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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

A school trip is over subscribed, a draw will take place, there's a possibility that only one twin will be picked.

204 replies

MyballsareSandy · 13/07/2015 19:39

AIBU to think that a set of twins should be counted as one in this situation? Or is that completely unfair on the rest of the class? I really can't make my mind up.

I don't want to say too much but it's a massive trip, we aren't talking about a day out. Ten days away abroad, long flight.

It hasn't happened yet so I'm possibly worrying about nothing, but if one is left out they'll be so upset. Year 9.

OP posts:
ravenAK · 14/07/2015 23:43

Soupdragon - well, yes, could happen. But then you'd pay twin #1 on, it'd go through, attempt to pay for twin #2 & get a message saying the trip was full.

Then it's parents' call whether to take up the place or not, & if not, whether to ever let twin #1 know that they could have gone.

In practice, the sensible thing would be to email trip organiser & make sure twin #2 was first on the waiting list, but if the uncertainty of waiting for someone to drop out might be too traumatic all round, just refuse the place for twin #1.

It's still going to be a fairly rare occurrence when twins are going to fall neatly either side of the last place available - & as such it can't be a priority for the trip organisers, to be blunt.

mandy214 · 15/07/2015 00:04

Op I also agree that lots of the posters don't have twins a d won't appreciate the ramifications of whatever outcome arises. Don't mean to cause offence (and haven't read the whole thread) but it is nothing like cousins or different age siblings. I don't think it's fair that they get any special treatment but can absolutely understand your predicament (as a twin and a parent of twins).

maddy68 · 15/07/2015 06:45

It's the only fair way to choose.

It's also a valuable lesson. What if one passes exams and the other doesn't?
What if one gets to uni and the other worls in a pub?

They are different, and have to learn to deal with each other's successes where they may not have them
You are being vvvu

Original poster
MyballsareSandy · 15/07/2015 18:37

Quick update. They were all told today that a decision on who goes on the trip will not be made until the new school year in sept.

So all the kids are left hanging for the summer and all the parents have paid a substantial deposit, 8 of whom will need a refund, but it won't be until Sept!

How long can it take to do a draw?

OP posts:
answersonapostcardplease · 15/07/2015 18:40

Twins treated at oneHmm

Wideopenspace · 15/07/2015 18:43

Maybe the school are waiting to see how this thread pans out OP....

Lweji · 15/07/2015 18:52

OP you have messed up our calculations!
Refund for 8? Not 10?

Back to the excel sheet.

MarmeladeMadam · 15/07/2015 19:05

Maybe the school is trying to make some arrangements behind the scenes to take some more of those who want to go but can't promise anything yet so are postponing the draw just in case (a possibility?)

Lweji · 15/07/2015 19:11

Can I ask where in Africa?
Personally I don't think I'd let a 13 or 14 year old travel that far as a group. It would have to be under very special circumstances.
Are you aware of the risks and the conditions they will be in? What the medical services are like?

Leeds2 · 15/07/2015 19:24

Poor to keep people hanging on like that. Maybe they are trying to arrange for extra places?

DoesItReallyMatter · 15/07/2015 19:28

UPdated stats based on 38 kids applying for 30 places

There is now a 62.3 % chance of both DC getting a spot.

The chance of a 'good' outcome (both DC get a place or both DC don't get a place is 66.7

The chance of a 'bad' outcome (only one DC gets offered a place) is 33.3

A school trip is over subscribed, a draw will take place, there's a possibility that only one twin will be picked.
TwinTum · 15/07/2015 19:43

Yes, I wonder if they are trying to get an extra member of staff to join so they can have more, maybe a new teacher starting in Sept.

Littlef00t · 15/07/2015 19:50

Perhaps they are hoping some people will not be able to stump up the cash and drop out. I personally think they should be counted as 1, so they either both go or both don't.

Seriouslyffs · 15/07/2015 19:58

That's outrageous about the deposit- assuming its a very expensive trip the deposit could well be a big.
I got a request for £300 for an October trip today. Angry
OP if only one gets picked can you offer the other one a compensating trip/ guitar/ whatever. Only one of my 3 dcs is interested in skiing, but it has worked out well- dH and skier child go and I've taken the other two separately on 1:1 trips.

LaLyra · 15/07/2015 20:20

If they are waiting until after the summer to do the draw I'd assume something is going on in the background. Either new staff arriving who may be willing to go to allow more children to go, trying to rejig plans to allow more children on flights/in accommodation or waiting until later to be sure that none of the children who want to go are going to move house/school over the summer.

Lweji · 15/07/2015 21:05

DoesItReallyMatter

Ah, but is it as simple as that?
This is a draw without replacement. Don't we need to calculate changing odds as places are allocated?

1Morewineplease · 15/07/2015 21:09

YABU... That's life!

DoesItReallyMatter · 15/07/2015 21:11

Lweji Yeah, I know but I've only got a grade C at O'Level Mathematics and this is as good as it gets from me Grin

ComposHatComesBack · 15/07/2015 21:19

I am a teacher. Sometimes, in cases like this, we will discreetly make the lottery a little less random than it might otherwise be...

As a sixth former I was prevailed upon by the French teacher to undertake a draw for an oversubscribed half-term trip to France for the third year. The names were drawn from a hat in front of all the kids who expressed an interest and by a sixth former so the teacher had no influence.

Little did the kids know that the names I was to pick were folded into quarters wheres the names we weren't to pick were folded in half. I don't blame the teacher one iota who'd want to spend every second of their half term with a badly behaved little so and so?

Therefore the calculations people have made on the odds of the twins going overlook the fact that the draw could be manipulated so that some kids have 0 per cent chance of going and others have 100 per cent of going.

JadeJaderson · 15/07/2015 21:25

Yanbu.

Couldn't twins be put in as one entry only? Surely that evens out - if their slip gets drawn, they take two places but they only have half the chance as one entry between two.

HSMMaCM · 15/07/2015 21:26

Our school makes it quite clear that on oversubscribed trips, behaviour and attendance will be taken into account.

Lweji · 15/07/2015 21:35

JadeJaderson

The maths have been done. Do read the thread. :)

DoesItReallyMatter · 15/07/2015 21:44

HSMMaCM
Our school makes it quite clear that on oversubscribed trips, behaviour and attendance will be taken into account.

I'm pleased to hear that some schools are capable of being honest and transparent. It seems so much more sensible to do this than the underhand way some schools have 'fake' ballots.

teacherwith2kids · 15/07/2015 21:50

DC's school says exactly the same about attendance and behaviour being linked to selection for oversubscribed trips - at least the big, residential ones, not the everyday wholly educational ones.

Original poster
MyballsareSandy · 16/07/2015 09:50

Sorry to mess up the maths. Two didn't pay the deposit in time so it's down to 38

OP posts: