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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that a double standard applies to cock size?

141 replies

Babycham1979 · 04/10/2015 20:25

Sorry in advance, this is a thread about a thread. On the sex forum, there was a discussion about whether you can assess a guy's cock size based on any other part of his body (of course you can't).

However, it strikes me that the way women discuss men's dicks would be considered utterly unacceptable if the sexes were reversed. Surely, a big cock is no different to a tight vagina (and a small one, a very loose vagina), but if men regularly and publicly made jokes about, or compared women's tightness/looseness, they'd be strung up from the nearest lamppost.

AIBU?

OP posts:
thehypocritesoaf · 04/10/2015 21:19

I don't like it.

I always think less of a person- man or woman- who indulges in that kind of nasty stuff.

DiscoGoGo · 04/10/2015 21:21

Sheba Flowers

And this is the point isn't it, women are held to a much much higher standard of behaviour than men, while so many men behave abominably and are left to get on with it.

thehypocritesoaf · 04/10/2015 21:24

I'm just not interested in behaving like the shittiest type of man.

DiscoGoGo · 04/10/2015 21:27

You could test it out OP by going on some male dominated threads and challenging them on it? If you feel so strongly?

There was one not so long ago where a 15yo girl was threatened with rape multiple times because she posted a picture of herself with a book....

Or look at the comments made to Sue Perkins, Mary Beard, Caroline Criado Perez and so on, by men. OK they only sometimes refer to their vaginas, sometimes other parts of their bodies, sometimes simply threaten sexual violence.

So yes it's not nice when women post threads like the one you talk about, but if you think this is the most serious problem of this nature, and that men would be "strung up" if they behaved like that... I mean really?

TiredButFineODFOJ · 04/10/2015 21:27

Going a little bit off track....small cock based insults make me sad. I've loved and lost a few men who were between small to the lower side of average who were brilliant human beings.

thehypocritesoaf · 04/10/2015 21:30

It just makes the arrogant arseholes with big cocks be even more arseholish. Who wants that?

WorraLiberty · 04/10/2015 21:31

YANBU

All too often you hear women saying things like, "He drives a BMW because he must have tiny dick" and other such lovely phrases.

Pathetic.

WorraLiberty · 04/10/2015 21:37

In fact this thread has reminded me of this one last April.

It was quite shocking.

bessarabiantiger · 04/10/2015 21:41

I have no idea what's happening.

Why are we being mean to people? I have tits, everyone who has need of them seems to be satisfied thus far? I'm confused and irritable.

IS THERE A POINT?

MrsTedCrilly · 04/10/2015 21:46

A lot of men do make jokes about baggy vaginas! Wizards sleeve, clowns pocket, hotdog down a hallway etc.. I was even in the Middle East enjoying the ancient city of Petra and overheard a group of men mocking loose vaginas. Both sexes mock and joke..

DadWasHere · 04/10/2015 21:48

Seem like you guys want to frame this in terms of public taunting/humiliation (hey baldy, hey soulless ginger, hey fatty, etc, etc). The list is endless.

How about framing it in terms of more tangible things like: Women with small breasts are ignored, men with small penises are dumped after discovery.

DiscoGoGo · 04/10/2015 21:55

Women with small breasts aren't ignored though.

I don't know about men with small penises but I don't imagine they all get dumped. As a generalisation women and girls are raised to value other attributes above the physical in men, so I don't know. What do gay men make of men with small penises?

DiscoGoGo · 04/10/2015 22:00

Hmm seems there is a lot of lively conversation amongst gay men on penis size out there on the net.

thehypocritesoaf · 04/10/2015 22:01

People who mock others physical attributes are never v bright are they?

You hear someone 'joking' about gingers/big fannies/small cocks, you don't think 'ah, person of originality, wit, empathy, intelligence', do you? You just think- twat.

BrideOfWankenstein · 04/10/2015 22:09

I think that comparing cock sizes was started and continued till this day by men themselves. Usually by those who have "showers", not "growers". Because no naked straight man would like to be seen having a hard on next to other naked straight man.
But yeah, female version of cock size discussion is discussing the boob size, shape and other characteristics.

Osolea · 04/10/2015 22:20

YANBU, and I'm really surprised how many people on here so far seem to be saying that it's ok to be derogatory towards a man because some other men are derogatory towards women. That's a pathetic attitude to take and is more suited to a primary school playground than an adult discussion.

DiscoGoGo · 04/10/2015 22:26

No it's not OK to be horrible to derogatory to men as they are to us.

However op said that men are not allowed to be horrible to women as they would be strung up. And that women are worse. People are saying they find this does not chime with their experiences. Are you saying op is correct on that point then? That women are far worse than men at this, and men when they do say anything are "strung up"?

Senpai · 04/10/2015 22:31

Uhm.. But guys do talk about tits and vaginas amongst their bro-circles just like women are doing here on sex threads.

Honestly, yes size does matter if it's extreme end of both sides of the bell curve, and bad sex is a relationship killer. So, physical attraction does matter. But.. it is a bit childish to still be giggling at penises as an adult whose beyond college years.

AnyFucker · 04/10/2015 22:33

I don't like it either. I have a lot to say about shitty male behaviour but about something they have zero control over ? Nope, two wrongs don't make a right.

DiscoGoGo · 04/10/2015 22:34

I think the point is that women have to behave better than men at all times.

And if one woman says one offensive thing ever that cancels out all the shitty stuff men say and do to women and girls entirely.

I think that's the gist anyway.

eedon · 05/10/2015 07:48

Yabvu.

Both sexes make the same silly comments.

Lilly Allen addressed this when she pretended in a video to have a baggy pussy to answer back to a big dick.

meditrina · 05/10/2015 08:10

As this is, in part at least, a TAAT, could someone be kind and link the thread it's about?

Because I can't find it, and want to know if it was just a silly thread 'can you predict penis size from body size' with added examples from female body.

Or if it was judgy, scornful, mocking.

Because it's not clear from posts on this thread which it is, and there's a big difference between the acceptability of the two scenarios.

StillDrSethHazlittMD · 05/10/2015 08:34

I'm a guy and I was once in a pub with my female best friend and she said "Oh god, it's my ex over there, the man with the smallest cock in the world!"

Now, I'd never met this guy, he predates our friendship but I was quite taken aback and called her out on it. I asked what she would think if I referred to an ex of mine having "a really slack vagina" (first and only time I've ever used that phrase). She paused for a moment and looked quite taken aback. "I'd think you were a wanker. (pause) But that means I'm one too, doesn't it?" She was really quite quiet for the next 15 minutes and then apologised profusely and hoped I didn't think she was an awful person.

Now, I may have slagged my ex off with regards personality traits or the way she treated me, but I would never ever make any sort of comments about physical anatomy. Don't see why it should be any different the other way around.

LieselVonTwat · 05/10/2015 09:04

Simply for using the phrase 'supposed oppression', YABU.

Bottlecap · 05/10/2015 09:17

I must be a complete prude because I would really be uncomfortable if anyone tried to draw me into a discussion about this, and I don't think anyone ever has.

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