A school trip is over subscribed, a draw will take place, there's a possibility that only one twin will be picked.

[MyballsareSandy]

AIBU to think that a set of twins should be counted as one in this situation? Or is that completely unfair on the rest of the class? I really can't make my mind up.

I don't want to say too much but it's a massive trip, we aren't talking about a day out. Ten days away abroad, long flight.

It hasn't happened yet so I'm possibly worrying about nothing, but if one is left out they'll be so upset. Year 9.

You can ask that if one is drawn and not the other that neither go.

Most twin parents I know bang on about treating their twins as individuals. They can't pick and choose when it suits them to be counted as one!

Of course it's fair, they will take up two places.

Totally reasonable I think for the school to treat them as two separate individuals.
But I'd also say to the school that as a family you say if only one is picked then the other won't go and someone else should be drawn for their place.
Nobody but you and the teacher need know that it happened (if it did).

How many are going? Is it equally beneficial to both. Surely either both stay or both go, so if one is not offered a place by lottery neither go.

YABU because they aren't one person. Otherwise people would be saying "oh but that's my cousin, we should go together!" If 2 cousins should be in the same situation for example.

This situation may well pan out when it's time to go to university, for example. You can't have them treated as one, but I sympathise with your position.

yabu - where do you draw the line? Mine want to go to Paris next year - one year 7 one year 8 - same situation - it's just life I'm afraid

Its only fair to treat them as the two individual children that they are surely?
They take up too places on the trip, so can't be treated as just one.

The only fair option is to tell school that if only one is drawn, and not the other, then neither will go. But maybe asking them to not tell either child is one was selected initially - so neither can blame the other, etc.

Agree with a PP about if you feel that strongly; agree with your twins that unless both of them are picked, they won't be going and another person will be given the opportunity.

If not though; you could use it as an opportunity to get some quality time in with the twin left behind.

I think it's fair, as they are two separate individuals. Unless they are Cojoined twins, of course

Seriously, they need to learn that they won't necessarily be able to do everything together in life, and 13 isn't too early an age to learn it.

I don't understand why it's more unfair on them than other kids that don't get to go?

You're being precious and wanting special treatment.

Bit diff with cousins!!

I agree about the individuality, I'm usually the first to say that regarding twins, but this seems different.

When I say fair option, I mean only fair option for the other children too. Whether you feel it is fair to let one go and not the other is your decision - t hat will vary hugely between different families.

YABVU

Ask the twins. Explain that there is a chance that only one will go and the other left behind and that they should think carefully about it and accept it might be them. If they don't want to take the risk then don't put their names forward.
YABU to think they should be treated as one. Children from other families will be disappointed if they are left out too, twin or not.

YABU They are individuals and should be treated as such. By year 9 they should be old enough to understand that sometimes one will get to do something that the other doesn't.

YABU They are individuals and should be treated as such. By year 9 they should be old enough to understand that sometimes one will get to do something that the other doesn't.

As a mum of twins who often 'bangs on' about them being treated as individuals I think I would have a chat to them about it before hand and see what they come up with.

Why on earth would two separate people be counted as one Person? If the parents don't want one to go without the other, that can choose to let neither go.

of course yabu. They are 2 people, why should other class mates have less places available because they happen to in a class with twins.

The choices are you speak to them before hand and make sure they are aware that one may go and one may not.

If they really cant cope with this, then tell the school that if one is picked out and not the other, that neither will be going. Maybe the twins will say they don't want one to go without the other.

If there are 40 places and 50 students chances are they will both get a place.

If they are to be counted as one then maybe ask if both names be put together on one piece of paper instead of individually (if that's how they doing the draw)

Sorry for double post.

I can see that's it's awkward but I don't think you can do anything other than decline if only one of your DC gets a spot.

There are always going to be kids that are left out.

They don't do everything together at all, always been in different classes, diff friends and parties/sleepovers. They've looked forward to this trip since start of secondary and it's the first year it's been over subscribed.