To be in awe of single parents

[agapimou]

Dh is working away for 2 weeks. Mil usually takes 14 month old dd in the evenings but has been sick for 5 days.

We have been living on spaghetti and cheese sandwiches for the last 3 days. The house is an absolute tip, we have no clean clothes, the dogs need a walk, the hamster needs cleaning out, I havn't showered for 6 days and last night I cried when dd woke up at 3 am again. I also work from home and am about to lose several clients as dd only napped for about 45 minutes these last days.

Seriously how the fuck do you do it? Mil is over her cold and thankfully taking dd tonight, otherwise I am ready to hand myself into ss.

Well, it wouldn't be possible for me to get dh to take the children as he's dead. But certainly those with a living ex partner should get support from them. Quite rightly so.

Yep, we should! I'm in awe of single parents who DON'T get a break, there's some weeks when I'm just hanging on for the weekend so I can actually sleep...

But the attitude of some married friends who say things like 'oh I'd love to have a weekend to myself, you're so lucky' really annoys me. Or people (exMIL I'm looking at you) who think exH is dad of the year because he actually sees his kids every other weekend and pays maintenance. Because "plenty of men wouldn't you know... He's very good with them.."

Some of us had a vindictive ex who made life very unpleasant on a regular basis. So I felt i was doing the whole lp thing with one foot nailed to the floor. It was HARD. I'm not the only lp with that set of circumstances, either.

Mrsmugoo and Orlando you are TALKING OUT OF YOUR ARSES!

in addition it is particularly nasty to come on a thread where LP are getting praise (incredibly rare usually we're getting all the shit for all society's ills!)

I've been a LP since dd was 2. In theory ex was supposed to have her every sun. Between his job and him being an irresponsible dick more interested in ow this rarely happened. Often I'd get a text up to 3 hours AFTER he was supposed to appear with some pathetic lie of an excuse.

He didn't pay maintenance for almost 3 years then when he did it was erratic and unreliable (but still deducted from the little I was getting in benefits, I was a full time student at the time). But when I moved back home to near my family to get more support he kicked up. Then that support wasn't available as family became ill/had families of their own to take care of.

So....I've not had a break at all in 10 years. Certainly not every other bloody weekend.

EVEN IF I DID it does not make up for being totally responsible for all the thinking, planning organising and doing of being a lone parent including dealing with idiot exes who are all about 'their rights' and have no concept on the effect of their assholery on the child/children let alone the resident parent!

Nasty nasty nasty unnecessary vile posts!

Yes I have emotional support

Orlando you do realise that most LP (like me no ex, work 40 hours a week and no family around) do not get emotional support. Good on you do raise your children on your own but do me a favour and try is without emotional support and come back to us.

We are not asking for a medal but a recognition that it's hard and for parents to stop saying "who I am a single parent this week-end".

i'm getting the feeling that some pps think sps are the cause of their sit and that some pps are feeling threatened by their being patted on the back. When i became a single parent 40+ years ago i did experience that former friends felt 1] superior and 2] threatened = it had to be my fault and it cd never happen to them because they were superior wives and mothers and human beings?? After all this time it is not a surprise that many of them are now in same boat. Some tried to keep up the superiority schtick but i gave them short thrift.