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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DH asking me to leave the house

200 replies

Hartofpixie · 15/01/2016 14:03

My normally lovely DH has two work colleagues - he's worked with them for many years. One (Belinda) is happily married and we occasionally see her and her DH socially. The second (Claudia) is very single, and has always had a bit of a thing for my DH (she told him once, and he very politely let her down gently).

Claudia sometimes invites the wider working team round in the evening. I have never been invited. DH feels he needs to reciprocate, and has told me he is going to invite them both round for an evening meal. All fine, apart from he just told me I have to go out that evening? It's -4? On a Monday?

So AIBU or is that extremely weird and rude?

OP posts:
Twindroops · 15/01/2016 14:04

That's weird.

Writerwannabe83 · 15/01/2016 14:05

Bloody hell!!!!

That's OUTRAGEOUS!!!!

Lulu1083 · 15/01/2016 14:05

Extremely rude. I hate to say this but are you sure Belinda will be there?

LindyHemming · 15/01/2016 14:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HolgerDanske · 15/01/2016 14:06

Very weird and hugely disrespectful.

OracleofDelphi · 15/01/2016 14:06

NO YANBU - how can anyone ask you to vacate your house! Thats terrible.... if DH has some mates round for the evening I either sit with them or if they are doing something that is not to my taste or wanted to do something "just them" I would go into another room and watch tv/ read...... But then on the other hand I have never told DH that he has to leave for a girls night....

If you want to go out and use it as a reason to catch up with someone on your own then thats fine, but no YANBU you should never be told you have to leave our own house.

mumeeee · 15/01/2016 14:07

YANBU. If your DH is inviting them to your house. Then you should be there and join in with the meal. That's what would happen in our house.

knobblyknee · 15/01/2016 14:07

Well I guess it would be weird for him if you had to sit in the bedroom.

yorkshapudding · 15/01/2016 14:07

So, your DH's colleague tells him she has feelings for him and he thinks it's appropriate to invite her to his house while his wife is out? Sorry, I don't get that. I cannot see any reasonable explanation for him insisting you make yourself scarce, especially as the other woman who is supposedly coming over is a mutual friend of yours that you have socialised with before.

Original poster
Hartofpixie · 15/01/2016 14:07

Oh thank god! I thought it might just be me being a bit oversensitive. Yes Belinda will definitely be there. He wouldn't for a minute want to have Claudia over by herself.

OP posts:
slicedfinger · 15/01/2016 14:07

Absolutely no way on earth. And I do try to be pretty calm about that sort of thing. But just no.

knobblyknee · 15/01/2016 14:08

^^ I dont think my sarcasm really came across in that. Kick him out, the fucker.

Shakey15000 · 15/01/2016 14:08

WHAT?? That's the weirdest thing Hmm

It would be a resounding no from me. What's his reasoning in asking you to leave your own bloody house??

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 15/01/2016 14:08

Fuck that!

Tell him no you're not going out.

NanaNina · 15/01/2016 14:08

That's ridiculous! And do you mean till 4 in the morning? I can understand if they want to talk shop it would be boring for you but you could always do something else, watch TV in your bedroom or read or well anything really...........I think I might smell a rat as well.

antimatter · 15/01/2016 14:08

Is he planning a treesome?

BishopBrennansArse · 15/01/2016 14:08

Tell him to fottfsoftwhetfoa

flanjabelle · 15/01/2016 14:09

No way. Completely out of line from your dh. Don't let him chuck you out of your own home op. You need to stand up to him on this, I dont care what his reasons are, it's not ok at all.

handslikecowstits · 15/01/2016 14:09

Call me an old cynic, but I'd be wondering if Claudia is really coming alone.

mumeeee · 15/01/2016 14:09

That's unless of course you want to go out.
Your DH is being very rude and weird telling you that you have to leave the house

Original poster
Hartofpixie · 15/01/2016 14:09

I am very tempted to stay in but tell him I'll stay upstairs and keep wafting in and out wearing and doing unlikely and embarrassing things.

OP posts:
yorkshapudding · 15/01/2016 14:09

Lulu, that was the first thing that occurred to me too

SuperCee7 · 15/01/2016 14:09

That's really awkward, rude and ridiculous tbh. Wtf?

sofiahelin1 · 15/01/2016 14:10

Wtf no very weird

Janeymoo50 · 15/01/2016 14:10

Hmmm, a bit odd but I kind of see what he is doing as it's a meal with colleagues. I certainly wouldn't go out but would leave them to it and do my own thing. For instance, I'd retreat to the lounge with a bottle of vino and a DVD and let them socialise together in the dining room or kitchen (if there is an eating space in there?). But don't go out, that's madness.