AIBU/WIBU to have complained to the school?

[DarkBlueEyes]

First post in here, takes deep breath...

DD1 returned from a school trip on Friday. We were told to pick up at 5pm unless got a text to say otherwise. Stood by my phone all afternoon and was waiting at the secondary school at 4.59pm. No sign of her. No sign of anyone. Asked for help in the school, no idea. Tried to phone another mum, my phone didn't work, so I rebooted it and headed towards another building. Phone rings with DH on the other end to ask if I was ok - HE had got the text at 3.45 pm to say they'd be back at 4 (half hour journey for us so even if I'd got it, I'd have been late), evidently I was the only one who didn't get the text.

DD1 had been sitting at reception with her friend for over an hour and NO STAFF MEMBER had thought to ring me or DH (sorry for shouty caps). I accept there was a technical hitch with my phone but think the school should have tried to phone us. Eventually at about 5.10 DD1 asked if she could use the school phone and phoned me (went straight to VM) and DH who then phoned me right back, worried I'd been in an accident (I am almost never late).

As we walked back to the car all the texts started to ping into my phone. I'm not cross that the text didn't reach me, shit happens. I am cross that DD1 and friend were waiting for over an hour and no one thought to call DH. Head of year 7 tells me that she doesn't usually bother to ring husbands as it usually goes straight through to voice mail... WTF. Had long and very awkward conversation with head of year this morning who would not accept she should have/could have called DH, that my daughter was safe and she had 73 children to sort blah blah blah.

WIBU to expect the school to have called a parent when the other parent hadn't turned up as expected? Or do I have to just suck it up?

She eventually conceded she could have called DH. No apology. If she'd said in the first 30 seconds that she was sorry and she should have called I'd have said thanks very much and moved on. Now I'm still stewing. If only people knew how powerful "I'm sorry, that must have been upsetting for you and your daughter" could be....

DBE

I think you ought to rethink your comment - I have not given my understanding of the term bully so how do you know I need to rethink it!!!

Or indeed, to use their common sense MultiShirker.

Well this is an edifying thread...

I seriously think AIBU should have a facility whereby posting is suspended as soon as OP realises, and declares they are BU. Or possibly posts should be limited to 100 on AIBU.

It's getting very tiresome reading pages of people just repeating each other and diving in, when OP has conceded some time ago.

I am liking the Twat Of The Year comment though, I actually think that should be a thing

I'm on your side OP, you were worried about your daughter who is a month into her first year at secondary school, a new and understandably daunting time for you both and, FWIW, you don't strike me as having been rude to the HOY at all, you merely raised a point. The way some posters have layed into you on here is completely unnecessary, disagree by all means but no need to ridicule or be unkind. The OP does start by saying it's her first time here, could that be a reason to pounce on her for some of you? I also wonder, is this how some posters react to someone they disagree with in real life? Or is it simply the power of being hidden behind a keyboard? OP, DO NOT LET THE UNKIND POSTERS GET TO YOU (and take note of the shouty caps .

Toughasoldboots so let me get this straight... you get deleted off here if you accuse someone of posting as different people and you think that me, OP and Newgirl are the same person.......

Bye bye and don't let the door smack you on the behind on your way out!

Has some kind of Octo-alert been sounded? A poster has been told they are BU! Quick! Let's call everyone a bully!

AHEM

As a teacher I dread to think how many parents can't be bothered to get back to me with concerns about their children and they have considerably fewer to worry about.

First comment (Hi)

A friend pointed me in the direction of this thread and after trawling through all 9 pages I free I have earned the right to ask... what the heck is a sockpuppet/Sockpuppeting...

Also, anymore than 3 (...) irritates me because it's supposed to be 3! I'm not against rebellion... I often wear odd socks

And tbh in my personal opinion the OP was possibly over reacting BUT (caps time) at the time I guess rational thinking wasn't top of the list as she was probably thinking where's my child... where are the other children... why isn't my * phone working... what else have I missed (I could go on)
With my monsters they went to another country and came back at 4 am (they were 7 at the time) and we kept getting texts saying this time had changed and that time had changed... I say we I didn't get any at first as the system being used had a few technical problems... so I logged in and deleted and re-added my number and hey presto the texts kept coming after that... I didn't kick off at the school (who had my precious ones) I called them, asked why I wasn't getting the texts and decided to try the on/off method.

I'm off to explore this little corner of judgement... I quite like the idea ??

Toodles

newgirl99 you actually said bullying was too tame a term for what has been said here so I stand by my suggestion that you rethink and do some proper research into what bullying really is.

I note seriliza has been deleted a couple of times so she can hardly be treading the moral high ground.

noblegiraffe

Oh so you went back and read that - Can I suggest reading the whole thread again. This time make a mental note of the name calling and belittling that has gone on. As I said previously, pack of wolves spring to mind. I wonder if some people have just as much nerve and are as rude face to face! Just because someone is hiding at home, brave behind their computer screen does not give them the right to pick on people. If people believed that she was being OTT then say it - there really is no need to be using comments such as 'poor daughter' - 'idiot' - 'one of those mothers'.... It's uncalled for and is simply cruel for the sake of being cruel in my opinion!!!

This thread is bonkers. I commented back on page one but even then thought the op was getting an unreasonable kicking. Lay off ffs, aibu at its nasty judgemental worst.

Here, here newgirl and laffymeal.

Hear, hear newgirl and laffymeal.

For once I agree with you Jeeves a fairly innocuous thread has turned mental and apparently anybody who doesn't agree has to be the same person, which is ridiculous. I see people on here every day who have done far more unreasonable things than the OP who get far less of a verbal kicking.

And that's putting aside the fact that everybody is ignoring the fact the OP has accepted she probably was unreasonable about the initial question but is just upset at the character assassination.

And you are wrong - who are you waiting on for verification? We may have shared views but there is only one of me I can assure you!

I've run loads of trips. The text would have gone out automatically. No one would use email, as texts are quicker and get a faster response.

I always stay with a student until their parent picks them up. This is a basic level of safeguarding. If no one had turned up to pick a dc at the 5 o clock time, I would then think about phoning the parents. I would probably wait about 20 minutes and then do it. As a trip leader, I am unable to leave until all the dc have been collected.

Your comment about bumping the thread is bizarre toughas, what do you think you just did? Grow up, just because some of us dislike the nasty mob mentality on here we're not sock puppets or trolls

Toughasoldboots - oh is it my turn now ??... well - pot .... kettle .... black! You are here posting aren't you - why should I stop? What makes you so special?

yabu

Page one, the OP realises SIBU.
Nine pages later

Give it up tough. Mumsnet have commented and as far as I'm aware they can tell if sock puppeting is going on but they haven't called it on this thread. You're wrong.