Is it not so shiny with him after all?

I think the OP used 'we' to mean her and her DP.

You want to report her for nuisance because she criticised you for not telling your dsd that you were pregnant?

Your dh should have told his daughter about your pregnancy at soon as practicable, this "it was meant to be a surprise for you" is just ridiculous.

Act like an adult, OP, it stops no end of silly pettiness.

Well were you around back then? Sounds like you behaved pretty badly yet you're bothered about a letter?

Let it go.

I would be pretty pissed if my husband had an affair, left me then divorced me on unreasonable behaviour. I think she's been quite fair and restrained if those are the circumstances.

What does it matter? They're divorced, he's moved on, it has no bearing whatsoever on your present or future.

Be kind to her and about her, not just to be the bigger person and because she's the mother of his daughter but also because you did her wrong.

Thank you all - I do actually agree with Lurkedforever1. It might be her point

why is she issuing divorce proceedings if they are already divorced?

Maybe not have affairs with married men if you don't want to deal with the ex wife? Not difficult....and sex with someone when they are married to someone else is adultery, regardless of separation. Do you kid yourself you didn't have an affair on this basis?

The ex has made it very clear she knows everything and that she's got your number. She also sounds like a grown up, with considerable dignity.

"By we being pregnant I meant myself and DP"

My apologies, I did not realise your DP is also a woman and that you had overlapping pregnancies.

She's probably just having a dig and who can blame her really?

You can't report her to anyone. All she's done is written you a letter.

No Bonney - basically she wanted to issue cross petition on a basis of DPs adultery. She filled in petition incorrectly and it was send back to her with letter to amend it and send back with a fee. She put a note that at the end she has not done so as it would only drag things out as she knew DP will not consent and she wanted to end marriage asap

All sounds unnecessarily dramatic.

She finds out I am pregnant with our second DC and send this couple of days afterwards - bitter much

I think she's doing it out of hurt, not spite. She's saying she acted magnanimously towards you in the past, the least you could have done was let her know about the pregnancy, not least so that she could deal with any repercussions for her daughter. You have no reason to believe she's going to do anything else, and you certainly have no grounds for reporting anything.

So they had a one year old dd when they divorced?

And you were pregnant before the divorce went through 3 years ago and are now on your second?

Doesn't waste time your chap does he?

Pah, sounds like she has grounds to be bitter.

You say you were going to surprise dsd, do you mean you were going to turn up with a baby?

Don't you think she's entitled to be bitter? You seem to have been the cause of her marriage breaking up, you got pregnant within three months of the separation, and neither you nor your DP are treating her with much consideration. And you do seem unduly fixated on her now.

Am I being dim here? I think I need clarification, please?
Were you having an affair with your DP when he was actually still with his ex-wife?
When did you get together, and when did they split up?
If you 'overlapped', then yes, I see her point. If not, then she's being a bit difficult.

I'd be really happy if I was her, to know it was bothering you so much.

You sound like you have no empathy whatsoever. Do one.

bitter much

Yeah, sounds like you stole her husband, mate.