MIL interfering with special diet for my son

[auntynan]

Hey y'all

Am I Being unreasonable about the following:

My wee boy is 2 years and 2 months and has no words yet. He is being assessed by a paediatrician and I like to try and get him all the help i can and research things and do as much for him as is humanly possible but this post isn't about that. It's about my partners mother...

I thought I would try him on a gluten free casein free diet for a while just to see how it goes and if it affects his behaviour and concentration, possibly his speech. I am well aware it may not, but i know people whose kids it has worked for.

Anyway I made his food up specially for my MIL and gave her gluten free shortbread for him and asked if she could give me the space to try this out with DC and she agreed before she took him away (she has him when i am working some days).

Anyway I came home to my (already sceptical and with his head usually buried in the sand) partner who had tears in his eyes saying that his mum had given him a packet of 'teddy spongecakes' as 'she had been told by me she wasn't allowed to give them to my son' and 'could he use them up'.

Is it just me or is she shit-stirring? I feel so angry I can't even begin. this is not the first time she has caused conflict between me and my partner (other time was when she insisted my SIL had my 7 MONTH OLD overnight despite me crying myself to sleep alone -I know this was weak of me and i have since refused this happening again but at the time i felt afraid to stand up to my partner about it).

Anyway, i just need to know I'm not being OTT. This is about my sons health NOT her being all wounded because she cant give him the shitty snacks she wanted to.

GOD I AM ANGRY. I could F*ING slap her stupid face.

Rant over. ;)

Excuse me... is you partner some kind of (ahem) 'silly person''? Crying over some teddy bear cakes. I do not want to be rude but find this a bit wet.
I just do not get this post at all.

Your DP was crying because he knew how sad you would be...and he has let you down. He has let you down for not being more careful.

This a really difficult time for you and any problem will feel amplified. I

don't know whether the special diet will make any difference to your ds, but I do know that one teddy cake is not going to make any difference in the long term. Try not to fall out with your MIL as much as you need to vent, you will soon feel much calmer about it, and will see it for what it is, a mistake, there is no grave harm your DS.

Thank your lucky stars she didn't give them to your son herself rather she gave them to your DP to give to him if he felt that this would be appropriate. To me that would say she has not been giving them to your son behind your back? Anyway it sounds like both you and DP are strung out with worry about your son's development and are just doing your best to keep it together. Maybe this is why you and he have been crying (come on people some sympathy). It's easy to trivialise the experience of other people in the cold light of day when everyone is stressed out you thoughts are no longer rational. Give yourself a bit of time and have a Frank discussion with MAIL, slapping won't resolve anything.

OP it's possible that you little boy isn't speaking because he's growing up in an atmosphere of fear

I stopped reading when I saw this by Hedgehogs. ^ exactly this.

Delay brought on by trauma. A very real and very common problem with children brought up in an unsafe environment. Seek help immediately and good luck.

Zombie thread

I got thumped last time because I screamed at a spider.

WHAT!?!?!?!?!

Please, don't put up with abuse.

Oh crap!

Thanks llangennith - I hadn't noticed.

note to self - check dates on threads>

I just read that you ar being physically abused and controlled.
If this is the case you have to get in touch with Women's Aid. I think maybe by posting about this small matter you are hiding some deeper truth you do not want to confront... is this a cry for help?
Because there is help out there... please think about this hon.

Not read whole thread.

Can I ask if you are from a different culture ? Are you from an Asian background where I know the extended family involvement is often like co-parenting rather than just taking care.

The reason I ask is there are specialist Asian help groups for women from certain backgrounds who can help you through the minefield of Asian relationship ships. I attach a link to one.

roshnibirmingham.org.uk/

Please do get some help OP to get out

Would just say, re the speech thing, my MiL once told me that her eldest barely uttered a word until he was 3 - and then it came out in whole sentences. He was just taking it all in and biding his time - he went on to win a scholarship to Cambridge. However MiL had naturally been very worried about it.

This thread is 2 years old. I doubt OP will come back. I do hope she got out though..

And the spongecakes really were not the issue here.

Zombie thread. This thread is over two years old.

Oh j think Naz is the OP because the OP signed off Nx in original posts.

There is nothing extreme about a gluten and dairy free diet

Yes there is, for no good reason.

OP, stop fannying about making bizarre changes to your kids diet and instead work on getting him out of this dangerous situation. Your child does need your intervention, but not in his diet.