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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would it BU to report this store clerk to his manager?

200 replies

NoPillows · 25/04/2015 15:04

I've just been into Sainsbury's. I look young for my age (not a stealth boast, it's relevant). Among other things I also bought some alcohol. I went to the self-check out tills where the attending store clerk asked me for ID, checked it and I got on with paying for the items all good so far.

Before leaving the store I went to buy cigarettes. When I asked the person staffing that area for the cigarettes he loudly declares "Gosh! You sound younger than me, do you have any ID" I give him my license and then he looks at it and says "oh 1984!" He then holds my license in the air next to my head and loudly ponders "are you sure this is you... I mean your hair is down, are you sure its you!?" I get frustrated and tell him to leave it then (because obviously if he doesn't think its me he's not at liberty to sell me anything).

He then says "No, no, I was just wondering because of your hair" he still has my ID in the air looking at it and then back at me. He does in the end sell me the cigarettes and his colleague next to him says "you've upset her." I then tell him that "he shouldn't treat customers like that" As I walk away he says "sorry miss."

I'd rather he just refused to sell me the cigarettes and I'd have just left, there was no need for this stand off which left me feeling a little bit humiliated. I know that in the big scheme of things it doesn't matter but I really didn't like the way he went on about the whole thing.

I rang the general enquiry line to ask what procedures they'd have in place for bad customer service. I told the rep that I wouldn't want to report him if it meant that he'd lose his job. The rep said in all likelihood he wouldn't lose his job but the store manager would have a word with him and he advised I contact the store directly. So should I call the store manager?

OP posts:
usualsuspect333 · 25/04/2015 15:06

No.

Lilicat1013 · 25/04/2015 15:08

I think since his his behaviour was pointed out at the time and he apologised (I know not a great apology but he did) then it would have been better to leave it there. Make a complaint if it happens again but I don't think there is a really good reason to do it this time.

DurhamDurham · 25/04/2015 15:12

I wouldn't want to get so wine into trouble for something so trivial, just imagine if he is new and still in his probationary period, it might hinder his chances of being kept on. I'd only complain about someone if they had been very unhelpful/rude, I would know whether to complain straightaway, the fact that you had to think about it means you should probably leave it. If in doubt it isn't worth getting someone in to trouble.

DurhamDurham · 25/04/2015 15:13

Someone not some wine...........I haven't been drinking, honest Grin

AuntyMag10 · 25/04/2015 15:15

I think leave it. Really it's not a big deal. He stopped when it was pointed out.

TidyDancer · 25/04/2015 15:23

This is so trivial I can't believe you even made a phone call tbh. It would be very very unfair of you to make a complaint when there really aren't grounds for one.

YouBetterWerk · 25/04/2015 15:38

Eh???

Shakey1500 · 25/04/2015 15:41

It's not something I would bother reporting.

loveandsmiles · 25/04/2015 15:44

I don't understand what your problem isConfused

GlitzAndGigglesx · 25/04/2015 15:48

If you don't want to get him in trouble don't report him, but if it really upset you you could've spoke to the duty manager there and then. I never understand why people go through head office if they don't want to make a big deal

finnbarrcar · 25/04/2015 15:50

He probably fancied you. I have a very good looking friend in her early forties and she gets asked for ID all the time by male shop assistants as a lame way of finding out her name and address

HazleNutt · 25/04/2015 15:50

was there something else? From the way you described it, I don't understand what was upsetting you. Based on the post, yes it would be U to report him - for what, saying you look young and asking if it's you?

KingJoffreyFanciesDarylDixon · 25/04/2015 15:50

He sounds like an arse.

"Are you sure it's you? Your hair is down."

WTF. Report him. He was supposed to serve you, not question your identity and your hair.

He's not doing his job properly anyway. Doesn't matter if he loses it.

kali110 · 25/04/2015 15:54

He questioned you to check it was you before he would serve you?
I don't get the issue.
Yes ywbu to complain about him.

CaptainAnkles · 25/04/2015 15:55

Regardless of whether other people can understand why you felt embarrassed or insulted...if that's how you felt, you should complain.

HelenF350 · 25/04/2015 15:59

I can't understand what you are so upset about. He was questioning whether it was you in the photo. It is him that can be fined if he serves someone underage, he is entitled to question you. I do not see what was so offensive. My passport and driving licence photos look nothing like me, I was 6 1/2 stone heavier with long brown hair, (now blonde cropped). I am surprised mine hasn't been questioned but wouldn't blame someone if they did.

ilovesooty · 25/04/2015 16:00

I agree with Glitz
If you felt embarrassed and wanted to complain I think you should have done so at the time.
I suspect the duty managers are used to it. I quite often ask to see a duty manager to provide positive feedback for the person who's served me and the look of relief on their faces says it all.

pressone · 25/04/2015 16:01

OP - word of advice - don't go abroad, you'd hate the face to passport checks they do at immigration.

ShipwreckedAndComatose · 25/04/2015 16:03

He was supposed to serve you, not question your identity

Actually I disagree. If he had any doubt about age he could not serve her. If she was underage for cigarettes he would be breaking the law.

Although I agree that he didn't handle it particularly well.

KingJoffreyFanciesDarylDixon · 25/04/2015 16:04

If he didn't think the ID was the OP's then he could've called his manager, not waved it around exclaiming loudly and humiliating her.

And what's the point of asking if the ID was the customers? Unless he's going to whip a lie detector machine out it's a pointless question.

Original poster
NoPillows · 25/04/2015 16:05

I haven't complained about him Kali If I had then there'd be no need for this thread as it'd have been done and dusted. And no Glitz I haven't gone through head office!

It's not about being asked for ID either, that is standard practice as I know their policy is to check anyone who could potentially be under 25 so the IDing in itself is not the issue. It was the pantomime act. The loud pondering and gesturing. I'm not in a police line-up fgs. Just give me back the ID and refuse to sell. No need for the extras. If I do call the store it has to be today as otherwise it's just not worth it as it happened earlier this afternoon.

loveandmiles my deepest apologies that you don't understand what the problem is - usually I'm used the this:
Assistant: 'Have you got ID'
Me: 'Yes, here'
Assistant: 'Thanks'
Me: 'Thanks, have a good day.'

In an alternative scenario it could have been:

Assistant: 'Have you got ID'
Me: 'Yes, here'
Assistant: 'I don't believe this is your ID'
Me: 'Ok'

OP posts:
TakeYourFinalPosition · 25/04/2015 16:08

It's not that simple. They have to record the reason that they pass or reject the ID after you leave. If they don't believe the ID is legitimate or belongs to you, in some cases they may be required to take further action (call the police, for example).

ID training is a pain. Think 25 is complex. He faces a big fine if he gets it wrong. I understand that you would have preferred a more low key transaction but he'll probably get better with time - if not he will fail inspections anyway.

YourMaNoBraBackOfMyCar · 25/04/2015 16:10

Sounds to me like he tried having a laugh with you but failed miserably. Don't get him punished for it. Your reaction told him all he need to know.

Original poster
NoPillows · 25/04/2015 16:11

pressone thanks for your concern. I can assure you I've been questioned many a time at immigration. Difference is they are guarding against a potential threat or unlawful entry to the country. Not a packet of cigarettes.

OP posts:
Original poster
NoPillows · 25/04/2015 16:14

TYFP As I said, providing ID is not the problem. I was once ID buying knives so I totally understand the policy. Even if he did eventually say no and have to log it somewhere then so be it! But why the Pantomime act. Just say no. Don't keep me there for 10 minutes debating to yourself whether or not it's me based on my hairstyles and loudly declaring my year of birth. Just be done with it and say no.

OP posts:
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