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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be hurt he only takes snapchats with her?

142 replies

lifetimeoflaughter · 13/11/2015 22:59

Whenever we go out as a group of friends, there is one guy (who I would consider pretty much a best friend) and he will always take a snapchat with the same woman.

Se is very pretty.

He does it as hes a player and wants to make other women jealous.

He never takes one with me.

I'm definitely your plan jane type of girl.

Just makes me feel pretty shit.

Aibu?

(yes pathetic I know)

OP posts:
QOD · 13/11/2015 23:01

I don't even know what that means
Grin

HackerFucker22 · 13/11/2015 23:02

Me neither.. care to explain a little OP?

LobstersMateForLife · 13/11/2015 23:04

Snapchats are basically photos that you show on your mates' phones for a limited amount of time eg 10 secs.

OP, I totally get where you are coming from Flowers

I have felt the same before, it's shit.

Is she louder or more confident than you though? I think these things are often to do with confidence Smile

QOD · 13/11/2015 23:07

Snap him.first ?

ShamefulPlaceMarker · 13/11/2015 23:08

Sounds pathetic... Not you, the whole snapchat thing. Rise above it

Original poster
lifetimeoflaughter · 13/11/2015 23:19

Sorry snapchat is where you take a photo(or video) and it goes up for 24 hours.

Every single time we have been out as a group he takes a photo with her.

He's never once attempted to take a photo with me (even though we are much closer friends)

And its obviously because she is much better looking than me.

Just really hurts that even a friend would treat me like this Sad

OP posts:
MilkTwoSugarsThanks · 13/11/2015 23:23

Treat you like what? Not taking your photo? Have you told him you'd like him to take your photo? Maybe he just fancies her, unless you're a couple surely he's allowed to?

Disclaimer: I'm not really sure wtf Snapchat is.

MysteriousSummer · 13/11/2015 23:27

OP I completely get why that'd be hurtful :(

YADNBU - I would be upset too

Original poster
lifetimeoflaughter · 13/11/2015 23:32

Thank you everyone, made me feel not so pathetic now.

OP posts:
tibbawyrots · 13/11/2015 23:32

He fancies her?
And you fancy him.

Age old story.

Original poster
lifetimeoflaughter · 13/11/2015 23:52

No I 100% don't fancy him, he's a really good friend. A single male and female can be just friends.

I don't know if he fancies her, he obviously thinks shes hot but I don't believe he would want to date her.

OP posts:
BuckMulligan · 13/11/2015 23:56

For someone who thinks of him as a 'best friend', you don't sound exactly fond of him, OP, if you're saying he's shallowly obsessed with looks, is a 'player' and photographs the pretty woman to make other women jealous...?

LobstersMateForLife · 13/11/2015 23:59

I think people are being a bit harsh.

I personally don't think OP has been critical of her friend - she's just remarking that's what he's like.

Motherinferior78 · 14/11/2015 00:00

I think you are hurt because she appears to be valued in a way that you are not. You've singled out him above others as a best friend yet he sometimes behaves as if you are irrelevant. I don't know the details of your friendship circle but is it possible that the two of them are extroverts and have just created this silly ritual of posing for the camera on a night out? That you're not selected because you're less likely to want to pose for the camera?

Just because you're not being used by him as his trophy or his partner in showing off (whichever she is), it doesn't mean he doesn't need or want you there. He probably doesn't even realise he's making you feel this way. His behaviour doesn't sound very considerate or mature but you know him better than I do so only you know if there's real substance to him that makes it worth indulging all the nonsense.

On an old fart note, I'm so glad this camera phone obsession thing wasn't around when I was young and going out!! Seems to make nights out so boring and all about taking "fun" photos rather than actually having fun! Confused

Motherinferior78 · 14/11/2015 00:04

Sounds like she's just feeding his need for attention - it doesn't sound like much more than that. Hopefully he just thinks too much of you to use you in this way.

BuckMulligan · 14/11/2015 00:05

I'm not attacking the OP. If her account of him is accurate, he sounds like a bit of an idiot, who's more interested in photographic arm candy than his best friend...?

Trills · 14/11/2015 00:07

He's not treating you "like THIS".

The things he is doing, they are not TO you or AT you.

ElsaAintAsColdAsMe · 14/11/2015 00:08

You have read a whole lot into this.

If he is as close a friend as you say why don't you just ask him?

People do different things with different friends, this is obviously their 'thing' and it has no reflection or bearing on you whatsoever

Original poster
lifetimeoflaughter · 14/11/2015 00:16

For someone who thinks of him as a 'best friend', you don't sound exactly fond of him, OP

Of course I'm fond of him. Like all my friends.

Is he perfect? No. But then neither am I.

He can be a player, thats just one trait out of hundreds.

OP posts:
Potatoface2 · 14/11/2015 00:30

i take it you are all teenagers then!

Greengagesandham · 14/11/2015 00:36

So the photo goes ,'up', where for 24 hours?

Perhaps he does fancy you but he's not about to show you off to his mates for them all to see?

Enjolrass · 14/11/2015 07:18

If he is your best friend speak to him.

Honestly if one of my male friends asked me to take a joint selfie for snap chat, I would laugh my arse off.

While most of my male friends love a selfie, I do not.

Unless you are sat there taking solo selfies and he is avoiding getting in the photo, you can't assume it's because she is more attractive.

ChiefInspectorBarnaby · 14/11/2015 07:22

I thought I was on mumsnet. Seem to have stumbled onto Teen Net Confused

Savagebeauty · 14/11/2015 07:23

You sound very young and a bit obsessed with this bloke.

HortonWho · 14/11/2015 07:36

Is your friend gay? If yes, then I could see how only wanting to take photos with his better looking female friends would be hurtful. If he is not, I very much doubt he's taking her photo because he wants to boast to his other straight male friends just how hot his platonic female friend - with whom he's got no chance - really is. In other words, he fancies sleeping with the other girl. Not date or have relationship with - just sleeping with her.