Why does she have a problem with me making an effort to do things with my kids?

[Neve81]

Afternoon, just posting really in order to vent as i'm rather ticked off with a friend of mine, well she's a friend of a friend really, I only see her when I meet up with our mutual friend and I occasionally speak with her on Facebook.

Basically I've posted on Facebook that i'm excited for the next couple of weeks as the kids are off for half term and I have lots of little activities planned, mainly centered around Halloween as we are Halloween obsessed lol. We are going on an organised spooky walk in the woods, to a Halloween session at jungle gyms, pumpkin picking down at our local farm, Halloween and fireworks night at our local garden centre and we are having a Halloween party at our house for family and some of the kids friends.

I'm a sahm whilst my dh's works full time so the last couple of years (used to work 60 hours a week previously) I've put a lot of time and effort into making things like Halloween and Bonfire night (and Xmas of course) lots of fun for my kids who are now 10 9 and 5 and I genuinely enjoy it, but as it turns out this "friend" of mine has a problem with this.

Not long after I'd posted on Facebook she posted something along the lines of "I can't understand why parents feel the need to go over the top every half term spoiling their kids with tons of days outs and for Halloween who the hell has a party and splashes out out on doing their house up, waste of money in my opinion, clearly these parents have too much time on their hands and are overcompensating for something by going overboard" Now this kind of made my blood boil as she was clearly having a go at me on the sly, and I can't understand why. We are both different, we do different
things with our kids and I just so happen to love getting out an about doing mostly free activities wheras her idea of spending half term with her three kids is plonking them in front of the tv or Xbox whilst she's playing games on her iPad. Now this is fine, it's up to her what she does but why judge me and try and belittle me?

just delete, nasty cow, tbh I think she sounds jealous

and honestly, your plans sound lovely, if exhausting I only wish I had the time / patience to do even half of that with my lot

I have some wonderful activities planned for next week.

I could never imagine in a million years me listing them all on FB if I used that kind of thing. Its for our family to enjoy.

To be honest even the way you list all your pumkin patch Halloween mardigras type week in your Op sounds labourious....

she's jealous. its that simple.

you can set your facebook so she alone can't see any future posts from you.
i also would hide her on FB and stop following her so you can't see her posts.

she's passive aggressive and quite possibly looking for a fight. if you ignore her altogether, it will truly drive her up the wall.
she sounds like a bitter twat. the best revenge is living well, as they say.

Happy Hallowe'en.

I did know someone who planned lots of stuff and put huge effort into parties etc and worked, she was bloody exhausted and a bit resentful, she expected others to meet her high standards so was horribly judgemental. I'm sure you aren't this way if its just because you have the energy and enthusiasm from giving up work for a few years. I know I'd be more appreciative of time with my kids if I'd not been home all this time - I'm planning to go to work soon for better balance.

I'm going to go with, she can't be arsed and you're making her feel bad. Ignore her and enjoy your half term, it sounds like lots of fun!

i think its fab that you do all that for your kids.

id "like" her status if it was me. just to make her wonder. bitch. (not you, her)

I just so happen to love getting out an about doing mostly free activities wheras her idea of spending half term with her three kids is plonking them in front of the tv or Xbox whilst she's playing games on her iPad. Now this is fine, it's up to her what she does but why judge me and try and belittle me?

Hah! Sooooooo judgmental. If you judge others then they can judge you.

Perhaps not money, but your post displayed your time, interest and effort, which like money can be challenging for people. Also gives impression of "performance/competitive parenting".

Well I really didn't mean to annoy anyone and apart from her I don't think I have. I was merely saying that I was excited for he half term and what we was hoping to get up to, if that offends people then I find it a little weird to be honest. I don't care what others do with their children but it's nice to see my Facebook friends having a good time and living life to the full, I mean after all isn't that what life's for?.....

Yes, she was an arse but it really does sound like you were writing 'look how amazing I am with all the activities planned for my kids'.

Or maybe OP just wants to update and share what she's doing on there? I honestly wonder why some people bother with Facebook if they don't want to interact, share their events/lives and moan and complain about others on there.
Why be on there then? Hide them if they're that irritating!

OP don't worry about it and enjoy your Halloween. There's nothing like the MN massive to cut a person down to size.

I don't care what others do with their children but it's nice to see my Facebook friends having a good time and living life to the full, I mean after all isn't that what life's for?.....

Completely agree, I love seeing what others are up to on FB cos I'm a nosy cah
If somebody interprets your updates as boasting, look at me, whatever, I think it says a whole lot more about them and their insecurities and outlook on life than it does about you.
Let them wallow in their own misery and jealousy (as that's how it comes across) and carry on posting even more updates
Seriously though, just hide her from your newsfeed if you don't want to delete her then she can't see anything that will inexplicably annoy her.

I think that will be the best thing to be honest. Lately she's seems so bitter and never has a good word to say about anyone, and I could do without all that in my life.

That sounds so nice. If I saw that on my wall I'd find it inspiring rather than feel angry about it. I'd put her on limited.

I agree. Have a lovely half term break OP.

Enjoy your Halloween, don't invite her or her kids and post lots of pictures of your party afterwards.

(Cough)

I may have just been inspired by your post to stop being lazy, look up a local pumpkin picking farm and book a scare day at Warwick castle.

So yabu op, now I'm actually going to go out and 'do' stuff.

Aw well why not, have had to take a study suspension for uni anyway (baby's due date is just before exams!)

. I refuse to be made to feel like I'm bragging just because some parents cannot be arsed to do anything with their own kids....

Lovely. We all bow to your superiority parenting skills.

I refuse to be made to feel like I'm bragging just because some parents cannot be arsed to do anything with their own kids.

The person on FB may have been rude and 'judgemental'

However you have been quite judgemental in some of your posts on here to be fair.

If you don't like/know the person on FB just block them.

Hey all I'm going to spain next week and plan on going on lots of trips to Granada and Malaga and Marbella. The children have been excitedly learning their Spanish verbs and we will eat tapas every day!
Rolling your eyes?
You're all jealous !

I refuse to be made to feel like I'm bragging just because some parents cannot be arsed to do anything with their own kids.

You're not being made to feel like you're bragging because you make an effort for your kids.

You're being called braggy for feeling the need to tell everyone about it. No one gives a fuck, get over yourself!

You can't spoil a child by having too much fun! It's not as though you're spending money on materialistic things, you're making wonderful memories. It sounds lovely, my parents never did anything like that when I was young.